Should I Have Raised Labradoodles Instead of Daughters?

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

 

My daughter moves to Oregon tomorrow. We live in Pennsylvania. I have been alternating between feeling sad and mad about this since she gave me the news. My best friend said she knew I was upset when I lost my sense of humor. I blame myself and my husband. We were stupid. All the while our kids were growing up, we told them they could do anything and be anything. What we should have said is, “You can be anything and do anything within a 100 mile radius of your parents.  If it is farther than that, you won’t like it.”  I really think when they were little, my DH and I should have been whispering, “Always stay close to home,” in their tiny, little, impressionable ears each night as they were drifting off to sleep. What were we thinking?  I mean, why did we spend so much time straightening up after they went to bed, having a little me time, and catching up on each other’s day, when we should have been brainwashing our children to never move to OREGON?

 

Oh, she has told me all the reasons she has to move…a new job and frankly I don’t care. I told her we would be more than happy to have her and her husband and their pets live in our basement and what sane person would turn that down. She asked me if I wanted her to be happy and I felt bad when I said, “If it involves a place called Oregon, I would have to say no.”   She told me after they have kids, she would send them to me for the summer and then laughed when I said, “Make sure you tell them I will be the tall lady holding the sign that says, You don’t know us because your stupid parents moved to Oregon and ripped our hearts out, but we are your loving grandparents.”  All she said was she hoped I got through security with my giant sign.

 

Nobody tells you this when you start to have kids, that someday they might just get a job clear across the USA and there is nothing you can do about it. Dr. Phil and Oprah really let me down on this one. All I heard was to teach your kids to be independent and confident and boy oh boy, did we screw up and now we have an independent & confident daughter on her way to Oregon.  I am writing all this down in the hopes that some of you newer parents can learn from my mistakes. Start the brainwashing NOW, before it is too late. Meanwhile, I am going to start whispering in Fudge and Vern’s ears every night, “Don’t even think about moving or else!”

 

Here are the Stab Your Parents in the Back Soon to be Oregonians:

 

I bet if she knew all these facts, she would turn around and head for home:

 

• In Stanfield, Oregon, no more than two people are allowed to share a single drink.

• It is against the law in Myrtle Creek to box with a kangaroo.

• The hazelnut is Oregon's official state nut. Oregon is the only state that has an official state nut.

• In Oregon it is illegal to use canned corn as fish bait.

• Oregon's state flag pictures a beaver on its reverse side.

• In Portland, people are banned from whistling underwater.

• In Bend, Oregon is a Bowling Ball Garden at a place called the Funny Farm, where you can actually buy bowling ball seeds in the gift shop.

 

 

[cheryl & oliver]

of course it is different, lol, that was you and now this is YOUR Daughter, lol...moving away....I want to be in the airport when you have that sign up, or maybe you should notify the tv stations, I bet they would love this one....Can u hear the headlines on the 11:00 P.M. news ?......I do feel for you, I really do, and yes I did cry when my son moved to New York, but I too have hopes that they will move back down here...they both say NEVER!!!...Great place to visit, and we love you, but we are never going to live in Florida, we love New York and all it offers....But ya never know, right????....Moms can dream and I guess I will do just that...I just saw them in New York, and they were so attentive and loving, both my son and dil...and yes I cried when I left....

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Cheryl, I have always said I am glad I had girls. I think everything you said is true. Plus, my SIL has the same sense of humor we have and I say just about anything and he never cares. God forbid he did not have a sense of humor, he would never make it in this family :) Now, my mother always wanted a boy (she had 3 girls) because she swears they favor their mothers and daughters prefer their dads. Who knows? My girls think my DH knows everything and he is very good about keeping his opinions to himself....I like to get mine out there...LOL!  Shhhh...but my DH and I moved 12 hours away from our parents....but, this is different...LOL!

[Lisa, Daisy & Dexter]

Cheryl, after reading this I swear I am so happy I have a daughter, not to mention a son in law that apparently I have stolen from his mother. LOL

[cheryl & oliver]

Laurie, I have to tell you, just be happy that you have a daughter that you can say and do all this sign holding for!!!..Now for us Moms that have boys, this is another whole world.  Here you raise this wonderful loving little boy into manhood, that thinks you can do no wrong, and along comes this "Girl" and all of a sudden she is the light of his world, and you are lucky to be second fiddle...You do everything you can to treat her like a daughter, but she is nice, but you are not her Mom, you never will be, so she just takes your son, and away they move.  AND even if they don't move far away, (I have one married and lives 15 min away, and the other married and 2500 miles away) sometimes it is not so great to see all that goes on with the ones that live close by.  You have to learn to keep your mouth shut, smile and keep telling yourself, it is his life, it is his life and he is happy, so that is all that counts.  Well, I guess I am rambling, lol, but their is a definate difference between a son and a daughter..As my mother used to say, A son is is son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter for all of her life...And it is true.  Both my sons are wonderful sons to DH an me, but there is a definate difference between the girls family and the boys....But I do have to admit, we try to make them independent confident adults, and when we do, they just up and leave us....(do u think our parents felt the same way???, and do you think that you would have listened anyway, lol)

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Thanks, Karen and Camilla!

Nancy, Your comment has me wondering about these giant mosquitoes. I think I will skip that place when I visit.

Jennifer, I agree with you about the drink...yuck to sharing :)

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Laurie, just seeing this now. I would be feeling very bad for you, but you made me laugh so hard that's impossible!

Seriously, there is also such a thing as having your kids living too close to you. Trust me on this one.

Think of it as a beautiful new vacation spot where you can always get a room really cheap!  And hug those doodles.

 

[Camilla and Darwin]

Doods would NEVER move to Oregon. Not without you. LOL

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

There is a dinosaur 'forest' in Oregon that is awesome and has giant mosquitoes that really bite.

[Jennifer,Chloe & Myla]

Poor Laurie-what a sad event, I hope they are happy there but she'll miss you before she even gets there! Who would move to a place that even lets you share a drink!! You need your own! Like all your facts you found and start that sign now because it is perfect!!!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Lisa, I knew you were my kind of gal...LOL!