The Difference In Observation Skills Between Men and Dogs!!!!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

My title might be a little misleading. Right off the bat, I want to say I am not an expert on men, but I have been married to one for 33 years, so let’s just say I know the difference between one man’s observation skills and my dog’s observation skills. On that point, I am an expert.

 

Recently, while my DH was away on a business trip, I bought a large, new rug for our bedroom.  It had been a long time since we had a rug in our bedroom and our hardwood floor had been bare for quite some time.  Anyway, I brought in the huge new bedroom rug and put it down myself. When my husband came home, he walked in the bedroom, stood on the rug and looked at me and said, “Uh oh, you are smiling. What is new?” and proceeded to look high and low for a change. Meanwhile, Vern came in, immediately spotted the new rug, took some good long sniffs of this new thing, and even executed a perfect roll on it, and still my DH could not figure out what was different. Please tell me how you miss a large rug directly under your feet that is being used by your 90 pound Mary Lou Rettondoodle for gymnastics practice within five feet of you?  He did finally notice and said it looked a lot like the rug we had before. The old rug was a vibrant green and the new rug is cream, but I gave him points for knowing we had an old rug. In our house, dogs are more observant.

 

The last time I had my hair colored, it took him two days before he said anything.  He looked up one day and said, “Hey, I like that color. When did you get that done?” I said in response, “Do you remember that day when I said I was going to get my hair colored at the beauty shop and then later that day came home and announced I was back from getting my hair colored at the beauty shop?  Well, that was the day I had it done.”  All he said was, “ It sure looks good! ” Fudge and Vern knew the minute I walked in the door that something was different and they took several minutes to give me a proper smell test.  I swear Fudge knows just by what outfit I am putting on in the morning, if I am leaving the house with or without her.  On the other hand, I could come out of the bedroom wearing my daughter’s wedding dress and veil and tell my husband I am ready to go out for dinner and all he would say is, “How does Pizza Hut sound?”  In our house, dogs are more observant.  

 

Our biggest fight happens almost daily about the garbage. Taking the garbage to the trash is his one big job. Getting him to do it is my big job. He has spent years perfecting his Operation Trash Avoidance Techniques and is now at the top of his game.  He never admits he sees the trash and is now skilled enough to look you right in the eye and say, “What trash?” even if the dogs are circling it like raccoons and you are standing directly over it and pointing.  No matter where that large 30-gallon bag is placed, he has trained himself to maneuver around it and leave it behind as he walks out the door. I started out nicely asking him to take out the trash and have had little success with that route. I am at the point now where I find myself wondering if I threw it directly in front of him while he is walking out the door, and perchance caused an accident or worse, would it be considered Justifiable Homicide? The funny thing is my DD asked me to write something to read at her wedding and I even referenced taking out the trash.  Here is a small part of what I wrote and read to my daughter and son-in-law.

 

 

 

The second piece of advice is to lower your expectations.  I don’t mean on the big things like who handles the finances, deciding where to live, how many kids to have, or when to let your parents move in with you in their retirement years. I mean the little stuff and here is an example.  If you are always reminding your mate to take out the trash, don’t think because you are now married that it is going to change.  Just keep your expectations low and then you are pleasantly surprised if the trash goes out and not upset if it doesn’t.  It is like going to Best Buy and buying something “as is” and then expecting it to be perfect.  Consider this person you are marrying today to be “as is” and your life will be so much easier.  I am certainly not an expert on marriage, but I will tell you that I have been married for 32 years and our expectations are so low now that we have never been happier.

 

 

My husband kept his poker face on and just smiled like he didn’t have a care in the world.  If he knew I was talking about him, he gave no outward sign. What he did do, however, was wipe a tear from his eye and tell me he loved my speech and was very proud of me when I sat back down.  So, I guess in the scheme of things, I should take my own advice and realize I got a real deal with my “as is “ purchase, even if his observation skills need fine tuned from time to time. Besides, I really think Fudge and Vern might be the better candidates to take out the trash, since they are very good at noticing it the minute that bag leaves the can. Eventually, most of the trash would get to the curb. In our house, dogs are more observant.

 

What does all this mean? Well, I think I put my finger on another reason why I love my dogs so much. In my husband’s defense, he works long hours and comes home tired with a lot of things on his mind.  Grownups have so many responsibilities, but dogs don’t have to go to work, make the mortgage payment, mow the grass or fix the leak in the bathroom. They have all the time in the world to watch you and focus on you, because to them you are the universe. Everything you do is important to a dog because you are everything to them. I like that about dogs, a lot!  There really isn’t any way a mere mortal could ever compete with a dog’s observation abilities. In our world, dogs will always be more observant!

 

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Thank you, Angie!!

[Angie, Hudson and Lily]

Karen- Love this line.... "So I guess we could say that getting married is a lot like adopting a dog." along with Laurie's "Keep your expectations LOW" motto. That should be on the application for a marriage license.

Love you blogs, Laurie. You have a great sense of humor!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Cheryl, We have the same discussion about the dirty dishes in the sink. I always tell him the maid quit who used to put his dishes into the dishwasher. I wonder this all the time too.....LOL!!!

[Mimi Linna, Lilly and Lolly]

this blog and responses are great...thanks everyone..

[Ricki and Tara (doodle)]

OMD Cheryl! If I didn't know better I would think we were married to the SAME  man! LOL! That is so cute about Oliver barking about the branch!! Like father like son?

[cheryl & oliver]

Well, I ahve been married to the same guy for 40 years, and he is an accountant.  They like a place for everything and everything in its place, lol...But he has learned over these years, that I am not him, nor do I want to be, lol...He is pretty good with the garbage, he never leaves his underwear or dirty socks on the floor, and he can clean a house much better then I can, thats why I have a cleaning service...does he notice new things in the house or a change in my hair color? No not most of the time.  But will he notice if I moved something he was saving, a piece of mail, or something dumb like that, u bet he does, lol...If I say I just saw that, or let me think what I did with that, his standard remark is " uh oh, I was afraid that you did something with it, it is the kiss of death if you had it and put it away, never to be found again," of course not true, it will show up in a month or two, or maybe a year, so I just tell him, put it somewhere where u know u want to keep it, not on my counters, when I clean off the counters, if it does not seem important to me, out it goes, or maybe into a drawer, who knows.  Can someone explain to me why after he eats something, he rinses out his bowl, or glass, and leaves it in the sink with water in it, instead of putting it in the dishwasher???...the dishwasher is right to his left next to the sink!!! That drives me NUTS!!!..He says he never knows if the dishes are clean or dirty, well look for goodness sake.  If the dishes are clean, the red light is on, if they are dirty, the light is off, not too complicated, and how about opening it to check and see?..Now Oliver and Rennie know every little thing and where it should be.  We had a terrible rain storm the other day, and a small branch came off my tree in front of the windows, Oliver barked for nearly an hour till I realized that the tree branch was not where it was supposed to be.  I went outside, took i to the curb for garbage removal, and he was fine after that.  I guess he is like my husband, lol...But they do know if we get something new in the house, they immediately go and sniff it out, check it out, and if it is a rug, they roll on it. Yes the dogs in this house are way more observent then the "man of the house."

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Karen, Thank you. Yes, I rescued a dog too, that definitely came "as is." How lucky you are that you and Jack found your way to each other!!

F, Good point!

Bonnie, Thank you so much for your comment! It means a lot to me.

[Bonnie and Kona]

Laurie, I am so grateful for every blog and entry you make on DK! You make me smile day after day. What a wonderful gift you have for communicating in the very best way. hugs.

[F, Calla & Luca]

Kids are like that too.

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

I think this might be my favorite one of all your blogs...until the next one, at least.

Dogs can be gotten "as is", too...like Jackdoodle. And one of my prerequisites for successfully adopting a dog is that there must be no expectations. So I guess we could say that getting married is a lot like adopting a dog. I must say that the latter experience was much more enjoyable for me!

But I do think both you and your husband are very lucky. :)