What Do You Think Of This?

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

A FB friend who is also a dog trainer shared this article about "kids and dogs".  I'd love to get thoughts on this.  To me it sounds like laying the groundwork and "self justification" for rehoming a dog who is no longer loved or valued now that there are kids.  This whole idea that dogs are expendable seems to be running rampant....I just don't get it.  http://www.slate.com/articles/life/family/2013/07/kids_and_dogs_if_...

[Adina P]

The title of the article basically is a warning...the same one she ends with. And she blogged because she is a senior editor at slate, so it's job related. And she didn't rehome. She was honest about her feelings. Given that she FELT no love, should she have rehomed him? Is it better to ignore a loved dog, or try to involve an unloved dog, or to rehome?

And frankly I think ALL love should be unconditional, or it isn't love.

[BG and Gavin]

With respect, I think that there are conditions on love in adult relationships. I love you on the condition that you do not abuse me or otherwise bring harm to me or my children and that you treat me with a measure of respect. To have no such conditions would be unhealthy.

Parenting is the toughest job in the world and I do not know how parents are able to keep all the balls in the air. What is truly rubbing me wrong is the tone of this article. It seems so callous. Maybe it is supposed to be edgy or comical in some way, but it just makes me sad for the dog.

[Adina P]

I would agree about terminating a relationship of abuse. But that is still different than love being conditional...or it is a rare exception to the rule.

Also, yeah, I guess she was a bit callous.

[Carol and Banjo]

Laurie,   I feel  exactly as you....thanks for putting my thoughts into words!     I loved my dogs back then....but I was not nearly as "good"  an owner.  I was much more "casual".   I think parenting kids has helped me be a better doggie parent.

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

What do I think? Well, I deleted my first reply! When I first read this, I thought, oh an understandable vent tinged with guilt. She's being honest. Your life changes and whose life isn't crazy and stressful with young children? It gets complicated and it isn't easy to manage everything. But then I read it again, and I had a different take. It's her attitude … it's not entertaining…it's just mean …  and BG used a word I agree with --"callous." It keeps me from feeling sympathy for her.  She's not dealing with a puppy and kids which a lot of us have dealt with. We know the "I'm going to rehome everybody, kids included" moments in our lives.  But you get past that because they are your"family" and perfect houses are overrated and dogs can adjust to less attention and still be loved. I didn't see any of that in her blog.

I was in a large city not too long ago, and I saw lots of young professionals with dogs of all shapes and sizes.  I wondered are we becoming more dog friendly or is it just a trend to dog-accessorize?  Does the dog fill an empty place until that space is filled with something else and then its purpose is over?  I had a similar talk with my kids recently. They were wondering if they should get a dog.  I would love that but I listened to their reasons and all their priorities and concluded a goldfish would be a better choice at this point in their lives :)      

[jenn D]

This is an interesting discussion. I was fully prepared feel some empathy for this woman before I read the article. After all, I have 2 kids (1 with some challenging disabilities) and 4 dogs. Life is hectic at times. However, after reading the article I simply cannot side with her. Yes life is busy with dogs and then kids if you do it in that order (or any order), but she just seems angry about her entire situation (as much with the kids as the dogs). I suspect she wasn't as easy going pre-kids as she suggests. Frankly, dogs, infants, kids all are going to be messy. That's part of the gig. She just seems like a very bitter woman.

One of the first thoughts I had after reading the article was "what are the Legos doing on the floor near the dog in the first place?!" That's probably the reason por Valval was throwing up. Keep small objects away from your pooch, lady. I love my kids in a completely different way than the dogs. But one of the reasons I love my dogs is thst they always give me unconditional love when I need it. Selflessly and continuously. And honestly, I need that as a person. It's unreasonable to expect a human to always look at you like you hang the moon, but a dog sure will. So you make the trade off. You commit to them and their needs and they in turn are completely loving and loyal.

Some people are true dog people. Some people are kid people. I Suspect she is neither.

[Julie and Max]

That was what I didn't like about the article also. That she seemed as BG said callous. I had a dog when my kids were little, I worked full time out of the home, I was always running the kids around, my husband worked 12 to 14 hours a day. The dog did not get as much attention as Max that's for sure. The dog sometimes annoyed me (but so did the kids and husband lol) but I never stopped loving that dog, not even in her last year when she was having seizures every day, having accidents, needing help to go outside. I had that dog for 14 years and I always loved her. That's what got me the most, how can someone just stop loving an animal. While I agree that people should think about it long and hard before they get a dog and all that it entails. It is a huge commitment and not everyone can handle or wants to handle both dogs and kids, it's just her attitude.

[Deanna M.]

I found the whole tone of the article really harsh. I can only hope that anyone who would feel like that towards their dog after having children might change their mind about getting a dog. I saw this article on facebook today and it gives another mom's point of view of how things have changed with her dog since having a baby. http://theuglyvolvo.com/an-open-letter-to-my-dog-after-the-birth-of...

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Wow, this brought me to tears! I sure wish the author of that first blog could read this one! 

[Ricki and Tara (doodle)]

I couldn't even finish this one! Brought me to tears too! Such a difference between the two. This woman loves her dog. :)

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Awwww.....I loved that blog. That's the great thing about dogs. They love us no matter what!

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

I loved this blog too!!! What a difference in attitude. Tears but a smile at the end when Tig got his place on the bed.  I have to admit, because I'm working sometimes my life gets crazy too and I'm grateful Finn is so forgiving.