What to do about Tacky? Update with a Plan

[Allyson, Peri & Taquito]

So he's not a doodle - but my chihuahua Taquito is my first child.  I've had him for 9 years and he's my little love bug.  As most of you know, we have an almost 8 month old human daughter named Charlotte.  Doodle Peri loves her and is excellent and very patient with her. They are buds because Charlotte gives her food :) 

 

Taquito, on the other hand, does snap at her. I am always around.  He likes to sit on my lap when I am on the floor playing with Charlotte (probably not a good idea but I feel bad).  Now that C is getting mobile, she is really obsessing over wanting to pet Taquito. She is very slow and he does have time to prepare for the incoming pet. Sometimes he is okay. Other times he gives a big snap (doesn't bite her just does that little shrill toy dog yip), shows his teeth and runs the other way - away from Charlotte. 

 

Here's what is interesting: my mother kept Taquito and Charlotte this weekend while we were out of town.  Peri went to the spa and daycare, which she loves.  Anyway, mom said that Charlotte pet Tacky multiple times (mom was always around) and that Taquito didn't do a thing. He even smiled.  When mom fed the bottle to her, T. sat right next to them - in the chair!

 

Okay, it's ME, I get that.  Any words of wisdom from my DK friends???  I need some advice.  Not too worried, just curious how I can get him to not be so protective over me?  It was just the two of us for 4 years, then DH came, then Peri then Charlotte. He is just really wanting to be the leader in the pack - but only when I am around it seems. 

 

Don't worry - he's not going anywhere, just want some input!

 

Update:  Found one of Jane, Guinness and Murph's discussions on Nothing in Life is Free:  http://www.doodlekisses.com/group/trainingmindsets/forum/topics/not...

Going to start implementing these training tools.  It is my fault - everything. I've allowed Tacky to run the show, without even knowing it.  I make Peri sit and wait for her food, but don't make Taquito. That is horrible. He just does what he wants, this little Bast&*()!  So I start today by re-teaching him to sit and wait for things, crating him when he acts out (for anything), etc...

My biggest issue is going to be bedtime.  I talked to DH and he is really concerned about us not letting him sleep in the bed (can you believe it's DH that is concerned?). He thinks it is going to hurt his kidneys and make him sick. He thinks Taquito is sensitive and this is too drastic a change.  Oh goodness, will keep you posted.  I love my DH though - what a great guy to even think this way.  Thanks TO ALL of you for your input.

Oh and I'm getting the corral/gate thingy.

 

 

[Allyson, Peri & Taquito]

Jane, thank you.  This is the approach we feel more comfortable with (instead of banning the bed, lap, etc..).  Just last night, he was curled up on the couch. When I finally came to sit down, I made him get "OFF" and then later invited him up on the couch to cuddle. Before, I would have just nudged  him over.  He looked at me like I was crazy. He went in the other room.  I will also try to incorporate a sit or down-stay before I invite him up, so he starts to understand he must earn it.  Thanks for your help Jane!!!

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

I'm just back and wanted to take a few minutes to share another couple of thoughts.

I'd worry about only holding Tacky and giving affection when Charlotte is sleeping.  That could reinforce his mindset that she's the "interloper".  You want him to start to understand that YOU are the leader and as a new member of his pack/family YOU control how she's going to be treated.  He has no authority to correct her.  I would take several times during the day to hold the baby and have Tacky lay next to you (down/stay)...then carefully watch his body language.  This whole experience needs to be very calm and you don't need to say anything...just wait for him to show you that he's calm.  At the moment when he seems to have relaxed I would pet, praise and give him a treat (you'll need to have treats handy).  If he makes any move toward the baby I would verbally correct immediately and make him lie down again.  You can kind of "lean into him" if you need to in order to show him you mean it.  At some point when you think he's really in a good mindset you can invite him to come really close (but again VERY calmly)....probably not on your lap, but really close.  Little by little he should begin to see that you're running the show and the baby can be "advantageous" to him....when he stays calm around her good things happen....when he doesn't he's not allowed to be close to you and thinks just aren't going his way.  When Murph was having problems with the grand kids, this was how we started and worked up from there.  You don't want to keep him from the baby you just want to show him that you are going to control what happens when he's near her.

I also don't think it's necessary to separate Tacky and Peri when you feed them.  Again, food is a resource...and you control ALL resources.  My guys are in down/stays while I prepare their food.  They lay right outside the kitchen so they can watch me.  When their dishes are ready I turn around and the one who looks the calmest gets their dish first.  I always stand by them when they eat and if I see either of them moves toward the other's dish (usually Guinness who finishes first), they get corrected.  It really doesn't take long at all for them to really understand the NLIF concept when it comes to food.

Even though Taquito is a little guy I would challenge him.  He sounds very smart and he's going to be learning a whole new way of living.  Be sure that along with the challenges there is lots of praise and reward  when he gets it right. 

I need to look up my prior discussion for how we "baby proofed" Murph.  The situation was different than yours with Tacky, and the kids didn't live here, but there are some similarities that might help.

[Wendy and Myla]

Jane, I could listen to you all day!  You make so much sense!!!!

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

LOL, that's sweet Wendy. 

[Allyson, Peri & Taquito]

Jane, thanks - we have actually modified things to be more in line with what you are saying.  He sat next to us yesterday while Charlotte was out. I would not let him on my lap though.  He snapped when she was crawling (yes, she started getting mobile this week) and I gave a firm NO and put him in his crate for 5 min. Not a peep.  We let him out and he was very different - much more submissive and just sat on his bed while we played. 

I fed both dogs as usual with Charlotte in the other room.

I have been making him sit for treats and before going out.  This morning he sat for the first time on his own. EVER.  I gave him lots of praise. 

It's a work in progress but I do sense that he is picking up on us being in more control. 

Thanks again for all the advice. Don't know what I would do without you all :) 

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

That sounds like great progress...he'll figure things out. 

[Wendy and Myla]

That's so great that he sat on his own - I've been following this discussion and I was thinking he might be too set in his ways but this is great - I think you're going to beat this!!!!  Yeah for all of you!!!!

 

[Nina, Phil, Harlow & Lacey]

Good work Allyson. Tacky is a smart little guy and sounds like he is learning quickly.