The Vacation From "HELL"

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

I'm posting this as a discussion rather than a blog because I really am looking for some input and suggestions.  Parts of our experience are actually pretty funny, but much of it is concerning.  Two weeks ago today we loaded up the two cars with "beach stuff" and headed out to the house we rent in the Summer at the shore.  We've been doing this our whole married lives, and our kids and grandkids join us and LOVE IT.  Usually it is wonderful family time....but this year not so much.  Dogs are welcome on the beach...they can be unleashed in the early morning and late afternoon and evening to swim and romp together.  Sounds perfect, right?  It actually was great for Guinness, but Big Murph came as close to a nervous breakdown as I think a dog can.  He was paranoid from the time we entered the beach house....smelling, pacing, running to the porch to "guard" his territory.  This house is literally right on the ocean, so there are always lots of people right in front of our porch...and dogs, and noisy seagulls, and boats, oh and the ice cream man who rings the bells several times a day.  All this was too much for Murph.  He guarded, and he barked, and he growled, and he barked some more, and then he paced and jumped at the screen....over and over for two weeks.  Here he is "on patrol" with Guinness....

You'll notice that Guinness has to stand on the picnic table to see out..it was his favorite spot.  Our DDs were totally disgusted with this.  They insisted on cleaning with antibacterial spray before allowing the kids to sit there with food.  That seems a bit excessive to me....I pushed the table cloth to the side while Guinness was up there...what more can they want.

Anyway, it all started on the first day.  My brother also rents a house  at the same time, and he comes with his family so all the cousins can be together.  He has a very sweet yellow lab, and he brought her over to our house for a little "visit" with our boys.  The minute Murph saw Maddy come through the door he went berserk.  He "herded" her into the corner barking and lunging the whole time.  He scared her so badly that she started to shake, cry and then peed.  She was actually cowering.  So I grabbed Murph as quickly as I could and he took Maddy home.  She didn't eat for the next three days.  Murph never showed any teeth, but it was the worst display of dominance I've ever seen from him.  Needless to say, we never put them together again.  I have no idea what brought this about...Maddy is a very submissive and calm dog who should not have been threatening to Murph.  He continued to react to every dog he saw on the beach.  I worked with him every day, correcting when he would start to bark and lunge and then rewarding when he stopped.  It would work for a while, but the next day we would have to start all over. 

Then there were the kids.  All six grandchildren were with us the first week.  We had a "house full" which I know because at any given meal I was usually cooking for 20.  That's a story in itself.  Have you ever tried cooking burgers for twenty (and they eat multiple burgers at any given meal) when they're shouting out while I'm sweating over the grill "I want medium...pink but definitely NOT rare"...or "make mine really well done".  Oh yes, there were many special orders.  All this with crazy Big Murph tethered to me.  Murph was fine with the big kids, but he did not like the little ones AT ALL.  We had a very frightening incident (also the first day) where the 18 month old went over to pet him, and he snapped at him.  No teeth, but clearly a strong warning.  Now there's no way to explain to a toddler that he needs to avoid the dog, so the entire rest of the time, Murph was leashed with me or DH holding him.  There was no way he could be trusted around the kids.  Our daughters were not happy, and they clearly don't understand why we would want to keep a dog who is this unreliable.  They managed to share with everyone that "their Mom loved Murph more than her own grandkids".  Now that just hurts.  They love to point out that we've spent a small fortune on training, and Murph is still "wacky"...their word, not mine.

I could go on and on with the stories, but this is already long enough.  I've been reading trying to understand what is going on with Murphy.  He is so sweet with us, so how can his whole temperament change like we saw these past two weeks?  Is it just genetics, or was he not appropriately socialized in those early weeks? I read where a "traumatic" event in the early weeks can cause problems that emerge later...maybe it's that.  Because he's a rescue, I really don't know about his parents.   I did have his thyroid checked, so I know it's not that...but is there some other hormonal cause?  My trainer has been on vacation and won't be back until Thursday, so I'll be interested in his thoughts.  Needless to say, this is all very difficult.  I love Murph so much, and he will always be with me.  I could never, ever consider any other option.  I just hope and pray that eventually we can get to the root of his problems, for his sake as much as ours.  Poor Guinness seems to get really scared during Murph's "outbursts".  He usually finds a place to just hide.  Here's his "safe place" at the beach....he spent a lot of time sitting on this basket.

So that's it.  If anyone has any thoughts or insights about what may be happening with Murph, I would love to hear them.  I'm feeling pretty "lost" right now.  I just want to do what's best for this guy, but I don't really know what that is.

 

[Anna and Achilles]

ooooo! Joanne, I want a margarita too!

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

A margarita sounds good right about now....although I did try this "therapy" at the beach, but it didn't help.

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

This is the link that your info on Standard Poodles comes from:

http://www.yourpurebredpuppy.com/reviews/standardpoodles.html

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

Thanks.  Probably was. I have an eclectic mix of notes I've written for myself when I look for answers as to why... why... why.  Something to make me understand WHY, after all I have done, my dog still reacts certain ways.

I feel kind of bad I put it all out here in Jane's discussion. Not really what I wanted to convey here, but more what I want to convey as I see so many say the " perfect temperament", the perfect coat, etc.  NOT always so true.  The above probably would have served its purpose somewhere else, and not in Jane's discussion.  Sorry, Jane.

What I wanted to say was, I understand, sympathize, and sometimes go through this myself.

Geesh, I knew you were gone, Jane. I missed you.

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

Don't be sorry.....very helpful.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

I think what you said was exactly right! These doodles come in all temperaments and not all doodles get along with all people and all dogs.

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

I'm definitely NOT going to "shoot you", Joanne.  LOL  I'm starting to believe that Murphy's problems are "genetically based".  Since he's an ALD who knows where the temperament issues came from.  Your information on the development stages is a good reminder.  I haven't thought about that for quite a while.  Let's hope "stage" means these behaviors are not permanent.

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

Nature vs. Nurture.

I look for reasons why.  Too much sometimes.  Then I come full circle and say, it is an ANIMAL. 

Even the best trained animals, act like ANIMALS  in some situations. Just ask Siegfried and Roy.

[Beth and Gang]

Jane, Bless you and your DH for loving Murph enough to stick with him and help him.

My guess is that it is a developmental stage issue, and it is correctable.

This might sound 'off' '  to you but here in Ohio we have an animal communicator that works with issues like this. She is amazing. She helped a good friend with her rescued beagle, who developed issues after living with them for several years. She helped my sisters poodle, who had a strong fear of doorways,among other things. She explained the dog was not abused but was neglected by the breeder, always pushed to the side,was the last one through the door everytime and was always rushed.She said she liked balls but was afraid of them. after a chat she is the best ball diver in her back yard!

Doris met my Guinness who told her he was a labradoodle, not a PWD, and he was a happy dog that didn't need her help, he was with his people. She laughed and off he walked.

Her name is Doris Straka, she has a website, dorisstraka.com. She will also work with you over the phone. Her number is 440-256-1245.

It's just a suggestion, if you are open to it. I think she is an amazing person, and I am in awe of her each time I see her work with someone's beloved pet.

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

I think I saw her the last time I was with you in Youngstown. She was BUSY--of course.  Funny, I saw her website yesterday too. IRONIC.   Impressive Credentials.  PhD., from Case Western. 

Beth, is this the same lady?  Yesterday it said she lived in Brecksville?  Correct?

[Beth and Gang]

Yes, Joanne this is the same lady.She was part of the Pet Expo. She is also  on Facebook for those that belong. Some people don't like this, others are all for it, I say if it works for you that's good enough for me!

[Lisa, Daisy & Dexter]

Beth, where in OH are you? I think I may just call Doris myself about Daisy and all her fears.