My Least Favorite Things!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

No one has ever accused me of having a voice like an angel, or even like Julie Andrews in the movie, Sound of Music.  In fact, last Christmas my oldest daughter bought me a Karaoke machine and no one will help me set the thing up.  I begged again this Christmas and the two people who reside in this house with me told the two people who got to fly back to Oregon after Christmas to please not help me or else.  Even without my microphone, I sing everyday and I love to make up songs.  Usually, I belt them out in the morning while I am getting ready for the day.  This works well for me when it is just Fudge and Vern in the house, but on the weekends I have to sing through the pain of the audience all but throwing rotten tomatoes at me and heckling me with comments like, “will you please shut up…your voice is so shrill I think you just broke my eardrums…Hayley, check outside. Is there an animal dying?....God in heaven, make it stop.”   Oh well, all good artists know you have to keep working at your craft.  Well, last night the lyrics to my next song came to me while I was sleeping and I wanted to write them down before I forgot them.  Please feel free to sing them along with me to the tune of My Favorite Things from the Sound of Music.

 

My Least Favorite Things

 

Raindrops on muddy paws and poop bags and mittens

Bright yellow throw up and warm hissing kittens

Brown paper packages with urine samples inside

These are a few of dog things I abide

 

Cream colored messy dogs and crisp winter days

Walks in all weather and rough housing called play

Wild geese that fly above and taunt my poor dogs

Sometimes prompting my least favorite jogs

 

Dogs in all colors with their long golden tethers

Cause me to issue corrections and swear like a mother

Silver white snowballs that cling to their fur

These are a few of the things I endure

 

When the dogs fight

When the pee stains

When I want to cry

I simple remember I love these two dogs

And then I don’t ask myself “why?”

Feel free to add a stanza or two because singing really is a great stress reliever, even if you don't sound like Barbra Streisand.

[Deanna & Desi & Cori]

Yes, F, my Latin teacher was indeed funny - in more ways than one.  One mention of the Today Show would immediately send him off topic.  Needless to say, I didn't learn much Latin.  He used to swat flies during class and kept their carcasses in a styrofoam coffee cup.  Also, he was the advisor for our California Scholarship Federation and on our trip to Yosemite for annual conference, he spent the entire weekend pretending to be an exchange teacher from France.  Good old Mo Knudsen!!!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Deanna, I tried to rhyme tethers to something and it is hard. It was the best I could do and I assumed no one would notice :) LOL  I tried leashes, too. I can't get anything by this group.

[F, Calla & Luca]

I noticed but I was too kind to point it out : )

But weathers, as going out in all kinds of weathers would have worked.

and here are synonyms for leashes:

bridle, chain, check, control, cord, curb, deterrent, hold, lead, restraint, rope, strap, tether

If you are going to amuse us you must be precise : )

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

I looked at the synonyms for leashes and didn't find any that I liked. Personally, that was my favorite line rhyme or not and I thought you would be the only one to notice, but knew you would never point it out to the others :) Darn Deanna!  Also, I wanted to mention swearing in some way and weather does not do that....why am I explaining all this...pretend you have an accent and pronounce mother a little oddly.

[Joanna, Zoe & Bender]

Haha Laurie I do this too! Make up songs about my dogs! Except you make up entire songs...I can just do verses and repeat them over and over.
Poor Murphy! Wonder why he hates singing :(
Bender loves when I sing to him...I think it comforts him because I used to sing to him in the car when he was a baby. First time I told dh to do this in the car if Ben cried he looked at me like I was crazy but ended up admitting singing to him when they got back. Haha

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Joanna, Another kindred spirit. Vern sometimes wants to dance when I start to sing. My dogs are the only ones in my family who don't seem to mind my singing at all :) I think I will keep them...LOL!!

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

I also sing made-up songs to JD every day. His favorite one has the same tune as the old Chicken of the Sea jingle. ( "Who's the best doodle...")  However, like Joanna, my songs are just little verses, not entire operettas worthy of Julie Andrews. I freely admit that I do not have an operatic voice, although I did once sing Where Have All the Flowers Gone before a live audience. Of course, I was a lot younger then, and the bar patrons had all been drinking for some time.

But you have inspired me, Laurie! I've always wanted to rewrite parts of My Favorite Things. After all, strudels rhymes with doodles, lol, and doorbells are definitely NOT one of my favorite things. As for schnitzel, I don't know what it is and I don't want to know. Let's see here....

Cream colored cashmere and crisp apple strudels

Big sales at Nordstrom's and noses on doodles

A brand new red Lexus without any dings

These are a few of my favorite things...

 

I'm going to use your chorus, though, if you don't mind. I think that part is perfect. :-)

 

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Karen, I LOVE your verse. LOVE!!! I like all those things, too. Wow...you sang at a bar...we learn something new everyday. I have always wanted to do Karaoke, but after the cruise and witnessing some of those people who thought they could sing, I think I will save my singing for family and doodles. I know someone who has a wiener dog and named it Schnitzel.  Allow me to educate you about schnitzel. LOL

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schnitzel

with pictures and all:

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

"Breaded" was all I needed to know. I knew I wouldn't like schnitzel, it sounds a lot like those breaded veal cutlets my mother forced me to eat. I'll stick with the strudel!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Yuck...veal! I am with you. Give me the strudel :)

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

Karen, I'm leaning towards your version :)

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Thank you, Cheryl! :)