How do you do it?

[Jennifer and Jack]

Seriously, I am asking because I don't know…… Since I am doing quite well right now I decided to do some volunteer work for an amazing animal rescue right in the area I live. These dogs, honestly, live better than a lot of the dogs in my own neighborhood. Truly I should be crying more for the dogs in my neighborhood than these guys, but I cry for them all.

They each have big 'cells" I don't know what to call it, they each have a warm off the ground bed, some toys if they are not destructive of them, food and water. They also have their own play time outside each and every day, usually twice a day. They also go for walks three times a day. The place is oozing with volunteers.  

I started volunteering, Just one day a week. They have a great little day care where Jack can go for the four hours that I volunteer which is good for him.  

I STINK at this whole thing. Even though I know the dogs are so much better off where there are than where they came from… I lose it when after I have walked one I have to put him back in his or her pen.  The look on their face rips me to the point I cry.  They keep reminding me that the dogs are spoiled and loved on all day long but I can't do it.  I want to do it.. You would think it would be simple to walk a dog, give it some belly rubs, bring it to the doggie gym upstairs and play and put him back.  I can't shut the door.  

At first I was nervous because I did everything wrong when it came to getting the dogs. Even the sweetest of dogs is protective of their run. So me being ignorant would put my hand up to the door and would set them off barking.. ( I wish I knew that before I went in there) So I learned how to approach some of the dogs… mostly you just sit on the floor and wait for them to come to the door.. sometimes they never come, some warm up and come.  

I am disappointed in myself because I really wanted to make a difference, instead the staff is comforting me and I feel like a fool…. I am going to try again one more week to see if I can toughen up and keep working with them, otherwise I will move on to doing their laundry and helping with admin stuff.

There is a crew, not me, but a crew that goes into the kill shelters everyday and decides who gets to be pulled out of the shelter and who doesn't.   I can't even look them in the face….I have so much respect for how strong they are.   

So for those who volunteer… what is your mindset, how do you move past the look on these precious dogs faces and shut the door and go to the next dog?

I want to make this work… I don't want to use the staff to make me feel better, I just want to go in there and be good at it.  I am terrible at it but I want to get better.

[Shoney & Ruby]

I volunteer for Hospice. I'm good at it. I  could never volunteer with dog rescues. If it helps to know, our local food pantry gets less donations and volunteers than the dog rescue places. So--maybe consider another type of volunteering? 

Finally, thank you for volunteering.

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

My dh and I are the ones who call shelters about dogs and go there to check them out. We pull and transport, but we do not foster.  It has gotten easier for us, but it does kill me to turn down a dog, or worse, not be able to get a dog because there is no foster to transport to.  My heart hurts when leaving a dog to a questionable fate because we deal with kill shelters.   It sounds like you are volunteering at a pet adoption center/shelter that is no kill.  Those dogs will find homes, unlike where my dh and  I go. Where you volunteer, people care and try to make the animals as presentable as possible.  Not so where my dh and I go.  So, my advice is to pull up your big girl pants and keep at it. This is a worthwhile volunteer pastime and you make a difference to the dogs and to their future owners.

[Jennifer and Jack]

The strange thing about me, one of many, I used to be an ER nurse and I did Adult and Pediatric trauma and I did it just fine.  I could function great.  I loved my job and helping others. I think best under chaos so it worked well for me….  

Nancy, you have all my respect because I couldn't do it…. I feel like something is wrong with me because I believe so deeply in helping other dogs but I can't get their soulful eyes out of my head.  

I don't want to quit because it is hard, I want to learn to do it.  I do other volunteer work and am working feverishly with my surgeons who saved my life to spread awareness about my disease so they can help other patients like me get diagnosed and not go through what I went through.  I just did a lot of media work due to come out soon… but I have always been the happiest in my life when I am doing for others… No one is more deserving than a shelter dog… 

I just want to be able to suck it up and do it……I am going to keep trying at least this week…. if I am still not able to sleep at night, then they said I can clean pens and do laundry…… that might be more up my ally.  You would think I would prefer to walk a dog on a nice day or take it to the doggie gym to scooping poop and washing peed on blankets but I don't seem to like it very much. I feel so bad.  

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

Jennifer, it really does get easier.  That was more my point, honestly.  Especially once you are able to see the dogs you interact with getting adopted.  However, how many people only want to play with the dogs and NOT do the 'dirty' work?  Helping with clean up etc is a wonderful thing and probably really needed and appreciated.  Everyone plays to their strengths.  Notice I don't foster, yet those are the people I admire most.

[Jennifer and Jack]

Thanks..... I really want to keep trying...... I don't mind cleaning...I may have trouble with the bleach and my airways but I can do my best.

I have so much love in my heart I could snuggle some dogs . Help with fundraisers and things like that.. I don't want to quit. I will give it time to see how I do.....more than another week.....

Thanks for the encouragement.

[Doris]

I understand what you are feeling Jennifer.  I just saw on DRC that they are trying to get a doodle out of a kill shelter..  That's great BUT there were several other dogs in the photo - how can those be left behind?  My son volunteered at our local humane shelter (which was no kill at that time - sadly that has changed).  I went with him once and could not go back.  I would have a house full of dogs.  You LOVE animals.  Don't worry about the staff helping you.  If it is meant to be you will get the hang of it and be a wonderful blessing to the dogs.  It is not meant to be you will find something else because that is WHO you are! :)

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

Jennifer, I understand.  I found myself with a year off in between jobs and one morning I found myself crying (again) at that SPCA commercial that played "In the Arms of an Angel," and I said to myself, "this is ridiculous, DO something."  So I called a local rescue that day and volunteered.  3 days a week I fed, walked, and supervised free play.  I did short basic training sessions with each dog/puppy.  I helped clean, did laundry, and helped train others. Sometimes on weekends, a couple of us would plan a field trip with the dogs.  To the lake. The park. We all loved it.  The dogs were always so happy to see us. When I put them back in their pens, they would give me that look, then they'd nap.  In a couple of hours, someone else would be there to hug them when they woke up.  Believe me, these were the lucky ones.  And they all got good homes eventually.  My point is, you have to look at the happiness not the pain.  Whichever way you decide to help, you are helping to create a loving nurturing "place."  Since this is a no kill shelter, I'll say it again -- your dogs are the lucky ones. Is it everything you want?  No.  Is it better than the alternative?  YES!! 

Someday, when I really do retire, I'd like to foster or get involved again.  What I would have a really hard time with is doing what Nancy does (God bless you, Nancy!). Still if there was a doodle, I'd want to get him out.  I saw that Labradoodle in TX on FB and looked at the site.  That was really upsetting.  He's been tagged by two rescues (TG) but all the rest made me feel sick.

Thank you for volunteering and I hope that if this is what you want to do, you'll find your happiness. 

[Deanna M.]

Jennifer, you have a beautiful soul.  It sounds like you are being way too hard on yourself.  I'm sure the staff are thankful to have you there.

Do you know what the shelter's stats are, like how long a dog is there on average, how many lives they save a year?  Are there updates from adopted dogs about how they are doing?  Maybe knowing these things would help to ease your mind and when you have to put a dog back you can think about the fact that this is not permanent, they are going to be loved in a forever home and talk to them about it while you are interacting with them.

I admire you so much for volunteering and whatever you end up doing take pride in it, the people cleaning and dealing with paperwork make just as much of a difference as those doing the hands on loving.