Poison Kisses

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

A member of our group starts a discussion with this sentence: "My heart is heavy and I am crying." She goes on to tell us about an 18-mo-old doodle she bred who escaped from an electric fence and was hit by a car and killed. In her grief, she came to us for support and comfort. And two fellow members of "Doodle Kisses", people who supposedly love doodles and want to connect with one another, share questions, knowledge, ideas, laughs, tears, etc., responded to this grieving fellow member's post by giving it "1 star" ratings. This was very helpful in contributing to her pain.
I am absolutely sickened by this. Oh, did somebody's widdle feelings get hurt because there was a warning in there about invisible fences, and they have one, so they were insulted? Grow up! A BELOVED DOG IS DEAD!
I have news for you two...when someone posts a warning about something, whether it is a collar, a food, a toy, whatever, they are trying to do you a favor and protect your beloved dog. No one has anything to gain by telling others about something that happened to a dog...they are trying to help YOU. You have every right to ignore any advice you read...I do so often. But to anonymously "slam" a kind woman who has turned to us in grief...you should be ashamed of yourselves. I pity your poor doodles that they have to live with people so devoid of compassion.

[Jacquie Yorke (DRC)]

Well said Karen.....

[2hl9mp3c2fuam]

Well this was obviously meant towards me and I NEVER meant to SLAM anyone. How dare you say that you pity my doodles. I would never try to hurt anyone on purpose nor in relation to a death. I was simply explaining how these fences are different and in my research (which doodlekisses helped me get) there are some really bad ones out there. It was not the fences fault the dog ran through it. Never the less. I am sorry I offended anyone.

As for the rating I honestly don't even understand it or use it. So I'm not even sure what that means - I only use it when voting contests. I went back and gave it a 5 since it seems to be a big deal. Maybe you can explain it to me????

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Lori:
I am very sorry that you interpretted my post to be meant against you...I assure you that it is not in any way! It is not directed to anyone who posted a response to Janie, whether they discussed fences or not...you and everyone else who posted were honest enough to say what you thought openly. This discussion is directed at those who rated Janie's post poorly, and I believe that those people did not post anything at all.
If you look up at the top of this discussion, right under the title, you see the two groups of stars...one for you to give the discussion your rating, and one which reflects the cumulative rating it has gotten from all the votes. Much of the time, there will be no rating at all. But when you look at the main page under the forums, you see the titles of all the current discussions, and the orange "star rating" beside them. Naturally, when you see ones with 5 stars, it makes you think that is an interesting or worthwhile discussion. Earlier today, Janie noticed that her discussion, which had been rated 5 stars after only 2 votes, had dropped to 3 stars after 4 votes. This meant that two people had rated it at 1 star...that hurt her, because for someone to go to the trouble to rate a discussion and only give it one star means they obviously think it is a silly or bad discussion, or something about it upsets them. Janie was only expressing her grief and trying to caution people about what could happen...it was really not meant to be a discussion of the pros & cons of invisible fences. It did not seem reasonable that someone would rate a request for support so poorly, unless they were just trying to be mean.
Again, I am truly sorry if there is anything in my discussion that made you feel it was directed against you...that is absolutely not the case. I was speaking against hurting others' feelings, not trying to do so myself. Honest discussion and differing opinions are always acceptable...deliberate hurtfulness is not. If I thought I knew who had given the "1 star" ratings, I would have addressed this to them directly. I am sorry you thought it was directed to you. :-)

[Joannie]

Thanks for clarifying. We know how much Lori loves doodles!

[Tamara & Giada]

Yes, I believe Lori to be a good doodle parent!!!!

[2hl9mp3c2fuam]

Thank you for explaining the rating.... I honestly never understood that. I am just so upset about the whole thing. I am just not a cruel person and would never hurt anyone... especially someone like her. I thought that because I defended the fences somewhat you actually created this discussion.

Anyway - thanks for writing me - I feel a little better.

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

I'm glad you're feeling better! I am not a cruel person, either, (nuts, maybe, but not cruel) and I wouldn't create a discussion for the purpose of attacking an individual.
Now, I did want to point out that the person this is really directed against had been here earlier and given my discussion one star, without leaving any comment. please join me in saying, shame, shame, on you, you big coward, whoever you are! LOL...

[2hl9mp3c2fuam]

Seriously? Oh geez...LOL!! Well at least I learned how the rating works. I just gave it a 5 so now it is at 4........LOL!!

Well now I can go to sleep w/out bad dreams!!

Thanks again!! I also wrote Patty and she confirmed it wasn't me - I guess I'm emotional tonight?!?!?!?!!?

Take care and I'm sure I'll see you around the site!!

[Jacquie Yorke (DRC)]

Don"t worry Lori...We all know you are a kind, warm hearted dedicated and absolutely wonderful Doodle Mommy!

[2hl9mp3c2fuam]

Thank you!

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

I keep saying "Janie" when I mean to say "Patty"...but you knew who I meant!

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Thank you, Ann. I know that if I were a breeder, I would worry over every single one that I helped bring into the world...I believe that is part of what separates the good breeders from those who are only trying to make a buck.
I have had the experience of hearing that one of my foster dogs died 9 months after going to his new home, and I cried for days. So I can only imagine how hard it must be for you.