To neuter or not to neuter?

[Heidi & Milton]

Hello All!

I have been holding out on neutering Milton because I find it to be extremely unnatural; however, since Milt just turned seven-months-old, we were give the daycare ultimatum, so it is neuter him now, or he cannot return.  Milton absolutely loves daycare (three days per week), but I feel like as his mom I am hurting him by allowing this surgery to happen.  Neutering Milton honestly reminds me of a human lobotomy, and I can't bear the thought.  Quite honestly, since I made the neuter appointment this morning, I have been very teary-eyed about the whole event.  If we lived out in the country, I would never think to do this, but as a city dog, it is very easy to be banned from many things, simply because you have not been snipped.  Have any of you ever dealt with similar feelings of guilt and regret?

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Well, I guess we all see things differently. You did not simply ask if anyone felt guilty about neutering their dogs, you expressed the opinion that you feel that it is unnatural, that it is hurting your dog and that it is comparable to a barbaric mutilation of the brain. 

If you reread your post, I think you will also see that it sounds as if the only reason you are neutering Milt is because he can't go to daycare otherwise. " I find it to be extremely unnatural; however, since Milt just turned seven-months-old, we were give the daycare ultimatum, so it is neuter him now, or he cannot return...If we lived out in the country, I would never think to do this, but as a city dog, it is very easy to be banned from many things"

All of this sounds like like more than just a difference of opinion, it also sounds like a major criticism of neutering dogs. Criticism of any kind is often seen as judgment.

People who have electric fences get offended when someone here expresses the opinion that they are dangerous. People who use electric collars or prong collars get offended when someone here says that they are cruel. It's to be expected that criticism of anything that you personally practice is going to evoke a defensive response. I've learned that the hard way.  That's human nature. When you post opinions in a public forum, you have to be prepared to get opinions back, and to know that you may not like all of them.

This is also a site that is heavily supportive of dog rescue, and for anyone involved in rescue, public criticism of spay/neuter, especially in a large nationwide forum of dog owners, many of them inexperienced first-time owners,  is very very scary.

 In rereading my original post, I see some questions asked about things I truly do not understand, my own opinions expressed, no personal attacks or criticisms, and no judgments against you.  You clearly see something different, just as I saw something different in your opinions and feelings about neutering than you intended to express. The best I can do is say that I think we both misinterpretted the other's words and that neither of us intended any judgment or personal attacks on anyone else.

[Amy, Cubbie & Ollie]

maybe it would have been better to compare the neutering of a dog to a vasectomy of a human male 

[Adina P]

As far as the experience of the dog, it probably is about the same. 

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

I am all for that, too :) LOL

[Jen and Annie]

I'm certain no harm was meant from any of the responders to the post.  But the title of the thread is "To neuter or not to neuter" - so most of us probably thought you were looking for feedback on whether or not you should go through with it, as opposed to querying the group just on the feelings of guilt... 

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Exactly.

[Colleen, Jake & Baxter]

Heidi, I would just like to address the statement that you mentioned above.  "If we lived out in the country, I would never think to do this,"

My sister and BIL and their formally intact Labrador named Buster Brown live in the country with lots of property and very few neighbors who are miles away.  My BIL never used to believe in neuter/spay either because that is how he grew up living in the country. The few neighbors my sister does have do not believe in the surgery either.   Unfortunately, after about having Buster Brown about a year he became quite the escape artist when it comes to fences and/or just bolting out the front door.  They were not really too concerned because he would eventually just wander  back.  Well, one day someone shot him (they do not know who it was to this day) but Buster Brown managed to drag himself back to their front step and collapsed.  How he managed to do that we don't know because he had lost a lot of blood.  How the vet managed to save Buster Brown we don't know either but this dog had a strong urge to live and my sister and BIL had the $$$ to keep him alive.  My BIL is now a firm believer in having all animals neutered and/or spayed. 

My point is is that the country is not as safe of a place to live with an intact male.  I think Buster Brown was going on one of his "visits" and the owner was sick and tired of having him come around. The pain and suffering this dog went through was just unbelievable.  This is a touchy subject and believe me it was especially with my BIL but he will now be the first to tell people how he used to feel about it and how he now feels about it.

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

Wow....how awful....I'm so glad that Buster Brown survived.

[Colleen, Jake & Baxter]

Jane, yes he did survive to live 7 more years but now at the age of 13 his days are numbered here on this earth.  Buster Brown is not doing well now:(

[Lisa, Daisy & Dexter]

Colleen, I have a friend in Kansas who has a big brown Lab named Ringo - believe you me he is neutered but he wasn't before my friend moved from here to their to marry her on-line Sweetheart. When she arrived she was quite shy about her opinion but her new husband was so smitten with her that he gave in and off Ringo went. She was also a rescuer of dogs and was a firm believer in S & N.

I think the passion that everyone has in this department certainly makes it difficult to gently speak how they feel, Heidi please don't take offense Karen is the most loving and passionate woman, especially for our four legged friends. Maybe a agree to disagree approach is called for in this discussion.

:-)

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Thank you, Lisa.

[Colleen, Jake & Baxter]

Lisa, I am glad to hear Ringo is neutered.  Oh how I remember the days when my DH was smitten with me.....they were very short days but it is amazing what they will do for us during that time:*)...LOL!

I think people that have been and/or involved in rescue such as Karen and myself along with many others on DK and even those that aren't involved neutering is a strong subject.  Karen speaks from experience and from the heart and her heart as you mentioned above is truly for our 4 legged friends.