They Keep Me Goin'

[Jen, Lachlan, and Declan]

Ye gods, I can't believe I survived the stress of this last week. Still decompressing here, and soooooo grateful for my boys!

I've been working the same job for the last 12 years; a large gov't funded project on a contract that floats from company to company. This is a project that has been running for 30-plus years, so I'm actually one of the "babies" here and my team is very much my family. It's kinda hard to explain, but I don't actually have a "real" family, so they really ARE my family in a very real way. So when the current company announced, two months ago, that they were laying off a full third of the entire company and weren't going to tell us WHO until the first of August ... yeah, a wee bit of stress.

Thursday, the big day when we were all to be told one by one if we still had jobs, I sat at my home computer trying to force myself to get up ... showered ... dressed ... into the car and off to the office. I was quite literally shaking when Pixel hopped up and draped himself over my shoulder. He pressed his little warm cat body against my neck and purred like mad, rubbing his cheek against mine, and I wrapped one arm around him and held him close. Then Lachlan stepped up on my other side and dropped his head onto my thigh, looking up at me with those big brown eyes like "it's okay, mom, it's okay, we love you." I'm not ashamed to tell you I started crying, hugging both of them, suddenly knowing that whatever happened it WOULD be okay.

The entire day was like a mass game of Survivor, each of us being called into the boss's office and walking back out with or without the dreaded Blue Folder of Doom, the rest of us clustered together and waiting to see who was in and who was out. I commented at one point that I felt like the family dog, watching intently up the hall for that first glimpse of a loved one. Every time one of my team came back without that blue folder we all group-hugged and cried, and then hugged the next one to make the walk.

At 1:45 my turn came. My heart was pounding in my throat, but my mind flashed back to this morning and the unconditional love and trust of my boys and I was able to smile when the boss said "shut the door and have a seat." When he followed that with "I won't make you wait and wonder; you're NOT laid off" I swear I actually forgot how to breathe for a moment, but all I could see was those sweet faces that were waiting for me at home.

Yeah, still trying to process it here, but I've spent an awful lot of time this weekend just hugging the boys and feeling incredibly blessed ... because they're right, no matter WHAT happens it'll be okay. As long as I know their unconditional love is waiting for me at home I can face anything.

And they won't have to go find jobs to pay for their bloody expensive kibble!

[Jennifer,Chloe & Myla]

First I'm glad you still have a job and it seems like a job you  like for which you are lucky. Second, I do this all the time with my cat who's 12 I never know how long he'll be around and I can't imagine what that will be like to lose my own pet. So when I go to feed him he sometimes jumps in my lap and I snuggle him and cry and talk to him about all that we have been through together. Then when I come downstairs my doodles run to me to lick the tears from my face. I don't know what life was like anymore without these 3! You made me tear up and I'm glad it all worked out for you all.

[Jen, Lachlan, and Declan]

Just want to thank you all for your kind comments. I've had a wonderful weekend with the boyz and I'm feeling a whole lot more like myself now (for which I'm sure they're grateful).

It was an unpleasant situation for everyone involved, perhaps especially the people who actually had to deliver the bad news. My manager is actually a genuinely nice guy, and by the time he got to me he looked absolutely exhausted. I'm not sure how it could have been handled better, given the number of people who had to be let go at once, and I'm glad for everyone's sake that the wait is over. Even the ones who were let go said that in the end they were just relieved to finally know.

[Carol and Banjo]

I'm happy things worked out for you.   That is a stress no one should have to go through!

[Dori & Rua]

That is so awful that people were made to go thru that.  How blessed you are not to be one of the ones let go.  I am so glad your fur-kids were there for you.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

What a horrible day and seems to me your company could have handled it with more compassion. I am so sorry for those that got laid off and happy you were not one of them and your boys made you feel better.

[Nicky, Riley & Boris]

What a truly awfully stressful ordeal to go through.  There must be an easier way though perhaps there is no easy way to lay off people.  I'm so glad you got through it and you still have your job.  Animals seem to know when we need some extra TLC.

[Deanna & Desi & Cori]

Each of my first three years of teaching, I received the dreaded "pink slip" as California was undergoing budget cuts (imagine that!) and school districts were forced to do a "reduction in force".  My anxious waiting was to see if I'd be rehired in the fall.  As a special education teacher, I had a leg up on the "regular" teachers, but there was still that uncertainty.  Each summer, we'd have to put our lives on hold...

Glad you still have your job, but also glad you have such a great emotional support team at home.  

[Donna K & Quincy]

Jen, glad to hear you kept your job and can keep those two wonderful furkids in the style to which they have become accustomed. You brought a little tear to my eye at about the same point that you started crying.

In regard to you employer, that seems like a very stressful and cruel way to do things.

[Nina, Phil, Harlow & Lacey]

I am so glad you did not get the Blue Folder of Doom.  Isn't wonderful that our furkids seem to know when we need their love the most.

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

I'm so happy that you still have your job, but I imagine you still feel awful about your friends.  I'm so glad you've got Pixel and Lachlan, and that they were there to help you get through this.