It's so quiet... sans paws...

[Mandy & Benny]

It will be six weeks this Sunday that I lost Riley.  He was the first dog I've ever had, and I couldn't imagine ever having one better.  I've cried every single day since he passed, but for whatever reason, yesterday I woke up and smiled at the thought of him instead of reaching for the tissue box in anticipation of the waterworks.  I teared up as I smiled, but I didn't have the usual sob-fest.  Finally- progress!  I'm still plagued by guilt and emptiness, but I guess this is a step forward.  I kind of feel guilty for it though, if that makes sense... kind of like I'm leaving him behind.  I know I have to move forward, I'm just having a hard time doing so without him.  I can't look in the backyard, I can't clean the nose smears off of my front windows where he spent so much time, I can't move his giant bed to the basement where I can't see it.  I still wait to hear the tap-tap-tap down the hallway and the nudge at my feet when he thought I was taking up too much of his space on my bed.  The silent house is really making me nuts.  Clearly I'm not past my loss yet, but do any of you think it would be a good idea to start seriously thinking about another doodle?  In some ways I think I should, based on how difficult it is for me to be alone in my house.  At the same time I get a feeling of being disloyal to Riley, kind of like I'm tossing him aside for someone else.  

A friend of mine who bought a doodle because of her love for Riley told me she is getting another one. There are a few in that litter not yet reserved, they should be ready to go at the beginning of June.  They are going to be red, not light like Riley.  I've been going back and forth with it, thinking that by then perhaps I won't be a mess over the thought anymore.  I hate to use the word 'replace', but I've never had to get a pet to take the place of a previous love.  I'm sure many of you have before- how do you do it and not feel like you are being disloyal to the one you lost?  I appreciate any suggestions from all of you wise doodle lovers...

[DJ & Chance]

I am so glad that you have made your decision.  Can't wait to see those puppy pics!

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

Mandy, I think this is a great tribute to Riley. I'm so happy for you. (( hugs))

[ClarkP]

I'm so happy for you!  And yet I understand the sadness too.

It's been over three years since we lost Thule to an accident.  Then less than six months after that my senior BC Cass lost her battle with cancer.  We went from three to one dog in what seemed like the blink of an eye.

But we were overwhelmed with love and support from this amazing group of people on DK.  The way you guys reached out to us was incredible.  I sat down every month after Thule died to write a thank you to you guys and just could never get through it.  So for all that support you guys give to those that experience loss, I give my eternal and heartfelt thanks.

As for your new puppy, they will never replace Riley, nor should they.  Your heart is big enough for both of them.  :-)  We ended up (eight months later) with a wonderful rescue from the DRC.  Boca certainly won't replace Thule.  But we sure do love her equally as much.  Rosco loves her too and got his spark back.

And when you miss Riley when you have your new puppy, I've found that dog fur is the best material in the world for absorbing tears.  :-)

/Clark

[Mandy & Benny]

I agree with you wholeheartedly- the people on this site have been more supportive than many of my friends who don't seem to understand the grief that I have.  It's been a Godsend for me.  When I'm feeling especially sad I re-read all of the kind words that were left for me.  It's like having a group of psychologists and a cheering section all at once!  I'm very thankful for that.  

If you've been able to cope with such a sad loss, I hope that I can come out of this as well as you have.  As sad as this sounds, i'm not really excited of the thought of a new puppy yet.  I'm sure my tune will change when I see my new fluffy friend, but for now, I'm still very sad.  I hope this dog fur is very absorbent because I've had lots of tears!

[Lori, Quincy & Frankie]

I am glad for you, Mandy.  You obviously have a big heart with lots more room to love another dood.  

Wait until you pick up a little guy/girl and smell that puppy breath!  

[Allyson, Peri & Taquito]

Get. The. Dog.!!!!! Run don't walk. You are ready - glad you have made that decision.  I can't imagine not having the sound of paws in my house - muddy and all.

When I was 16, my best friend found our terrier dead in teh street. He broke out of the fence and chased a car. 

Mom said "I will never get another dog".

Two days later she did (backyard breeder, but that's not the point right now). That terrier (next one, Mr. Jake) was the best dog we've EVER had.

Good luck :)