My Nothing Kind of Day!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

I get accused a lot from my oldest daughter of doing nothing.  She will call me on the phone and ask me what I am doing and when I say, “nothing,” she usually says she is not surprised.  Whenever I call her and she doesn’t answer and I ask her later why she made me leave a message, she will puff up like a peacock and say in this hoity toity voice, “Mother, I have a job!  Some people work!”  It is so annoying because she stretches each word out into extra syllables and mother comes out sounding like MUTH-THER-ER!  Luckily, she has probably never heard of a Lazy Susan or that would be my new nickname.  She is usually wrong about what I am doing and I am usually doing something, but sometimes at the end of the day I can’t really tell you what I did all day, but I can tell you I am worn out from doing it.  

 

Today, I tried to get my husband to stay home from work, but he thinks doing something spontaneously only works if you have scheduled it on your calendar.  I really don’t think he has ever called in sick and if he has and I am just forgetting, he would have had something like the Bubonic Plague or just coughed out a lung and since I don’t remember any of that, I am pretty sure he has never called in sick. No amount of enticing could get him to change his mind and even when I said,  “We could go to Intercourse for the day,” all he said was, “No thanks, I don't care for Blue Ball."

My youngest has the same strange desire to get to work. School was a whole different ballgame and she could make me believe she was dying right up until the bus pulled away without her from the curb and then would turn and ask me if we could go out for lunch.  Usually I said, “you are in big trouble, but does Ruby Tuesdays sound good?”  Work is different and this winter, despite my warnings, she left in a snowstorm because she didn’t want them to be shorthanded.  It could have been that or I might have mentioned if we lost power we could be snowed in for days together and if things got desperate I might need her help in overtaking her father if we happened to run out of food.

 

Well, I decided today as I was thinking about all the things I had to do, laundry, mow the lawn, clean the bathrooms, etc. that today would be a nothing day.  It started when I let the dogs out and Vern came back into the house and ran smack dab into the screen door.  I had to stop what I was doing and rub his head for a bit and I kept telling him he was the smartest dog ever. 

SMARTEST DOG EVER!!

When I let him out the second time, he proved it by waiting for me to unlock the screen door. Once out, he jumped up on our porch swing.  There he sat swinging, doing nothing, and I thought I should join him. 

Seat cushion has been replaced. The original was done in by Vern, the swinger!

He gets so happy when you swing with him and we sat for a long time with his big paw on my chest and my head next to his and my arms around him.  We probably looked like a couple of “in-love” high school kids and I really did think it was the perfect start to any day.  The thing about Vern is he just breathes you in when he sits with you and I find it so totally endearing that it melts my heart every single time.  He makes you feel like he has never loved anybody more, right up until the moment he uses you as leverage to quickly get down to greet another occupant of the house or mix it up with Fudge.

 

A little later, I sat down on the couch and had both Fudge cuddling on one side and Vern pawing me on the other and I actually said out loud, “Who wants to do nothing today?”  Since my arm was up, Vern already had one paw out, and Fudge was on her back with all four paws in the air, I counted that as six yeses.

Fudge votes YES!

I knew Fudge would go along, because believe it or not, Fudge, with all her outside energy, is the perfect dog to stay inside with and do nothing.  She is the dog I would most likely want to watch a movie with or be sick with, because Fudge would be content to be beside you doing nothing for the entire day.  Vern, on the other hand, can do nothing for about an hour and then wants to interrupt your nothing time to see if maybe we could do something soon. 

 

So, since we were all in agreement, we set out to have a day much like a Seinfeld show about nothing. Even though my dogs raised their paws to do nothing, they still felt their walk was necessary, although I did warn them that pulling me into groundhog holes was something and I forbid it on our nothing day.  We sat at the top of a very large hill on a bench for a while and I took in all the sights and my dogs sat and faced me as if to say, “Are you kidding me? This nothing crap is really boring!” I contemplated if mowing the lawn counted as something and just as I decided I should do it before it rained, an overriding answer came from above and it began to rain. Well, any sane person knows that means to continue on with your nothing day, but we continued to walk.  I am one of the few people who loves to walk their dogs in rain, because I know it means most everyone else will be at home. All in all, we had three walks on our rainy, nothing day.

 

We had a wonderful day and then I started thinking about what to cook for dinner.  I finally decided in keeping with the theme for the day we should go out and when John arrived home I informed him of my decision.  Just so he didn’t think he had married a good for nothing woman, I also mentioned that I had cooked TWICE that week, which could be an all time world record for me and he said he only remembered me cooking once. I could see a kink in my nothing day forming right before my eyes.  This statement caused a back and forth about what constituted cooking and he felt putting corn in a pan of water and handing him hamburgers to grill did not involve cooking.  Even when I added I had also cleaned and cut up strawberries, he just laughed.  I kept saying I was getting full credit and then I added he had to decide if he wanted a pretty trophy wife or a gourmet chef, because he couldn’t have both.  Later, when I was retelling this story to my oldest daughter, she said, “which one of those are you supposed to be?” I ended up cooking dinner and made him swear I was getting full credit.

 

I’m not ashamed of my “do nothing” day. I think everyone should have a mental health day once in awhile or a do nothing day to recharge your battery.  I know not everyone thinks like me and I have a neighbor who just got laid off and still works all day out in her yard, or painting her deck, or cleaning this or that, or redoing something that I thought looked great.  One of these days I hope I look over there and see her sitting on her porch doing nothing.  Meanwhile, if you think my work ethic is substandard, I am going to follow an age-old tradition and blame it all on my mother, who has set the bar low for me.   When she introduces my sisters and me, she always says that this daughter is a Nurse Practitioner and this daughter has a great job at a University and then she always looks at me and adds, “Oh, and this is my youngest.  She has dogs!”

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

Once I retired all my days became do nothing days and I love it.  My messy, dirty house doesn't love it, but I do.

[Lori, Quincy & Frankie]

it's when those do nothing days are  at my office....just sayin...

[Allyson, Peri & Taquito]

My youngest - she has dogs!  Love it, love it so much!  If I could have a day to do nothing, I would. I long for those days.  One Saturday a few weeks ago, I had time to sit outside and read while Charlotte napped. It was divine.  We go to my inlaws who live at the beach in 10 days.  They said they'd watch C while she napped so I could go lie on the sand and do NOTHING.  I fully intend to do that.  We went to beach 2 months ago and while C napped, I went to beach, didn't bring a book, didn't brink phone, ipad, nothing.  I sat and looked at the waves, fell asleep, then woke back up and stared back at the ocean. Alone, in silence, in heaven :)  I love this blog!!!!

[Sheila & Finnley]

 Bravo  Laurie, you are my most respected

"Nothing to do all day" person ever !

I dream  of having a day like that. An entire day, not just half a day ! Finnley would love sharing it with me too. For now though, I'll just vicariously share your nothing to do days, and know eventually I will have one of my very own !

[Lonnie & Libby Lu]

Love this blog!  I love the "do nothing" days and there seem to be more and more lately!  They way I feel, I've earned them and so now I enjoy them!  Cooking?  Oh Laurie I think we are pretty much the same on this subject!  When my DH says "What's for Dinner"?  I say whatever you bring home:)

[Lucy & AnnaBelle's Mom]

Oh man now I have to go buy a swing!  Sounds like my kind of day!  And I think you should tell DH that the hardest part of cooking is actually figuring out What To Cook, so giving him burgers ready to put on the grill is considered cooking dinner!  :o)

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

Laurie, I love "do nothing days" and I just don't have enough of them.  There are days when I find myself more stressed about the "to do list" than when I was working.  I also had a similar "arrangement" with my kids.  Every so often we'd take a "sick day" where they got to stay home from school (one at a time, and I did "call then in sick) and I called into work and took a "personal day".  We would "do nothing" all day....watch junky TV and just hang out.  These days were best when it was raining or snowing out...that was the perfect weather for one of our "do nothing days".  Yes, there were often "out to lunch dates" on these days.  These days only happened about once a year for each child...but they were very special.  I think it must be time for me to have one of these days with the Doods or maybe my girls would let me start a new tradition with the grand kids.  On second thought I think they're both too "buy the book" to call their kids in sick so they could hang out with Nana.

[Nicky, Riley & Boris]

Love this blog, my kind of day.  In fact I'm having one right now. I have perfected the art of working smart and giving the appearance of always being busy. The truth is that often I am doing nothing....but...I never feel guilty, a little smug sometimes but guilt...never.

[Bonnie and Kona]

It sounds like a very busy day to me...entertaining the very demanding doodles. Hooray for nothing days!

[Kaytlin and Cooper]

I work full time and study part time, so am really busy, but i totally agree - everyone needs a nothing day or they go crazy. or maybe we are all crazy here anyway, but nothing days help for sure!