Four Years Ago, Tomorrow.

Four Years Ago tomorrow.. something in the world would happen, something that would change my life forever, only I didn't know it yet.. I was still contemplating getting a puppy. I was still researching... adding my budget.... finding daycares, vets and school prices .. trying to see if getting a dog was in my budget.... (little did I know Jack would be a gift for me)

On this day four years ago.... I knew I wanted a dog but couldn't figure out quite how to justify that money on a "dog" when I could get a "perfectly good one from this lady who keeps dogs in her back yard that would breed any kind I wanted" Oy VEY...

I have no words to adequately express the love I have for Jack... Jack is a miracle in my life... Jack is the reason when I am tired and don't want to do my treatments that I do them because the thought of leaving him and going into the hospital drives me to the point of insanity.. Jack is the reason I take better care of myself.. Why I can name almost every approved dog food on our list, why I am passionate about dogs, all dogs.. not just doodles.. all dogs.. Jack has opened my eyes to a world I had no clue about.

Jack was my first dog.. He is my only child... Jack was brought to me as a gift to help ease the pain of not being able to work.... Jack has brought more joy and more worry into my life then any living thing.. I have never loved so deeply....

I find it incredible that on the eve of Jack's birthday, four years later, I was offered a full time job working as an RN at home. by one of my good friends, bosses and director of the hospital... Full time benefits... Full time pay... and I never have to take my oxygen off. I can still wear my PJ's.. I know due to my condition I won't be able to do it for long but I am getting the chance again.... I get to stay home with Jack, do all my treatments, I can work from anywhere in the world as long as I have my phone and lap top..... It is a miracle.... you can bet if I am admitted and able to talk on the phone, I will still be doing my job.

Jack and I have so much to celebrate.... we don't need a lot of reason to celebrate, you see when you know how precious and fragile life and being alive is.. you find cause to celebrate just about anything...

While I once again am facing a big medical challenge (sigh) .... we are believing it is one that I can manage from home with out patient treatments........and tomorrow, just like every day we will celebrate.. For we are alive and tomorrow we will be together with my mom, Molly and Jack and a few close friends.... We will celebrate that four years ago tomorrow, My little son was born.

Tomorrow will be all about Jack.. not much different then any other day truth be told..I wouldn't have it any other way.. For Jack and I both live as if it was our last days... I always let him smell the pee where ever he wants... I will always honor him as a dog (except when I make him play dress up for a few minutes) I will honor him and his likes, his desires.. and I will make all his days happy just like looking at his precious face makes me happy..

In spite of crap health, I am the most blessed person in the world.. Health is nothing compared to the love I have....

Thank you for sharing your life with us.. Your stories, your love, your support, Thank you for allowing me to be an insane mom that comes up with crazy ideas that I think will extend my dogs life. Thank you for accepting me as I am and always keeping the "light on" when I have time to come and check in...

Jack brought all of you to me as well....and I am so grateful... Happy Birthday my sweet baby boy...

I love you forever and ever.. and treasure every minute I have with you for as long as it is.

IOne more.. this I called..disgruntled birthday boy!

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Permalink Reply by Cathy, Fozzie & Shaggy on March 5, 2013 at 7:30pm

Oh WOW Jennifer, you and Jack are an inspiration. I sincerely hope you both have a great birthday!!!!!

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Permalink Reply by Jennifer and Jack on March 5, 2013 at 8:12pm

Thanks.. any day Jack and I are both on this side of the dirt is a good day!!!

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Permalink Reply by Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle on March 5, 2013 at 7:36pm

Happy 4th Birthday, Jack! JD says he's sorry about the hat, lol!

We hope you and your mom have a lot of fun celebrating tomorrow!

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Permalink Reply by Jennifer and Jack on March 5, 2013 at 8:13pm

Jack is sorry about the hat too!!! Please tell JD it was only on for less then two minutes total and he was rewarded with healthy treats and a long walk as his pay...

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Permalink Reply by F, Calla & Luca on March 5, 2013 at 7:37pm

Happy birthday Jack and congratulations on the job, Jennifer.

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Permalink Reply by Jennifer and Jack on March 5, 2013 at 8:25pm

Thank you...It is a dream come true..I loved emergency nursing and am grateful for the time I did get.

Right now. I want more then anything to be able to support myself... I hate taking from my family but we knew I could not go back into the hospital or be around people. I have to have an extremely controlled environment and my home was just redone and now it is.

. Even today just going in for a meeting without a mask caused pretty significant problems with my airway.I literally am allergic to something at my job. so next time I have to wear a mask and my boss said I will be able to teleconference in on some calls if my airway still acts up. ..This is just an amazing fit.... I will be doing intakes for all cardiac patients coming in for procedures.... Taking Past Medical History's ordering the lab work they need pre procedure and going over what they can expect the day of their procedure.. I will be able to support myself.. and the thought of taking the load off my parents who off set my living expenses brings me to tears.

It is a big leap because I fought for a very long time to get the benefits I now have... and it wiped out my entire savings account.. but I have three years to go back on disability with an expidited process when I start to deteriorate and am not able to do this anymore.

I am happy and my blood turns cold at the change.. I can honestly say the government makes it so easy to not work and actually doesn't help much at all for people who want to work..

I go in on Friday for more meetings... but I don't think I actually start the position for a few months yet.. it is a new position being formed.

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Permalink Reply by Amy, Cubbie & Ollie on March 6, 2013 at 8:26am

Jennifer, that is great that you have such an understanding boss. This sounds like a perfect situation. Have fun celebrating the job and Jack's 4th birthday!