DoodleKisses.com

Labradoodle & Goldendoodle Forum

Hi all:

I'm newish to DK in general, and I just found this section about cats today. I was hoping to find help with my situation. Or if someone could point me in the right direction of where I could find good help, it would be muchly appreciated.
We brought home our 4 month old NAR on the weekend, (3 days ago). She's from a breeder in another province and had never seen cats from what I can tell. I have an 11 year old (Callie) and a 3 year old male (Jerry). Immediately, the 11 year old (she's kind of a grump) start making this awful singing sound when she first saw Daisy. They are separated by an opened puppy pen, into their own areas but can see each other. Everything seemed fine even with Callie making her threatening sound. My cats are use to going out into the backyard and cannot any longer with Daisy taking over that area. They started to jump over the wall into her area and she playfully chased Jerry out. He got away fine, he was freaked out and my older cat was crying the whole time, trying to protect him.

Today, my pup jumped over onto the cat side while I was over there. My older cat just went nuts and ran right up to her hissing and scratching I'm assuming. Daisy just played with her and didn't seem afraid but I was freaking out so things may have been different. It was extremely stressful for me, I yelled at my cat and picked Daisy up & put her over onto her side. The second I turn around, while trying to calm the upset cat, the dog jumped over again and the same thing was repeated!
I phoned my husband and he's going to have to come up with a new way for the pen to stay up. Obviously putting boxes on each side to hold the pen sections tight is not working. It's a wide area about 10 feet and there aren't many options for a space that wide. I'd like all animals to have room to move around.


I have had the toughest day with her. Today she chewed a chunk off my console off in my car while I am trying to get her accustomed to being in the car. I hadn't left her alone for more than 30 mins. She was in the shade in underground parking. My car is an '09 and I don't drive it in the winter so it has less than 30,000kms. It's practically brand new still with leather interior. I'm really upset about that and now she's chewing my diningroom chairs! There is visible damage showing and this is when I am sitting here on the computer watching her! I literally have to watch her every second of the day. It's very exhausting. I took a week off work to get her accustomed to her new home and it's been a huge challenge and it's only day 3. 

My cats are getting more and more jealous because I cannot be on their side, but when I leave here, there's damage. She chews on everything. We just moved into a brand new house on April 8th. It was just finished being built 3 days before we moved in. Guess I will have to buy bitter apple and put that on every single surface available.
On top of all that, she's so shy that no one can pet her when we go out for a walk. She is afraid of everyone she hasn't met. It has only gotten worse since I brought her home. Everyday is worse than the last. I am not babying her in any way. I have not picked her up while she's afraid of something at all. I have only picked her up to cut across the cat section to get to the front door and when she's not wearing her leash outside my car type thing. I feel like I am not affectionate enough, but I know that a big problem is too much affection. I've barely touched her at all and I feel guilty about that. I pet her when I reward her for good behaviour.
The breeder let me know after I asked about her shyness that yes, she was aware of that and her sibling (sister) was the same. The boys are not shy at all. Since the problem is getting worse all the time, I really hope that someone has any pointers for me about the shyness, the chewing or the cat situation...please help, I am almost desperate! Thanks

Views: 106

Replies to This Discussion

Christine, there is never any reason to leave a dog alone in a car for even a few minutes, and no dog should ever be left alone in a car for half an hour, let alone a shy young puppy who just left her mother & home three days ago. This is certainly not the way to get her accustomed to being in a car. Even an outgoing adult dog might have done the same thing.
I get the feeling this is your first dog. Puppies chew, and yes, they do have to be supervised every minute. I don't understand the system of "areas" and "sides" you describe, puppies should be crated when you cannot keep an eye on them. If you crate her, she would not be able to chase cats, chew anything, or get into any mischief. An alternative to crating would be to tether her to you with a lead.
Does the puppy have appropriate chew toys and bone? She may be teething, and the chewing helps relieve the pain. Is she getting enough exercise? Puppies chew out of boredom. She is chasing the cats because she wants to play with them. That's normal behavior for a puppy. Certainly you don't expect a four month old puppy who is in a strange new environment to calmly sit there doing nothing; she is used to being with other animals all the time. Three days is nothing at all, the adjustment period takes many months.
I strongly suggest you join the Puppy Madness group and post this there. That's a better place to get suggestions about raising a puppy in general.
Thanks Karen for all your help!

Yes, this is my first dog. I did not know that leaving dogs in cars is not recommended. I don't agree with owners when it's hot and sunny out but I see people taking their dogs with them everywhere and I will definitely take her out, but never leave her alone for that length of time. My husband put a bug in my head about someone stealing her from the car and the whole time I was in Wal-Mart buying some items for her, I came down to check on her twice in 30mins because of him freaking me out. I didn't go close enough to the car to see what she was doing, just to see that she was still there.

This chewing thing has just begun to get out of control today. She was an angel when we first got her, but now that she's getting to know us, she's getting more & more comfortable and all the behaviours are coming out!
She does have chew toys. She has three Kong toys, two for teethers and a wubba squeaky toy. She has a Kong tennis ball and two planet dog stuffed animal toys. I gave her a rawhide type stick today that the breeder provided me with. She loves those toys but she also loves socks and everything else she's not supposed to have. She'll find it, even if it's hidden.

The area I am talking about is my living/diningroom area that is one big open area that I have separated into two using the 8 panels from a puppy pen stretched across the open area. My pup has the kitchen area while my two cats have the livingroom area and upstairs. The pup has access to the backyard and they the front door. Since the area is 10 feet wide, the panels don't stay up by themselves so we stacked boxes on either side (they are full, we just moved) against the panels which the cats were using to jump over and now the pup too.

I put Daisy to bed in her crate at 9pm (she's always exhausted by then) and I get up at 5:30am to take her out for about a 30 min walk. We come home and I give her breakfast then let her run around the back yard a bit playing ball with her. I need her to get used to being crated during the day when I go back to work, so I put her back in at 7am (that's the time I'll be leaving for work). Today I took her out after an hour and let her run around the backyard before taking her to Wal-Mart. I put her back in the crate from 1-2, then she went out for a longer walk at 4pm. She went back in the crate from 4-5 because I was so tired I needed a nap after the incident with my cat. My husband is going to take her out for about 20 mins or so soon.
Should I be taking her out for an hour at al time? I allow her to sniff at times, but I also want to get some exercise too. Maybe I am not walking her long enough? She seems pretty tired during the day. When she's not chewing, she's sleeping.

Thanks for directing me in the right direction of the Puppy madness area.
Christine, I don't think too much affection is ever a problem. It helps the two of you bond. I cuddle both my dogs every chance I get. The chewing sounds to me like she is bored. Make sure she is getting plenty of exercise as a tired dog is a good dog. Also, have you tried bully sticks or antlers. Puppies need to chew A LOT! I think a crate sounds like a good idea too when you leave the puppy alone.

As far as the shyness, you just have to keep exposing him to new things, people, dogs, etc. and praise her constantly. Treats help too when she is meeting new people, etc. and she will start to associate meeting new things with something positive. Yes, you should not tell her it is ok, but stay confident and praise, praise, praise.



I could use pointers too with the cat thing, so I can't help much there. Good luck.
Hi Laurie:

That just about breaks my heart about the affection! I am an affectionate person. I work with disabled adults in group homes and they have not had much affection in their lives. I love being with them and caring for them with love. I have always been an animal lover and am close to my two cats. Since we got the puppy my husband has reminded me "no babying' more than once. Only one time did I sit on the floor with the pup on my legs and he thought that was too much. I guess we both don't know where to draw the line with affection. He probably thinks that was classified as too much, whereas I think that babying with be to constantly shower the pup with love. I really want my dog to bond with me, but I don't want to spoit it. We have watched Brad Pattison's At the End of My leash show and he actually says to not talk to the dog, to not look at the dog for the first two weeks. I'd cry if I had to do that!

I live in a construction site (my street is under development) as well as the entire neighborhood. My pup goes out 2-3 times per day and I walk her by the noisy machines and people talking etc. She is getting exposure to that, it's just when someone spots her and wants to pet her, she backs up and hides her tail between her legs. She growled at my neighbor on our porch the other day when he came over to say hello. Her coping skills need work I guess.

Guess being that I have been a cat lover my whole life, that I didn't do enough research on my pup arriving! I do feel bad about that and will order a couple of Cesar Millan's books. Then, I will read up on what is too much affection and what's lacking.

Thanks for your help!

Christine
Christine, The other thing that really helps is a puppy class. There your pup can interact with other puppies and you can get some training tips. Get some bully sticks and antlers. They were my lifesavers with our first dog. I have so many toys for my dogs and they are very specific about the ones they prefer. The puppy group will help. My kids make fun of me all the time about how dippy I am over my dogs. Love that puppy as much as you can. Your husband is wrong, in my opinion :) (that can be our secret). Your little puppy just went through some major changes and needs to feel secure and loved by you. I threw out the rule book the first night with our puppy and let him sleep with us. Probably a big no no, but I no longer crate him at night and he prefers to sleep on the floor and is certainly not crying every night to try and sleep with us. Doggie daycare would be wonderful too. Your puppy would get lots of exercise and come home tired at night. I don't know who Brad Pattison is, but if that is his advice I would turn off that show.

Enjoy your pup being a puppy, because it goes by so fast, and believe it or not, you will miss it when it is over. Discipline is just as important right now, but to me, this means positive reinforcement when she does what you want and encouragement. Play with her, love her, and you will start to see her blossom. If you think about a spoiled child, it is one that is allowed to do whatever they want, with no guidance or boundaries given by their parent. The same holds true with a puppy. The puppy needs gentle guidance and rules, but also needs to know that she is loved. Follow your instincts, just like you do when you work with those disabled adults.

As far as the cats, all the animals might be picking up on your stress level. I think the calmer you remain will help them too. It is going to take awhile for everything to settle down and animals to get along.

I am sure this is a big change for you, but just hang in there and get in the puppy group and keep posting your questions. We have all been there. I just read where you stood up to your husband..way to go...he is learning too.
First, I don't believe that you can show your puppy too much affection. That is what helps the puppy and you bond and helps the puppy feel secure in her environment. The more secure the puppy is, the less destructive she will be with chewing.

I also can't recommend enough the use of a crate for your puppy. She will feel more secure in there and you can have some piece of mind that you won't have to watch her every second. Put the crate in the room with you and give her safe toys to chew -- kongs, rope toys, etc. I also use the crate in my car when I bring my puppy with me -- they can't do any damage to your car and they are safer in an accident (assuming you have the crate secured to the car).

On shyness:

I got my puppy when she was 16 weeks as well and she was definitely in the shy stage -- she was afraid of everything new. What it takes is a lot of patience and repeated exposure to new things. I just kept taking her on short walks, letting her stop and sit when she was afraid, and let her slowly approach what was scaring her. I always used a happy voice, not babying or pulling, just kept encouraging her. I also brought treats to put near grates, bicycles, strollers and other "scary" new items. I made a trail of treats to the object. Works like a charm. She was also afraid of kids, so we sat near the playground and let her watch. My trainer said that it takes about 5 times (or more!) to get the message across. She was afraid at night as well (something I didn't expect) so we went on night walks as well. I did this every day for the first month.

Then we graduated to the dog park -- here she learned that other dogs were fun, people are really nice and pet you and even if they are wearing a hat they're still nice. You can encourage this by giving the "strangers" a treat to feed your puppy.

Then we progressed to downtown areas, playgrounds with children running around, stores like Home Depot, and walking near busy streets with lots of noise. Keep treats in your pocket and reinforce it when your pup explores new items. The key is patience and repeated exposure.

I'm proud to say that Bonny is now 8 months old and is a completely different dog -- you'd never know that she was so shy as a pup.

Finally the cat issue:

We kept our cat and the puppy completely separate for the first week and then slowly introduced them. The cat could only come into the "puppy" area when the puppy was in her crate, otherwise he just had to deal with the situation. Now the cat has a safe area that only he can go into when he doesn't want to be bugged by the puppy who loves to play with his tail and "bug" the cat.

Hope this helps!

There is a HUGE amount of information here on DK that was very helpful. You can use the "search" feature to help find things easily...
Hi Cheri:

Today I used her crate three times because I have to go back to work on Monday and will be away from the house from 7am to 2:30-3. My husband will be coming home on his lunch to walk Daisy so she'll have a short break during the day. I put her to bed at 9pm and get her up at 5:45am. Or earlier, if it;s light out. She doesn't love the crate and it's been harder and harder to get her to go in. She is always trying to escape, even if I use treats or throw in a toy. Once she's in and I hold her chest she's fine and she doesn't cry or bark. She also has a snuggle puppy in there everytime.

I just sent my husband out with pup and treats. There's a lot of noise in our neighborhood, but she's more afraid of people and kids then construction noise and she loves all dogs!

The cat situation will smooth itself out, it;s just too been short of time and we need another solution so no one's jumping over the boundary.

I'll be staying up late tonight checking out this site..I am so glad to have found it!

Thanks :)
Christine
Once your pup starts meeting lots of people and realizes that they won't hurt her, she'll do better! We were lucky to have some kids attending puppy class with their puppy and since Bonny learned that puppy class was fun, the kids that were there became fun too. Then meeting nice people at the park who fed her treats (that I supplied) and kids at the playground who did the same made it much better. Over time, like weeks of this almost every day, with lots of new places so she could see that people everywhere were nice and she lost her fear. Even now at 8 months she can still be a little skittish in new, noisy environments. My next practice ground for her is a local farmers market, or art show with lots of people.

By the way, I have never had a shy puppy like this one before, so I've had to learn all of this in the last few months. DK has been a great resource for me!
Christine,
There are so many suggestions for you I don't know where to start. Karen covered quite a bit. I'm going to go easy and tell you to freeze some baby carrot sticks and give those to her for teething. Also putting mashed potatoes in the kongs and freezing those helps too. The dogs will chew everything. They have to be supervised constantly. And yes, I would chew on the car too if you left me there unsupervised. You need to interact with her and she is missing a lot of physical interaction with her litter mates. Get on the floor and play with her. Do read over the puppy madness information. Dogs are tons of work, and puppies even more so, but the joy you get out of them, when they do "somewhat behave" is so worth it. Even now as mine are 3 and 2, they still get into mischief. If you aren't willing to say goodbye to some shoes, furniture corners, eyeglasses, wires and weird possessions maybe a pup may not be for you. Sorry to say that, and I love dogs and animals, but puppies are tons of work. Best of luck, Eva
Hi Eva:

I am okay with her destroying a few things, I wasn't mad. I was just feeling at the end of my rope because I feel like I am doing a lot, and things are only getting worse. I have totally changed my affection part in the last 10 minutes since I read the others' replies. I am kind of mad at hubby because he hasn't had a dog in years, but he assumes he's right and really he was wrong in this situation. Once I let him know about her bonding with us and becoming more confident he agreed that being somewhat more affectionate is important. I'm practically in tears, because she is missing her littermates and the family who had her and grew close to her before she came here. The poor thing! I am going to make it up to her.

More than likely she's teething so I will try your suggestions. However, she's had some soft bm's since she arrived. I'm not sure if it's the stress of flying and leaving her family, or the treats I've been giving her. Not too many but she may have a sensitive tummy. So, I am a litte uneasy about the mashed potatoes and such. Do you think that would be okay for a puppy with a sensitive stomach?

Thanks again for your pointers, I am so happy to have discovered this site!
Don't be surprised if your pup has giardia; many of these doodle puppies seem to have parasites of one kind or another. Watch the soft stools, and if it gets worse, have a fecal done.
Take an old washrag, soak it in water, wring it out really well, tie it into knots, and freeze it. Best teething toy for sore puppy gums.
Your puppy has lost everything she's ever known; her home, her littermates, every familiar sight, sound, and smell. She's in a strange place where nobody looks like her, she doesn't speak the language, and she doesn't know what is expected of her. She needs love, patience, understanding, attention, time, and affection. Unlike cats, dogs are social creatures that need attention, companionship, and physical affection to survive. I'm glad you're standing up to your DH on the affection issue.
Hi Christine,

Thanks for trusting us with your struggles. It's clear this is your first dog and some of these puppy antics are hard to get used to if you're not ready for them. They are, however, very very VERY normal. You might want to copy and paste this and post this in the MAIN forum as there may be other members with good ideas for things outside of the cat issue.

With regard to cats, while I don't have any myself, from what I've heard/read most pups and cats can learn to live together just fine even if they never become friends. The fact that at least one of your cats is ready to defend itself is a good thing...she'll probably teach puppy what his limits are. I wouldn't worry about anything terrible happening with the cat and dog in the same pen. Were the cats previously confined to very select areas or is this a new thing because puppy is here. I really don't think they NEED to be separated from the pup. If they have cat trees and other furniture that the puppy can't climb, they should be pretty limber and escape easily when they aren't comfortable. One thing that others have done is simply put up a baby gate with a cat door (for the cat's quick escape) or a small cat door in another area of the house. The cat can come and go but a dog can't fit through the opening.

Yes, as others have said puppies DO need constant supervision...unless they are crated. Some people are uncomfortable crating for long periods, but I personally used the crate as often as I needed to to survive puppyhood. As long as you also make sure to socialize puppy to the world, get her exercise, and take time for obedience and manners training through the day...puppy can be crated between those times. Puppy can be crated when you need to cook, clean, do laundry, run to Wal Mart, nap, or whatever. Of course don't leave her there for hours and hours on end, but you don't have to spend every waking moment entertaining her either. I took nearly a week off of work when my puppy came home 4 years ago and during that week I left him alone in his crate probably every day so he would be used to it. I would leave a kong full of his kibble meal with him so he had to work to get his meal.

Affection: DON'T worry about it. Be as cuddly as you want. As long as you're not carrying her everywhere, coddling her to death, and set boundaries and train her...affection is fine. It's the extreme of lots of lovey dovey with no boundaries or discipline that is a dangerous thing. And by discipline I'm just referring to setting limits and boundaries of behavior coupled with training and basically helping the puppy be a good citizen of your house and your community.

I think the most difficult road you've got ahead of you is shyness. Now, just being SHY is not a big deal...but fear of people might be. So you have a big job of socialization to do. That does not mean forcing her to accept petting. In fact don't force her to meet any creature she doesn't naturally want to. Your job is to help her feel okay in their presence and not freak out. Don't let others crowd her or add to her stress by being pushy if she's scared. If you have friends who can follow directions and come to the house and just hang out without engaging her...that's probably best. Maybe they can toss pieces of cheese her way without making eye contact...and then sit on the floor and put cheese next to them in a trail to invite her closer. But let HER lead the way. The more non-threatening and safe experiences she has meeting others the better.

Then as you take her to obedience classes...use what you learn and practice it in public until she is comfortable doing her exercises around other people. She may never be the type of dog who runs up to strangers wagging her tail...and that's okay. As long as her shyness doesn't escalate to aggression out of fear....you're fine.

RSS

 

 Support Doodle Kisses 


 

DK - Amazon Search Widget

© 2024   Created by Adina P.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service