First timer feeling overwhelmed but hopeful

[Dexter Doodle]

Hi all! I picked up my Dexter a little over a week ago when he turned 8 weeks old. I never had a dog growing up and after watching my 13 year old son dog sit for neighbors this summer, I thought I would give him what he always wanted and I also looked forward to a buddy to go on long walks, play fetch, and snuggle with.

I knew puppies were work, but didn't expect it to take over my life. I am a little crazy with keeping a clean and tidy house and it is currently a mess! Dexter unhappily sleeps in his crate at night and is in there when I have to go out, but otherwise he is with me. He usually cries for about 10 minutes then calms down. I take him out once during the night and knock on wood he hasn't had an accident in the crate since the first night. We also have cats and one just completely avoids him, but the other is a ragamuffin and that breed is known not to fight back. I have been successful at getting a hold of Dexter before he gets a bite in. I do worry for my sweet kitty though.

My house has a very open floor plan. Dexter stays with me in my family room/kitchen, but gates won't really work for us. Once I feel he is mostly house trained I will start allowing him to go in the other rooms too, but I'm sure that will be some time from now. We also have a large fenced back yard, but because he is so young, he can walk right through the gate. I keep him close or leashed in the back also.

My husband either works from home or travels occasionally. Since I don't work and was the one who pushed for this, I take on 90 percent of the work. My son doesn't get home from school until 4:30, has homework, music lessons, scouts, etc. he helps, but isn't always around.

I had a trainer in last week when I was completely sleep deprived and hitting a breaking point. She gave me a few ideas to start training with and a few games to play. They work well, but there are times that you can see him just get out of control with jumping and nipping and I start losing my patience and just hope his nap is coming.

There are times when he is calmer and seems to really listen to me and acts so sweet. They are rare, but gives me hope for the future.

I want to walk around with a big smile and say how fun this is as I see so many others do. I know I sound like a big whiner. I am the type of person to just say how I really feel. This is tough and sometimes I am just too tired and don't want to go out in the pouring rain or sit on the floor and entertain and get nipped at. Sometimes I enjoy it, but others not as much.

Everyone tells me the hard work will pay off, but when does it get easier? Looking forward to hearing opinions.

[Christy&Riley]

You definitely are not alone. We were there just over a year ago. I never had a dog growing up. In fact I was scared of them. We get this adorable puppy, life is completely overwhelming and after only a week she gets a fractured leg. (Long story) So now, before we can take this puppy out for potty breaks (which were constant) we had to tie a plastic bag over her splint. But she thought the bag was a toy and would try to bite at it. Plus, the bottom of the splint was pointed and as she dragged it over the cement she would tear it. We eventually took extra drawer liner, folded it up and taped it to the bottom of the splint. Then we started using old pony tail holders to hold the bag up instead of trying to tie it only to have it fall down once we stepped outside. It was difficult enough dealing with puppy days but then the broken leg nearly put me over the edge! Those 3 weeks in the splint felt like eternity. Then we find out the splint rubbed sores on her leg which got infected and smelled. So off came the splint and then we had a shaved leg with sores that we had to put Neosporin on. I'll never forget when my husband says "the vet says to put Neosporin on it." I bring him Qtips to apply it. He looks at me funny and said that isn't going to work. We need to rub it all over. Seriously? It is greasy! How do we keep that off our carpet, etc? To make it worse, Riley had begun resting her splinted leg on her neck. Now that the splint was gone, she would rest her greasy leg on her neck...making her fur greasy now too. I can't believe I survived those 7 weeks!

Then she grew and was too big for me to carry. (Some medical issues.) I remember when she was about 4 months old, my husband came home from working on a Sat morning and I was in tears. "I can't take this. She doesn't listen. It is hurting my neck to get dragged around outside by her."

Enter a trainer around 5 months...Simple things made a huge difference and we really started seeing good progress. Around 8 months she digressed a bit on the training but thinking that was like toddler or teenage years.

I remember at about the year mark we saw the biggest change. Up to that point there wasn't a week that didn't go by when we wondered if we would keep her. Now at 17 months she is really great. Our biggest issue is that she is insanely, over the top excited when she sees dogs or people. She wants to make everyone her best friend. That is still a daily training battle (that I'm pretty sure I am still losing). LOL

A big thing that helped us at the tiny puppy stage was...We laid out plastic in our family room and put a couple cheap carpet remnants over top. Then we bought a puppy pen and put her crate inside. Puppies can squat and potty quickly so I was constantly on edge concerned she would go on our good carpet. This gave me a break from the stress but she wasn't confined to the crate all the time. Eventually she learned to jump out but it was a HUGE help those first several weeks. Well worth the money.

Everyone told me on here that it would get better when I thought there was absolutely no way. But they were right. It did get better. Once I realized it is a marathon not a sprint it helped me deal with things a little better. Just focus on getting through the current day and deal with tomorrow at that point.

One other suggestion...Take lots of pictures now because he will grow FAST! We have little videos from the first week and they are adorable...and we appreciate them more that we aren't sleep deprived and frustrated. :-) Best wishes!

[Lori, Quincy & Frankie]

Great analogy-it's a marathon, not a sprint.  Lots of good advice here on how to pace it to meet both your needs and the puppies!  Good luck and it will get better and yes, it will be worth it! 

[Lori, Winnie, Bob and Indie]

Oh, I feel your pain! The first 2 months after we got Winnie were literally hell- to be completely honest. :-) She was cute when she was sleeping, but that was about it! The rest of the time she was a little monster that constantly had her teeth on either my arms or my pant legs. It's pretty comical now when I think about it..... I walked around the house wearing what I referred to as my "puppy pants" -thick corduroy pants that were riddled with holes from my 'little crocodile.' And, my arms were covered with said crocodile bite marks.I couldn't even give her the exercise that she desperately needed because she would turn into a bucking bronco at the end of the leash. Yep, she was part puppy, part crocodile and part bucking bronco. All rolled into a ball of fur that produced pee. A LOT of pee! My husband reported hearing me mutter the phrase "No bite!" in my sleep. More than once I got to work and realized that I still had dog treats and chew toys stuffed into my pockets. Life was not good...

Fast forward a few months.... at 4 months I started to notice a HUGE change. All of that CONSTANT redirecting, tethering to me and training had finally paid off. She potty trained quickly, my Puppy Pants had been retired to the closet, and my arms were all healed up. She got better and better at walking beside me, and I could kiss her without her biting my nose. She finally realized what was acceptable behavior, and what wasn't. Yes! Bully Sticks were a godsend. And, so was Doggy Daycare after she completed her puppy vaccinations.

Now at 7 months, she is such a gem and I love her with all of my heart! Other than occasional counter surfing and sock stealing, she is a super easy puppy. Her only big "issue" that we are working on now is trying to temper her exuberant puppy energy when people come to the house to visit.  

Hang in there! Your persistance will pay off and one day you will look back on this time with a bit of twisted fondness.... :-)

 

 

[Christy&Riley]

Lori - LOL. I forgot certain things until you mentioned them. I had to wear socks and pants for awhile because Riley had a sole mission to lick you to death. I'm pretty sure I remember one of us saying commands in our sleep. I have also gone to work countless time (just today actually) with pockets of clean poop bags and random treats. I figure it must be similar to parents of humans that have diapers, toys and food. :-)

[Lori, Winnie, Bob and Indie]

Ha- yes, poop bags stashed everywhere! I guess I'm not good at cleaning out my pockets - I still keep finding pieces of dog treats in my washer and dryer.... LOL

[BG and Gavin]

LOL Lori saying "no bite!" in your sleep!!

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

You are not a whiner.  You are in the reality of dog ownership - especially raising a puppy.  Thinking you were getting the dog for your son was your first 'mistake' - your son might benefit from the fun stuff, but he is not going to be up for the 'work' part.  Your hard work will pay off, but I also think that perhaps raising a puppy might not be for you right now, especially if you are doing all the work and that isn't what your plan was.  A suggestion for the back gate - purchase some of that inexpensive mesh garden fencing you can buy in a roll and zip tie it to your gate where Dexter could walk through.  Make sure that your kitties have a safe place to be that Dexter can't get to.

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

You're getting really good advice on how to survive a doodle puppy :)  I won't lie, it's tough, but if you structure his world and train consistently, you'll be rewarded with a loyal loving well behaved doodle.  It doesn't happen in a week or even a couple of months but it does happen. I'd re-emphasize:

1) tether the pup to you for at least 20 minutes a day. During that time, don't pet him or make a big deal over him.  He has to accompany you as you go about your daily chores.

2) keep a leash on him the house.  Finn started out chasing my two cats and I was afraid he would hurt them.  I'd step on the leash when he bolted for one and give him one firm No CATS!  Eventually he learned and today they are friends.  

3) A tired puppy is a good puppy (we can't say that enough). I found walks don't tire them out as much as a good play session with another puppy.  Oh my gosh I'd look forward to those days when he'd sleep for hour afterwards.

4) When he gets really wound up put him in time out (in his crate) for 5 or 10 minutes.  Finn never like his crate but just a few minutes gave him a chance to calm down and he walked in a little monster and out a calm little guy.

5) "zoomies" are normal.  I knew Finn was going to be a wild man between 7 and 9 pm every night so I just made sure he couldn't hurt himself.  Lots of frozen bones or interactive toys filled with kibble.

My experience was that it gets easier at 12 to 18 months but the periods of fun times get better and longer long before that and the sleep deprivation will be over in a couple of months so get DH to pitch in.

Believe it or not, you really will miss his puppy days when he's all grown up. Hang in there.

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

I LOVED the zoomies, Cheryl. Ned would race out the dog door, through the sprinklers, back in the dog door, and around and on the furniture leaving water spots and mud. He made vertical leaps onto the furniture and long graceful leaps off.   Exasperating to clean, but hilarious to watch.  I miss those out of the blue zoomies.

[Rosemary (Ro) and Enzo]

As a puppy, Enzo Zoomies were like clock work! 6 pm...ya know , the time when dinner is being cooked or about to be served? Around and around , up and over the coffee table , circle the dining room table at least 3 times , down the hall, visiting each bedroom...repeat! Then they were over as soon as they began. I learned to head them off, by getting her out BEFORE they set in.
Now, at a year, Zoomies occasionally surface, but usually when we are outdoors. She'll run a path around any given object..widening and tightening the circle. A lot of times, I'm the object! And she snorts like a pig while doing it. Yup....Whack-a-Doodle!

[Christy&Riley]

Riley's zoomies now only occur when she is wet. After a bath she starts tearing around the house like a maniac. When she finds a towel, she will bury her face in it and try to roll around in it. As Nancy said, it is hilarious to watch...particularly because she looks so different when wet...just don't get in her way! LOL

[Maryann,Roo and Tigger]

I totally hear you.  My husband traveled constantly while I was raising children and puppies. I was a clean freak Tired is the new norm for you.  It won't last forever.

You are right - puppy training is tough.  Remember how tiring and constantly using your attention when your son was a baby, then a toddler, etc - that's a puppy all over. Except you can crate a puppy when you have had enough and they mature sooner than children.

I have always found that tying my puppies near me while I worked helped.  Admittedly you will get less down, but it will encourage him to want to stay near to you eliminates a lot of unwanted peeing, pooping, chewing, eating,  If he fusses about the crate, sometimes a sheet over it helps puppies settle down.  Or try giving him his favorite chew toy only in his crate.  The chew toy must be something nearly one hundred percent safe of course - Roo liked Antlerz (little ones), nylabones, and zogoflex toys.  Tigger was never a chewer ( only an eater of odd objects if unsupervised!)

Cut yourself a break and ease up on the housework enjoy the puppy and your son, dust  and toothpaste in the sink will always be there. Enjoy your puppy and your son.  They will both be grown and the darn housework will still be there, but your son will love you for the dog and the dog will love you both.  That's the most important thing.