Opposite of Wonderful Week!l

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

I am jumping on the bandwagon and hoping to get a blog in edgewise.

 

Have you ever had one of those weeks that if you had to go back and do it again you absolutely wouldn’t?  Well, this has been my week and I would like to exchange it for a better week.  In the scheme of things, it wasn’t any one moment that made it bad, but a series of annoyances that have added up and because I rarely suffer in silence, I am going to share it here.  I love going to the movies, but at times feel as if I should be the girl in the plastic bubble because almost everyone in the theater gets on my nerves.  The other day I decided to go to Tammy and have a laugh.  I always arrive early and rush into the theater like I am going to have to fight someone for a good seat.  More times than not, I am the first person in the theater and then I text Megan and we have a bit of a running gag going when I tell her I am alone in a darkened theater and I hope someone doesn’t come in and try and have his way with me. She always responds that I am safe and anyone with those thoughts would walk in the theater, look around, lock eyes on me, and decide to go next door. 

 

The thing about being alone is you have lots of time for observation and studying people.  Many times, I will say to John that I wish I had the nerve to go up to someone and ask him or her what they were thinking.  For instance, if there were only two other people in the movie, why would you sit directly in front of them?  Or why when I am the only person at the movie do you have to sit in the same row as me?  That happened at Tammy when first three girls came up and sat by me and then another woman walked in and sat in the same row.  There we were…the only five people there all lined up in a row.  Why? I have lots of these kinds of questions. The older I get the more questions I have and the more things irk me. I come from a long line of irked people and my mom happens to be the queen. She can go on and on about her Bridge game and how this man coughed too much, or that woman bids too slowly, or someone else arrived late, and I understand just what she is saying.  Things bother us that don’t bother most other people. Our morning conversations are rarely about the great weather or our happy experiences, but almost always start off with, “you are never going to believe this one.” I get just as mad at the woman who parks right next to my car when the whole parking lot is empty, or the talkers/paper crinklers/commentators/loud eaters and ice shakers who almost always find their way next to me in a movie, as my mother does about the woman who has 35 items in the 10 items or less line at Wal-Mart.

 

Since I have gotten Fudge and Vern I have a whole new list of things that irk me.  When I am out on a walk with my dogs, I really just want to be left alone.  When I pull up to the park and see lots of people, I usually get mad that they don’t know this is our time to walk undisturbed.  If we have docked our boat at some place on the water, I really don’t want you to drive your boat by slowly to show your dog our dogs. The loud barking you hear and the desperate cries of “be quiet” mean we are not enjoying your drive by.  If I am out on the water on a paddleboard with a nine year old, do you really have to bring your pontoon boat within five feet of me when the whole lake is wide open?   And I know better to bring up more bad driver stories because A) I am getting a reputation as an aggressive driver and B) if John has taught me anything, it’s that people tune out repetitive stories.  

 

Most weeks, I can laugh it all off and make a sarcastic joke like you can lead a man to the dog’s water dish, but you can’t make him refill it, but this week there was no quick witted repartee after our power went out.  We had a very brief storm on Tuesday night that took our power out.  There were no downed branches, no anything ominous, just a few thunder rumblings, a lot of rain in a short amount of time, and a little wind.  I judge wind by my five­­-foot rooster.

Here is my cock-eyed optimist!

If it is still standing when I open the door after a storm, then we are good.  In my opinion, every meteorologist should have a five-foot cock-a-doodle-do and refer to it often when predicting the wind. My chanticleer is upright, which means the winds are blowing from the south.  I think this would work much better than color coded charts and maps and arrows pointing this way and thataway to mimic the wind. So, anyways, imagine my surprise when this rather mild storm knocked out our power and it stayed out for 24 hours.  Nothing ruins a week for me like lost power.  NOTHING.  I admit I go a little nutso and truthfully, John should take me to the hospital and ask them to put me into a medically induced coma until the power comes back on.  Nothing anyone says makes me feel better and just a simple, “how are you doing?” might have me screaming, “THE POWER IS OUT, IDIOT!  Later, after the power comes back on, they like to tell me they only went for a priest, holy water, and a cross after my head started spinning around, I started spewing green slime, and was calling myself Regan MacNeil.  

Get the power back on NOW and nobody gets hurt!

Today, things looked brighter. The house was cool again. The TV worked. I could flush the toilet and get water from the tap.  My hopes were high as I left the house to walk the dogs.  I was feeling so fine, I called my friend to wish her a Happy Birthday and then it happened.  A groundhog ran out from behind a tree right in front of my dogs and because I was on the phone and did not have both hands on their leashes, they were too strong for me and rather than do a face plant, I let go of the leashes and watched as they ran into the cornfield without me. Panic ensued, some name calling other than Fudge and Vern, and every command I could think of came out of my mouth in a volume that could break glass. Despite my extreme fear of snakes, I stepped into that cornfield, looked around for two bad dogs, and exited only to find Fudge nearby.  Vern came flying out soon afterward without a groundhog and the walk was over because my heart rate was already at a dangerous level. I learned today not to walk dogs and talk on the phone at the same time.  I took the dogs home and decided it was a day to take a chance and go to the movies.  Maleficent, I told the movie clerk, and I verified the pronunciation, unlike the time my mom boldly walked up to the box office, without a clue, and asked for one ticket to see Pen-A-Lope, when she meant Pe-nel-o-pe.  I decided to call a truce for the rest of the week with fate and was sure we were in agreement, especially after I discovered I had the whole theater to myself.  See, nothing I do bugs me and Megan has assured me time and time again I am safe from a desperate band of marauders. It all seemed perfect right up until the time I took a sip of my Root Beer only to discover I had been given Dr. Pepper instead.  I plan on remaining hopeful for a great end to my week despite the fact that it is storming outside and the lights just flickered.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

DJ, No, I stayed put in the movie theater :) My rooster is a cock-eyed optimist....that was actually my theme...the glass is half full. LOL

[DJ & Chance]

I am sorry I missed this earlier.  One of your best blogs, if that is possible.  Some weeks just go that way--bad dogs, bad movie watchers, bad storms, but then I like the fact that the rooster seems to be drinking a toast to whatever happens.

Now, here is my question:  Did you change seats in the movie theatre?  

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

F, That darn cat is always holding me back :) LOL

Lonnie, I liked the movie. I laughed and that is always good :) Glad to see I am not the only nut at the movies :) LOL

[Lonnie & Libby Lu]

Whoa!  Just reading your week made me tired and frustrated! I totally understand your pain. I can relate to your movie "thing"!  I am always the first in the movie and then I secretly check out each person that walks in and mentally try and figure them out!  LOL  My husband says I am nuts and guess what, he is right:)  I just saw Tammy myself, what did you think about the movie?  I really like Melissa McCarthy!  Sorry about the power "thing" too.  Just not right:(

[F, Calla & Luca]

Laurie you are welcome anytime. All of you except the cat : )

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Jane, I liked both movies!!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Anne, As far as I am concerned the only benefit for me when the power goes out is that I don't even have to pretend I might cook :) LOL Life in the country....you are so right...I love our home, but that is the tradeoff, I guess.

Joanne, Somehow, I can just picture you doing that assignment. I don't know what I would do or say if a total stranger plopped down with me at Subway :) I don't think I could do that assignment EVER :) You probably aced that test...LOL!!

Gail, I agree about my dogs, unless they are running after a groundhog :) I get so mad when I order a Root Beer and the waitress or waiter says, "we don't have root beer, but we have Dr. Pepper." Who cares? It is nowhere near the same thing. EVER! Irks me....LOL :)

Jane, Board games....OMD, I forgot about that...Hayley used to make me play Monopoly. She has every game that ends with Opoly :) I hate that game! LOL  She still talks about the time she came upstairs with one of her Monopoly games and I held out my gingerbread scissors and told her to back off :) Surely I would have gotten off with my defense being we were out of power. BTW...I hate roughing it too!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Bonnie, I smiled all through your comment!! I need your dad's medication asap :) It seems utterly ridiculous that your power would go off if the cock is up= Best.line.ever :)

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

F, Next time our power is out, I know where to go :)

Sheri, You sound like my mom :) We had a deposit on one. The guy kept our money for 6 months...no generator. We asked for it back, got our money back, and since we hadn't had to worry about power outages for awhile, we wrongly thought "we won't worry about it any more." Big mistake. Lesson learned. John is smart...he married me, didn't he? LOL

Camilla, Oh, I hope you are right!!

Julie, LOL...I see I am in good company and you are right, it does get worse every year. I would love some idiot repellant spray, too :) Thank you for understanding about my drink! LOL

Pat, Thank you! I was just thinking about you the other day and wondering where you have been. I can't believe sweet Trav was naughty :)

Thank you, Stella!!

Nancy, Stuff like that really irks me :) I would complain to someone, and not just John :) Glad you got both cards now.

[F, Calla & Luca]

I have about a half house backup generator and it makes life much better.