Labradoodle & Goldendoodle Forum
Extra special surprise for DK members!!!!
Ironically, it actually wasn't too bad. I ended up able to redirect him into a sit, he dropped it, then went nuts over it again. Was able to redirect him again away from it & out to go for a walk.
Will post the video when I am back at my computer.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle on
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Everything you are describing, every problem you are having with Stew, it's all connected to your fear of him. As we mentioned in your last discussion, you just can't be afraid of him. Whatever it takes, you have to get past the fear. Until you do, nothing will help and things will just get worse, because he knows you're afraid of him, and he's using it to his advantage. He listens to the trainer because the trainer isn't afraid of him, and he knows that, too.
You have to get over this fear, or you must rehome Stew. The longer this continues, the harder it is going to be for anyone to ever get him under control.
Read what you wrote here. Trapped in one spot in your own apartment, by a goldendoodle? On edge all night on the sofa in your own apartment, because of a goldendoodle? Your own goldendoodle that you've had since he was a tiny puppy?
I don't know, to me, anything would be better than that. Worst case scenario, he does bite you. So?
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Permalink Reply by Adina P on
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I'm with Karen. You've got to get over your fear of him. She's absolutely right. It will not get better and you won't be able to do what you're supposed to do UNLESS you are NOT afraid of him.
Have you vented like this to your trainer? Does your trainer understand how hard this is for you? A training session shouldn't be all talking. Does the trainer have a chance to watch YOU work and help you get better?
You're catastrophising this situation. You're not wholly bad at communicating IN ALL situations simply because this situation is not improving. I can't tell you what you should do instead because I use a wholly different method of training. I have no problem sticking my hand in my dog's mouth if he doesn't drop something. But he learned that VERY early on that I would get what I need from his mouth regardless of his feelings about it. I probably wouldn't do that sight unseen with Stew or any other dog that I wasn't familiar with.
Giving a different command to refocus him will ONLY work if he obeys you with other commands. If he ignores you in general, you can give him 100 other commands and nothing will happen. But he'll only obey you when you can ditch your fear of him enough to follow-through.
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In this situation, I would have told MY dog to "come" and then if he didn't respond I would have used the leash to make the recall happen. Then when my dog was sitting facing me, I would have praised him for coming (even though I made it happen) and then I would have told him to stay and picked up the toy and put it away. Or done some practice with the toy so he had a chance to do it right on his own accord.
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Permalink Reply by Laurie, Fudge, and Vern on
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Jess, I just think Stew and you might not be the right combination. You shouldn't live in fear of your own dog. It's not good for you and it is not good for Stew. As others have stated, things are never going to get better unless you get over your fears around Stew and I know, that is easier said than done. At some point you are going to have to take a very hard look at what is best for both of you. Good luck.
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Permalink Reply by Jess & Stewart on
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I've already come to the realization that this is all my fault, obviously it's me if I'm trying everything & Stew isn't changing his behaviors. I can't rehome him knowing I've made him this way. He's insecure or whatever you want to call it because of me. And he'd be hard to rehome anyway since the guarding is so engrained. All I've ever wanted was a smart dog as a companion & I get one & I end up being the problem.
The trainer is the first one who said "well you are afraid of him". I must not be getting through to him that what he's doing just isn't working & I don't know what to do. The behaviorist costs $450 a session. That's insane.
I'm going to stop posting for awhile, just wanted to post the video since I know the guarding isn't playing. I wish it was.
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Not sure the behaviorist will be helpful because he doesn't necessarily have serious behavior problems. Next time you meet with your trainer, can he just coach you through some training? Have him demonstrate something, then sit on the couch as you work your dog through it? And not DO anything except to verbally guide you?
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Permalink Reply by Lori, Winnie, Bob and Indie on
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Jess, I agree with what others have said in this post and previous posts.
Your statement "I can't rehome him knowing I've made him this way....he'd be hard to rehome anyway..." breaks my heart in so many ways. Please set aside any guilt feelings you might have and consider that both of you might just be happier if you parted ways. It's very possible that in a different environment Stew would quickly learn to stop guarding and accept new leadership. And, you wouldn't have to spend the next 10 years or so of your life in fear. Win/win.
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I agree, Lori. DRC and IDOG have successfully rehomed dozens of doodles like Stew. With the right guidance and leadership, usually from a very experienced, dog-savvy foster, they are usually very happy to relax and let someone else be in charge.
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Permalink Reply by Amy and Annabelle on
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Wow...Annabelle is so passive when it comes to her toys and food, that I am not sure how I would handle that. I would need help, I know that. The hook is cute. You know when Annabelle was in her bitey puppy stage there at about 4 months old, I wore my husbands leather work gloves a lot because I knew she would bite me. But an adult dog that is guarding, I'm not sure having him bite you is the best advice and could be dangerous. But then you think it is a crazy idea too. Good luck
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I *might* know someone near Philly who would make an EXCELLENT trainer for you if you were willing to try a totally new strategy. You'd also have to be willing to kick your fear of Stew to the curb. She is a Pointer breeder and has done a lot of great work in training. She's got skills and would teach you some of the communicating-with-Stew stuff you're having trouble with. I'll let you know if she's available and if she's close enough to you. By the way...what would 'close enough' be?
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I live in the city near the University of Pennsylvania. I don't have a car & haven't had much luck getting Stew in a cab with me. They just turn us away. I have walked with Stew from 43rd Street to 2nd Street before. From West Philly to Center City to Old City. Close enough I guess would be within the main city limits.
If she's anywhere outside the main "city". I doubt a cab would take us. I couldn't even get a cab to take us from 43rd to 13th street, basically straight down 1 street for 30 blocks. Unless I could get someone to take me to sessions.
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