Going Home Again!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Last Thursday I left home to surprise my mother who is recovering from knee replacement surgery.  I could tell she wanted me home by the way she said, “I’m trying to watch The Voice,” one night when I called to see how she was doing.  Fudge knew something was up when I got the luggage out to begin packing.  John kept saying she seemed depressed, but he seemed to be handling it better than Fudge and had a big smile on his face all week.  I would look up from doing something and find Fudge just staring at me.  The morning I left I kissed and hugged her about 100 times and despite the warnings to make your goodbyes uneventful, I kept telling her I was going to miss her and how much I loved her.  Vern is less perceptive than Fudge and may have thought all the commotion meant I was just going down to get the mail, but once he saw Fudge was getting lots of attention he joined in the fun of trying to block my way out the door as I was loading up the car.  Fudge is a very detail oriented dog and notices everything.  Sometimes it is nice to have someone pay attention to you as if you make the world a better place for him/her. It sure beats coming home from the hairdresser with fixed up hair and having to finally say to your husband, “do you notice anything different about me?” only to have him say, “Hold on, let me look at you.  I give up.”  The last thing I saw when I left the house were my dogs standing at the door, trying to go with me in the hopes that we were just going for another walk and all the packing had just been for fun. 

 

I am getting to that age where leaving to go somewhere is not worth all the effort.  The place I like to be most is my own home and I hate packing and unpacking.  Some people will tell you it is because I bring too much, but I am never going to change. 

I also stress about my dogs, because I know all of their quirks and habits and I am positive they get the best care when I am home.  Sometimes, when I come home from being somewhere and see their food and water bowls empty upon my return, I will turn to them and say, “You had better hope I outlast these other people or you two are screwed.”  John and Hayley have perfected what they think is the perfect response to my cries of distress that my poor dogs are out of water.  They ALWAYS say that they JUST filled the water bowl and the dogs must have JUST finished it off, but since no one's muzzle is dripping all over the place and the dogs are standing there shaking their heads in denial, I never believe them.  I don’t care if they add, “I swear I am telling the truth,” to make it seem more believable, I always side with my dogs.

 

Driving in a car alone for ten hours gives you lots of time to think and I got to thinking about Karen’s interview and what a hard act she would be to follow.  First of all, I have shared almost every detail of my life in my blogs and there is not much more to tell.  I have shared my shoe size and my head size and most everything in between. Oh sure, if Adina asked me what my bra size was I would have to politely decline to answer and tell her instead that I think after a certain age cup size should be obsolete and instead be measured more like a man and his pant’s size.  Yes, I wear a 36 Long or a 32 with a 4” inseam. Please keep in mind this is only an example, but it just makes more sense to me. If she asks me about pet peeves, I would have to tell her the interview would be shorter if she asked me what doesn’t bother me.  In regards to the question about what four people I want over for dinner, I would honestly have to answer Auntie Anne, Little Debbie, Ben or Jerry, and Sara Lee. 

Oh, and I forgot to add it would be a Potluck dinner or a BYOF party, as in Bring Your Own Food and plenty of it. Karen even got asked when she got her first kiss and I am scared Adina is going to take this one step further and ask me something much more personal about my love life and what happens when we are behind closed doors in our marital bed is nobody’s business.  The only secret I am willing to divulge is most of the time we are both awake and if not, we are supposed to wake the other one up if something exciting happens.  When I read how Karen went out and educated herself to learn how to do weightlifting correctly, I am ashamed to admit I haven’t even educated myself on how to operate the Food Dehydrator that I just had to have for treats for Fudge and Vern.  It is down in the basement on Appliance Death Row waiting for a reprieve from the governor. I thought about this on and off all day and it made the time go faster on the way home, which was nice. Doris also kept me company, via the phone, which was even nicer.

My middle sister was the sister we voted most likely to be there during my mom’s surgery.  She isn't bothered by most stuff and since my motto is, “don’t ask me to do it and then I don’t have to tell you NO!” when it comes to most things medically related it just seemed like the smarter choice.   The middle sister has long said she is the one who had the worst position in the sibling pecking order and my oldest sister and I are fine giving her more stories to tell of her persecution on the road to sainthood.  My mom is now in the rehab hospital and doing superb and following all her instructions because she is motivated to return home.  She absolutely despises the food and tells you often as she sits there eating it, determined not to waste a bite.   She is also adamant that she will never go to another hospital or rehab facility before checking out the TV channels that they offer first.  We all have visions of her being rushed by ambulance to some emergency room and seeing our mother clinging to the van door, refusing to enter the hospital because she found out they didn’t have Turner Classic Movies.  

Prior to the surgery I was getting constant updates from both sisters and mom made it very clear that her chart had better be marked DNR.  After the surgery and after the first few days at the rehab hospital, we think the nurses probably greeted each other at shift change by saying, “whatever you do, DO NOT resuscitate the patient in that room,” and pointed at my mother’s door.  The first night I called to check on her she told me her nurse was not up to snuff and was having a bad day. I relayed the news to John and we both wondered out loud if it had anything to do with one of the patients she had been assigned to that night. Now that she has settled in and knows what to expect, things are going better.   She has picked out her favorite staff members and has already been to see the hairdresser to get her hair done.  I have even checked her out of the place twice for dinner and at 87 and less than ten days post surgery, I think that is pretty remarkable.  She has gotten a little testy with me on more than one occasion and told me to stop treating her like a baby.  At these times, I have thought about going out and finding a pair of size 12 ruby red slippers and banging them together three times and yelling, “there is no place like home!” and hoping it takes me back to Pennsylvania to my life, my routine, my family, and my dogs. 

There is some argument about what I am missing most.  I’ve called home every day to check on Fudge and Vern and find out how they are doing.  It isn’t easy when our parents get old. It isn’t easy being old. My mom wants to go back to her life and so do I.  Tomorrow I get my wish and my mom will very soon. She has vowed not to complain about the food where she lives ever again and I have vowed to remind her if she forgets. We both have our work cut out for us, but being home will help. 

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Thanks, F. I had a feeling you would confirm my overpacking. I hope you do it for a long time, too. The doodles have been hugged a million times :)

Deanna, LOL about your MIL :) Better the nurses than you! Thank you!!

Karen, Thank you! You know I loved your interview! I really did think about it on the way home. You MUST meet Jane, no matter what....you MUST! Even JD wants you to meet his Aunt Jane! I am so glad you are going and I can't wait to hear about the trip. Doodles have been kissed, too.

Gail, Thank you! Back home.....YAY!!!

Bonnie, LOL...Next time, I will let you know :) She really is doing great and the staples came out today, which helped. Thank you!!!

Elizabeth, Thank you!

Jane, LOL...I think it is my oldest sister's turn. PLEASE let it be her turn. Thank you!

Sheri, What Adina doesn't know won't hurt her :) LOL

Charlotte, Thank you!! I bet those kids will love Bo. It is good to come home to our dogs.

Donna, LOL about the calmly. I can't say I was calm, but I did not get a ticket like my middle sister did. LOL Thank you!!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Thanks, Carol. Your ears must have been burning. I showed my sister and her DH your bird pictures that you posted on FB. They loved them. Glad your mother-in-law is doing well.

Sandy, I know it is hard, but I think having someone at your house really helps. Who wouldn't love your two dogs? Thank you!

Joanne, ROTFL...weed is what I need when I go home :) LOL I just read this or I swear I would have stopped. I stopped a lot today and even took a nap. Did you see a large headed woman taking a nap in your area today?? I would have let you buy me a root beer! I told mom you said hi!

Pat, My two survived, but they were thrilled to see me and Fudge is right next to me in bed. How dare you leave that sweet Trav for 3 days. LOL

Leslie, Thanks! I feel for your neighbor. Take Halas over there for a hug. I bet that would cheer her up. My mom has those same concerns. She hates anything that makes her look older. The compression socks are killing her.

Lonnie, Thank you! I have missed all of you! I hope you have a wonderful time in San Diego. My house looked a little worse for wear, but everyone is still alive :)

Thank you, Allyson!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Thanks, Cheryl and Joanna. She is really doing great. I am home and what a greeting I got from two Doodles!

Debb, Awww....thank you! It sounds like we are living similar lives :) I am home. Drove all day. Fudge is here beside me and what a greeting I got from both of them. Makes coming home even better.

Ricki, Thank you! I was just thinking about you on the way home. We need a game. Put your thinking cap on :)

Linda, Thank you! I am worn out and I didn't even have surgery :)

Nancy, Thank you! I am already in bed. She has more energy than me.

Camilla, Thank you. I would love to take the dogs, but I never have room in my car after I pack :) LOL I bet your in-laws spoiled Darwin. I would!

Thanks, Lori.  Bette Davis was correct :)

[Donna K & Quincy]

Laurie, I have missed you but it's good to hear your mom is doing well. You can't keep a good woman down. :>) I agree that while it's nice to go away sometimes, the best part is coming home. I'm sure Fudge and Vern will be over the moon to see you. Travel safe and calmly. 

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

I'm glad your mom is doing well, Laurie!! 

[Joanna, Zoe & Bender]

Good to hear that your mom is doing well :)

[Debb, Lucy & Oscar]

Laurie, I think I fell just a little bit in love with you after reading this blog... so funny!  I can relate to so much on so many levels with having an 80-something father who is like a baby when he's ill, but a cantankerous old man when he's feeling himself. Ditto with leaving the doods. I cannot bring myself to even think about it, let alone do it. And packing? You nailed it... I take everything but the kitchen sink. Glad to hear your mom is doing better and I'll bet Vern and Fudge will be so happy to have you home!

[Ricki and Tara (doodle)]

I'm so glad that your mom is doing so well. She's amazing and I guess the fruit doesn't fall far from the tree! I've missed you-it's been awfully quiet around here lately!

[Linda, Webber and Seda]

Glad the surgery went well and rehab is going smoothly. Your Mom is a lucky woman to have you leave the doods and travel to see her and you are a good daughter! I know Fudge and Vern were excited to see you!!

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

I am so sorry your mom needed Knee replacement surgery, yet astounded and pleased that she is recovering so well.  Hooray for her!