Can we make a new rule on DK: No more rehoming discussions on the main forum!

[Sherri, Sophie, Winston, & Kitty]

I don't know if anyone has ever suggested this before but I'm just wondering since people aren't allowed to advertise puppies or breeders on the main forum, why are members allowed to come on here to advertise their adult doodles? It's particularly irritating when it's a new member who only joined for this purpose and will be gone as soon as they find someone to give their dog to.

 

I think there should be a group for "owner rehomes" so people looking to dump their dogs can go there to make all their silly excuses and the rest of us don't have to see it and be saddened by it. And people looking to adopt adult doodles can go there and sift through the 'advertisements". All of these posts about rehoming supposedly perfect dogs makes DK a very sad place to come to sometimes. I came here to see pictures of cute doodles to liven up my crazy day at work, and instead I see another completely ridiculous rehoming post that leaves me sad and angry. I'm starting to feel like coming to DK is like gambling with my happiness, one day all is good, the next day, sadness and frustration.

 

I really don't know how other members, particularly those who have been here a long time, have managed to deal with this for so long, but I'm asking nicely could we please find a way to stop all this rehomeing nonsense on the main forum and let's get DK back to being the happy place it was when I first joined. pretty please? :)

[F, Calla & Luca]

Well, said.

[Sherri, Sophie, Winston, & Kitty]

I agreed with the idea of setting up a link and even offered to draft the info.

 

I guess what I'm venting about is that DK for me has always been a support group. So when a doodle has an issue, like Hurley and his cysts, just like my Winston and his allergies and seizures, we go here for support. If someone came here and said, "I'm really scared because I've tried everything and I want to keep my dog, can I please get some advice on how I can fix this problem and keep him in my life", that's one thing. But when people advertise their sick/older/untrained dog as being a wonderful opportunity then it bothers me. I realize I can't control what people say and I can't make DK the way I want it as it's not my forum, but I'm just saying it would be nice if there was a way to manage these posts, just as we do breeder posts and breeder recommended posts, etc. so that DK continues to be a support group rather than an advertising site for unwanted doodles. Again, the link for information is a perfect idea and I'm going to get started on drafting it this week-end.

 

As for people's responses being negative, well, I don't remember anyone saying anything overly negative to that girl, nor to the guy before her, ... people were offering her some suggestions and that's it. Us regulars have been making a concerted effort to tone it down and be nice and I think we've been doing a good job.

[Linda, Webber and Seda]

Eric, as unpopular as it might be, I agree with what you have said.  

[ERIC A. NATER]

Linda, Thanks, a lot of people have said similar things since I posted.  There are a lot worse things that can happen to a Doodle than being rehomed, and sometimes that is remaining where they are.  I hope this discussion will result in help for the Dogs that should be rehomed, and less negative comments and accusations from Members.  That young woman was trying to save a Doodle, and people did not even check to see that it was not her Dog, and instead of giving the names of the proper people to help her, felt the need to question her motives. These people should choose not to read these posts if they bother them and refrain from commenting.  As someone who has Fostered Dogs for years, I know rehoming can be a good thing, and like I said when I Foster a Dog for six months, I am basically rehoming that Dog when picking what I hope will be it's forever home. I am appalled at the reasons these dogs are no longer wanted,but trying to shame a person rather than helping the Dog is just as bad.  This young Lady was not treated right, and I can understand why her Post was pulled.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Eric, I have been thinking about your comment and I wanted to respond.  I agree with some of what you are saying and I can only comment on my comments to this girl. When I first read the post, it seemed to me that she was "on the fence" about rehoming Wally and that is why I tried to offer some solutions in case her parents changed their mind. I did thank her for helping Wally and also referred to her page and could tell by the post this was her parent's dog and she was not in agreement with rehoming.  It seemed to me, but apparently not to others, that there was hope for Wally to stay in the home. I was also in the process of getting the links together and then the discussion was closed. I agree that an unwanted dog is best rehomed and while we probably don't agree with the poster we should try and do our best to stay neutral and help the DOG.

As for Hurley, I think the difference was that Regina came on DK and said from the get go that she had no intentions of rehoming Hurley because he was sick and look how DK got behind that family and offered help.  I never looked at Hurley as a sad story, although it was sad that he had to go through all that, but I looked at it as a hopeful story of a dedicated owner and a wonderful community that offered help. Those stories I never get tired of hearing.  I also think the DK community would get behind anyone who needed to rehome their dog based on illness, death, etc.

I have thought long and hard about this and I think I have come to the realization that people who post they want to rehome their dog are not looking for help other than to get rid of that dog and you are right in that with that said, we should just offer the link and move on. I guess I always want to think somehow they will change their mind. As it turns out, this dog had already been listed on Craigslist and is now on Petfinder, so I do wonder why they were familiar with those sites, but did not know about the DRC and IDog.

As for a solution, I feel we need a clear cut link to refer these people to, that offers information to rescue groups and what to do when rehoming your dog.  When we have that link, which Sherri offered to do, we can just click on a discussion, post the link and suggest they close the discussion to avoid heated comments and go to the DRC and make a donation to help in a different way.  I appreciate your comment as I was someone who responded and I think we both want better results next time. Thank you for fostering.

[F, Calla & Luca]

Amen, Laurie!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Finally you agree with me :)

[ERIC A. NATER]

Laurie, Thank you, I agree that we have the same ideas and hope for a good solution.  I do want to clear up about Hurley.  I was not referring to that as anything to do with rehoming.  It was in reference to Sherri, who said she only wanted to see cute Doodle pictures, and read happy things.  I used Hurley as a sample of a story that was not happy, but because she posted it on this site, it brought out good people who helped her,which started out sad, but turned out to be Heart Warming.  So, I say to those people that are looking for escape and happy stories to just read those, because the majority of the Posts fall into that category, but not to discourage people that need help from posting what can be considered as sad Posts.  It is not pleasant to read about a sick or injured Doodle, but by Posting on this site a Poster can get help and emotional support, and that is a big part of what the site should do.  It is not all about Puppy Pictures and good times.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Eric, I was almost sure that is what you meant and when I think of Hurley it makes me proud to be a part of this awesome community. Sometimes we can be amazing and I feel that most people on this site really do want to help all these dogs, but we do need to find a better, calmer way. I keep telling myself that, but sometimes I don't listen :) I have made up my mind to offer rescue group information only in the future on these posts and move on. Thank you!!

[Sherri, Sophie, Winston, & Kitty]

Hi Eric, I don't know if you read my reply to your post but I totally feel that DK is a support group and things like Hurley's recovery are a positive contribution to DK. Hurley's story was sad but his owner's request for support and her dedication to her doodle was heartwarming. 

 

The problem that I am raising is with the people who don't want support, they are not members of this community and they just come here for a quick fix and then they are gone. The discussions they generate end up causing quite a negative commotion. The purpose of my discussion is to find a solution to keep DK feeling like a community support group and not like an advertising site for unwanted dogs.

 

I am not so naive as to think the world should only be about fluffy puppies and sunshine - I've certainly had my share of doodle health issues and am very greatful for all of the support I've gotten on this site.  I'm simply looking for a solution to a problem that has been creating a lot of commotion on this site for a while now, with very little results for the doodles that need the help.  I think a place for them to go to get objective information targetted to their needs is the right thing to do and I am happy we have all found a compromise to help address the issue.

[ERIC A. NATER]

Sherri,  I totally agree with you about the discussions that are generated by these people, but would still not want to discourage non members from posting to rehome their dogs. I would rather see them post here than on Craig's List!  Hate the owners if you must, but help the Dogs!  I hope what has been generated by this discussion will also create a way to help the Dogs without creating a long and heated discussion. I think it is more important to question and educate people that come on the site looking for a Doodle than it is to criticize someone who is trying to rehome one. I see this kind of advice often here.  If people can be properly educated they may decide that it is not the right time to get a Dog, and it will be one less Dog we see on the rehome list!

[ERIC A. NATER]

Laurie, My second paragraph did not make it, so I will try again.  I love your Blogs!!  You just did one on rehoming, and you were able to display both the pain and tragedy of rehoming using a great amount of humor. Just like the Posts for help, and the advice, your Blogs are an important part of what makes this a diverse and wonderful site. There is plenty of room for opinions, but I think judgement should be held in check.