Question about Jack

[Jennifer and Jack]

My life has been pretty crazy the last several months and there really isn't any sign of it getting better.. we will just leave that there....

Sweet Jack amazes me with his ability to adapt to thing and situations. He loves my mom and is very comfortable with her, thankfully.

RIght now, it is just Jack and I in the house. My mom went home for a much needed break and my other family is in between coming.  I have a lot of help but I am back totally taking care of my munchkin.

He is doing great in almost every aspect, he is eating well, pooping well. I even swallowed my pride and am riding an electric scooter to give him a good 45 minute walk every night. ( when it is dark so no one see's me ha ha)

The only issue I seem to be having is... He will not let me out of his sight...he was okay when my mom was here, in fact, he slept with her and then would go back in fourth between our rooms. Now that it is just us, He is super crazy glued to me.... He isn't acting anxious or nervous.. He just wants to be where I am.

I have taken him everywhere I have gone.... drs appointments and for a new treatment I have had to start.. ( yippie for more challenges) 

Before I went to CO, He used to very happily go in his 'office" which was the bathroom, I always have music playing, his bed and toys in there as well as a few snacks and water.  

When I put him in there for instance I was going to go out to get some things with my nursing assistant.. He screamed like he was being murdered and scratched at the door to get out... It broke my heart and I let him out and took him with me.

When we are home together, he is always kissing me and staying right by me, When we are out. He is very much on duty and won't let anyone pet him or pay attention to him. When they try to, he just turns and stares at me... ( remember he is able to detect when I am having breathing trouble)

My issue is... I need to be able to leave him home to go somewhere.. Do I just let him scream it out in the bathroom? He has never been left home where I have not returned ever... Whenever I have been sick I never left him till I either brought him to my moms or till she came here.. So I don't know what the association is...

I don't know how to reassure him, I don't know if he is playing me because he just wants to go where I am going and I am making it worse by bringing him everywhere?

I am not good with tough love and something changed.. He used to go into the bathroom happily and wait for me to get back.....

Any ideas?  Is he just afraid I am going to leave him again and he really doesn't like being at my moms as much as I think? 

I know i have to focus on me but if you can think of anything I can do to get him used to staying home alone again just once in a while for a short period of time I would appreciate it.

I feel bad that he is so loyal to me.. I have an incredibly tough road ahead of me and most of the time Jack will be able to be with me.... I purposely came home from CO for that reason but I can't always be with him 24/7.... though I wish I could because I have never loved anything more then I love him ever....his faithfulness and loyalty bring me to tears.

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

The following you around might be a temporary thing since you were gone, and might ease up once you have been home for a while.

Have you ever tired just leaving him, loose, i.e. run of the house? Is the bathroom door closed when he is there? I am not a fan of closing a dog behind a solid barrier, and it does seem to make some dogs anxious. If he can't have the run of the house, can you gate him in the bathroom or some other room?

[Jennifer and Jack]

 I have been home for about two and half weeks but this is the first few days I am home by myself at night so I bet you are right.. He will adjust....

I don't know why I didn't think to give him free reign  of the house, I just went back to what we always did He can be free in the house if he wants it, I can just close off my office and bedroom where I have a ton of medications that he can get into right now ( we are working on getting everything put away)

That's a good idea.... I will try that......

Your probably right once he see's me around more he might ease up.. He used to lay on the guest bed all day and look out the window without me, now literally I can't get a drink from the fridge without him watching me.... I was taking a bath the other day and I swear, he stood there staring at me the whole time LOL not very relaxing as I think he wanted to go back to bed and was waiting on me.

Those are great thoughts and ideas... I am not thinking so clearly so I appreciate the help. whatever will help him is fine with me......

Thanks Karen, as usual!!   I just want Jack to have the best life possible with the least amount of stress given our situation.   I will never regret getting him but I regret immensely the situation he has to deal with .. and am extremely thankful my mom can watch him and care for him.

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

It's a blessing to have family members who can care for your dogs when you are away. 

I've noticed that many dogs like to lie on a sofa or bed where they can look out a window when they are home alone. I hope that makes a difference for Jack. Good idea to close doors of rooms where they can get into trouble or something that might be harmful.  

[Jennifer and Jack]

It really is, I don't know what I would do without my mom taking Jack...I would never board him .. I would have to hire a live in Dog nanny...... which I would do before I boarded him.   Not that I am judging people who board it is just that I am away a lot... and I would want him to be in his home where he is comfortable.

Thanks for making me feel better and giving me good ideas

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

I agree with Karen. I think Jack is probably ready to have the run of the house when you are gone and will probably spend the time sleeping or looking out the window waiting for you to come back. He is also probably adjusting to his new routine again. Hugs from us.

[Cathy, Fozzie & Shaggy]

Jen, When I came home from a surgery my dogs did a lot of sniffing. I was told it was because I smelled different. The wash used on me to disinfect, all the medacations in my system, and everything else that throws off a bodies chemistry. And we know dogs react to our emotions... It is likely you smell a bit different now with new treatments etc. Give him some time to get used to those smells. I like Karen's suggestion to let Jack roam the house when you leave.
One last bit to think about, you are Jack's whole world!! He's not comparing life before you went to CD to life now. He's thrilled you're home and so am I!!! Please take care!!!
Sorry if this sounds funny, its 4am in Michigan and I'm falling asleep while tping. Good night snd good mornjngf

[Jennifer and Jack]

Thanks, Jack used to have run of the house but he was having accidents where he was going pee ... it was a nightmare... now I have laminate so it isn't so bad... the reason I had him stay in his room was because with the laminate floors they are very slippery and I was afraid he would jump off the sofa or the bed and injury himself and I wouldn't be home to help.

That happen to my friend, her dog fell off the bed and slipped discs in it's back and when she walked in the door it he was yelping and screaming in pain and we have no idea for how long he was like that... so of course that scared me and I wanted Jack somewhere I knew he could fall off anything. ( unless he decided to use the toiled ;) )  

So this is a little off topic but not..... but as an added  because I always share too much anyway.... It breaks my heart in what feels like a million pieces at the thought of causing Jack anything that he has to get used to again, any discomfort or anything that wouldn't make his life exactly awesome ....

I have thought about it, cried about and even asked my mom if she would keep Jack with her and Molly all the time. I know that anyone who knows me on her knows when I asked my mom that that I wasn't dumping my dog.. Jack is my life. Clearly the best thing ever... but I felt selfish making him have to adjust to going to my moms when I go into the hospital.....

I spoke with a lot of my friend who have pets who are in similar situations.. they all also have a family member who steps in for them........ 

My mom refused to take Jack from me saying that there is no way she would because  he is fine and loves being with us both.... Secretly I don't think she thinks I will do well without him, but I wanted to think of Jack

I wanted to post on here and ask and see what you all thought but I was scared to because I guess I didn't want to know the truth...  I finally came to a peace for now and I hope it is the right choice... I decided every home or just about every home has things in it they wish they could change.. Some people have to work all day and the dog is home all day with a walk in between, some people are single and have to travel for business a lot and board .... 

I have not allowed myself to have a lot of things that I wanted in life because I didn't think it was for to them having to deal with being sick... Jack was purchased for me as a gift, when I got him I didn't know anything about the bonds of a dog and a humane.... I don't regret Jack for a second.. I love him with a love I never knew.. but I will never get another dog because the guilt I feel about not giving Jack the perfect life I want for him drives me insane and Jack has a pretty darn good life... He is hardly alone, tons of food, toys, walks, social time...  but even still me being me, I have a tremendous guilt for not being able to provide him with a constant.....  

I can only be there with him as much as I can.... I will provide the best home possible.. He never goes without anything ever.. Never without a walk.. never without love... I guess it is hard to explain and I think probably we all could say for one reason or another we wish we could do something different with our dogs.... I can't imagine how a parent feels and it blows my freaking mind when I see CF people having children knowing in advance the life that child is going to have to face..... I struggle hard enough with Jack.

Okay done venting.... I meant to say that it is hard but I have decided not to beat myself over the fact that I can't provide Jack with everything that I want..... and I have decided his life is still pretty darn good ...... and it takes a lot of sacrifice on a lot of people's part to make sure Jack doesn't go with out.. My whole family knows.. Jack comes first, it makes them crazy.... but the oblige me because there is no winning... and that is all I can do as a flawed dog parent who loves their dog more then life..... 

and that my friends is way more information then you needed but someday I intend on writing a blog about being ill and having a pet and the fairness that it is to a pet.. at least through my perspective.

[Wendy and Myla]

I honestly believe that all a dog wants is love!  Of course they need the basics, but if they feel love, that is when they are the happiest and they will do whatever they can for the person who gives them that love!!!  In Jack's case he's lucky, he has you and your Mom providing him with unconditional love, so he is the luckiest doodle ever!!!!  Don't ever doubt that Jenn - he is a lucky dood and because of that love, he gives you the love you need!!!!  Hugs!!!!

 

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

Jenn, I'm so happy you're back home with Jack :)  I like Karen's suggestions. Finn is my shadow when I'm home, but when I'm gone he lays on the couch and looks out the window, making sure that anything that might wander into the yard is told to leave while he waits for me to return :) I don't think he moves around much during the day, although he has the whole house.  I know closing him in a room would stress him out, because as odd as it sounds, he likes to keep an eye on the door.

Jenn, I think you're an awesome mom to Jack and Jack is a lucky little guy.  He has all the toys, playtime, love, and good food any dog could want.  He knows he's adored and he has a purpose - that's awesome thing for a dog! His is to love you (to pieces) and watch over you when he can be with you.  Plus you have your mom and a wonderful support network which Jack is used to, and makes him feel loved and secure when you're not there. You're back, he has to figure out the situation, but I think he'll relax and adjust.  You said he's a service dog, so he picks up on a lot.  He may be feeling your concern for him and a little bit of your guilt which he translates as "something's wrong." No matter what, there's no doubt in my mind that you are Jack's person and tough road or not, he's exactly where he's meant to be, if that makes any sense :)  ((hugs))

[Jennifer and Jack]

Update!!!! It worked..leaving him out loose in the house worked great! I left the guest room TV on and closed up all the doors that have stuff he can get into .....he didn't cry, scratch or beg ...he just jumped no the bed and laid there...I listened for a while not a peeP


Thank you for helping me think this through....I don't know what happen to make him not like his office anymore other then my mom leaves them out when she leaves.

As far as Jack.....thanks......I know he has a good life....I just wish I could do things different for him......I have a feeling though with my personality I would always fund something that makes me feel guilty about him! I don't know how human parents do it!

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

Yay!  Happy it worked :)

[Jennifer and Jack]

me too.... So happy.