Help! Protocol needed for contacting breeders

[Lois]

Hi,

I am a Doodle devotee who is looking for a guardianship arrangement in the Mass/RI/CT/NH/ME area. This is the first time I have ever undertaken this.

I contacted several breeders and arranged with one to set up a meeting in a few days from today. I was very excited about meeting the Dood.

However, I just got an email from that breeder telling me she had heard from another breeder that I had also contacted.

The breeder told me that her time is very valuable and that since I am pursuing other opportunities at this time as well, that she is not willing to schedule a visit for me until I have completed my search.

I feel terrible, as I was not trying to be devious. I sent an immediate apology.

My question is: should I now contact the other breeders to let them know there are others I have been in touch with? What is the protocol here? I sincerely do not want to miss a guardianship opportunity, as I know that Mike and I can provide a wonderful, loving forever home. As importantly, I don't want to offend anyone.

Thanks so much.

Lois

[Adina P]

I'm not a guardian family and not much of an expert on the matter, but my guess is that MOST guardian families became guardians sort of accidentally...they wanted a puppy, the breeder wanted a guardian...and voila a match was made.

So I'm not sure there is a real 'protocol' but my best guess is it is ALWAYS best to be upfront. Breeders have a strong network and if one is suspicious of your intentions it can get spread around in an effort to protect themselves. So...I would call them and re-iterate that you are totally sincere but in an effort to do this right you have contacted many breeders to help you determine the best fit. Ask them what THEY think is appropriate and work with them. In such a matter as guardian homes, I think breeders have the upper hand because it is THEIR dog until the contract is up. So you'll have to just lay it out for them honestly and let them guide you. That's my take on it anyway.

[Lois]

Thanks, Adina. I will do this immediately.

:)

[Ron & LaNese Duncan]

Hello,
I totally agree with Adina's advice. As a breeder, we do not extra time. My suggestion to you is that you call the lady who you were going to meet and have an open, honest, heart to heart talk with her. Hopefully she'll change her mind if she knows you're a serious customer. Good luck!

[Lois]

Dear Ron and LaNese,

Thanks for your wonderful email. You breeders are, indeed, a very busy bunch and I so appreciate your taking time to reply to my question so quickly.

I have contacted the breeder by email and her response was lovely.

Again, thanks.

Lois

[Barbie]

Hello Lois, I'm not sure which breeder/s you have contacted, but Adina is right. We have a pretty tight group of breeders here on the East Coast and we often talk daily to each other. I see you already re contacted the breeder and that's great. Most breeders do talk with the same families more often than not and truthfully it's much easier if we KNOW you have talked with others. Every breeders program is different, and I'm not sure where you live, but my guardian contract states the guardian family has to live within 50 miles of South Windsor - this is for ease of me driving back and forth when the dog is needed at my house.

Because many of us talk daily, we are always checking with each other to see if a breeder needs a guardian because if you had contacted me, you might be closer to another breeder that I would recommend and I would suggest you contact them.
Does that make sense? We all help each other out and it would be so much easier if families knew this.

[Lois]

Dear Barbie,

Thanks very much for your wonderful email and for sharing your perspective.

I have written to all of the breeders that I'd contacted about guardianship and everyone has been very understanding and gracious. I also got a lovely note from the breeder I wrote about in my initial post.

I appreciate everyone's wonderful support. What a great community.

Again, thanks.
Lois

[Rochelle Woods]

Here's my perspective as both a breeder and someone who has utilized guardian homes for 6 years. It is not uncommon for people to be looking at a lot of different options when wanting to purchase a puppy. It is less common for people to be seeking guardian options from multiple breeders, but I have had that occur twice myself. Most people aren't interested in guardian situations with just anyone. They typically have a positive reaction to communication and interaction with a specific breeder, and want to work with them, so they wait until the right dog comes along from that person. At least that has been my experience in most cases with my guardian homes. I have some that wait up to a year to be a guardian and they certainly have the ability to go look elsewhere, but they don't. The guardian relationship is a long term relationship, and all parties involved should be very comfortable with the relationship and get along well and enjoy each other and respect each other. Otherwise, the relationship is bound to have issues at some point.

In my opinion, the person should practice due diligence in ensuring the relationship with the breeder is one they feel good about, and vice versa. If they want to meet in person to discuss things, or meet a potential dog first in order to do that, great! If they are also looking at other breeders and their dogs, great! I personally don't mind if I know about this in advance or not. Unless a family has specifically said they will wait for a dog from me or are committing to being a guardian home, I never expect that it is a definite situation and I personally don't feel upset or irritated if they have other options they are considering too. I guess I feel that it's important for me to commit a little time to them and meeting in person in order for us all to see how we feel about each other before proceeding with any expectations of each other. It's a little bit of a mutual interview I suppose.

It sounds as though you truly didn't think it would be a problem to "interview" with several breeders, and for me it's not something that bothers me because the guardian situation is a pretty important part of my program. It doesn't hurt to be upfront about what you are doing though so that way a breeder who doesn't want to meet with you unless you've definitely committed to them can say "no thanks" and not feel like they wasted their time.

Good luck!

Rochelle

[Lois]

Dear Rochelle,

Thanks for your long and thoughtful response. I am learning much of value from you and your fellow breeders and I am most appreciative.

The info you provided has given me additional insight into the very special, very important relationship with not only the dog but the breeder. It will serve me (and hopefully them too) as I continue in my search.

Again, thanks.

Lois

[Susan Redelfs]

Hi Lois,

I'm a breeder in Oregon and I'm usually looking for 1 guardian home or 2 a year. It is a very important that if you are trying to save a puppy for breeding that they get a great home. Usually, my latest guardians, have been referrals from people who had purchased puppies from me. I also have a website where people fill out a puppy application. So, instead of phoning, I would suggest you fill out puppy applications stating your desire. By doing that a breeder can contact you "at their convenience." Sometimes phone calls are more disruptive than e-mail communication. Lastly, puppies are a lot of work. If your desire is simply to get a goldendoodle at a lower cost or price I would suggest checking out a shelter and seeing if they have one. Also, given the economy, you may be able to find reduced cost puppies after the Christmas rush. My guess is that this time of year most breeders don't want to keep extra puppies any longer than necessary. It is one thing if you have great weather and you get let the puppies play outside. It is another thing if you are raising them inside and they start eating your sheetrock walls. (lol). Good luck to you and Merry Christmas from icy, snowy, Portland Oregon. Susan Redelfs

[Lois]

Dear Susan,

Thanks for all of the food for thought. It is sooooo helpful to hear from all of you caring Doodle breeders.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from Snowy New England!

Lois

[Noble Vestal Labradoodles]

I ask everyone who contacts me about becoming a guardian the same thing~

Why do you want to be a guardian home and not an owner? What benefit do you have in this arrangement?

If they answer a FREE DOG I usually tell them they aren't ready for one of my dogs. WHY?
This is an expensive hobby to be in!
I require my guardian families to use my groomer, my vet, my trainer, the dog must be groomed to my liking at all times, must be trained to my expectations and I could call you at any given moment and ask you to bring the dog to me or announce that I am coming over to snap a few pictures of the dog.

Usually my guardian families are people that I have met prior and we just clicked, I loved them, they understood my goals and needs and it just happened.

I am a very trusting person but when someone calls me just to be a guardian I am usually a little suspicious as to why they would want such a heavy commitment.

As for visits and time consumption required. This is a heavy task. Raising puppies in our homes is difficult, we have or try to have a personal life, keep our homes and puppies clean but the reality is we have little time to ourselves after it is all said and done... so when someone comes to me wanting to visit I have to weigh the value... not that a perspective guardian family isn't a valuable resource (because they are priceless) it is that we dont always have enough time. Then there are families that go to every pet store and breeder's property which is scary! They put our puppies at risk~ most of our puppies are promised to other families that have already paid for their puppy. If there puppy were to get sick the family would be a great loss as would the breeder but the visiting family has no liability. So in all it is very difficult for us to just be open like an amusement park to lookie loos (not that you are one).

Just some more light on guardians and visits.

[Lois]

Hi,

Thanks! I am really glad that Doodlekisses exists as I am learning so much from you and others who have so kindly shared their thoughts.

Your question about why be a guardian instead of an owner is a good one.

For me, it's not so much about a free dog as the opportunity to work with an expert, as this will be our first dog. I felt it could be a win-win, as Mike and I are extremely responsible, have a beautiful home and yard, I can take the Dood to work and will have time to take us to puppy kindergarten, and we both have immense amounts of love to give.

That said, it is interesting to hear more about what breeders require. Since I am just in the "application" phase, I haven't heard much yet. It's good to hear your thoughts and those of other breeders because the relationship will need to work for everyone, especially the Dood.

Who knows -- we may end up getting our own pup. It's certainly an option!

Again, thanks -- and Happy Holidays!