Do You Have An Arch-Nemesis?? Fudge and Vern, Or Should I Say Laurie, Have Two!!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

I have had it with two creatures that share this earth with us. We walk everyday up at our nearby State Park and I have never killed (on purpose) an animal, but I am about to start packing (think Jane) like Elmer Fudd and start taking matters into my own hands. 

I am just not sure I can operate a weapon, hold poop bags, control two large dogs, and hit my target.  What has got my dander up?  Well, I will tell you! 

First of all, that park is loaded with geese and the main reason they seem to exist is to generate enough poop on the sidewalk, in the grass, and on any stationary object, that it forces humans to become nimble on their feet and hones our dog training techniques.  I am starting to wonder if every morning the head goose stands around and passes out Ex-Lax to make sure they have a very productive day.  We have all heard of a fleet of geese, and there is even a laxative called Fleet and if I worked in Marketing at the Fleet company, I would suggest their slogan be, "Makes you poop like a goose!" 

Possibly, the solution is to find the pill dispensing goose and either hand it a supply of poop bags or convince the goose that distributing Imodium capsules would allow her to live a longer life.

Yesterday, I was screaming, "Leave It!" so loudly at Fudge and Vern that I think I saw an old lady drop her purse. Our entire walk consists of me on high alert for evidence that some goose with an overactive digestive system has walked this path before and then convincing my dogs that leaving gross stuff alone would be in their best interest. I can tell you I see no let up with these goose pie dropping beasts because they are multiplying by the dozens.  Sure, the babies are cute, but it is just a matter of time before they get bigger and say to themselves, "this is as good as place as any," when the urge strikes and we all know that is somewhere on a sidewalk. 

Next up, we have the groundhog, or as I like to call them, the moving rodent from hell. This little guy serves one purpose and that is to come out once a year, either see his shadow or not, and predict the weather. 

The rest of the time he is digging holes big enough to swallow a human whole, or running from hole to hole while you are walking your dogs and trying to engage them in a game of Red Rover, Red Rover, Send Fudge and Vern Over.  He has no regard to the human attached to the other end of their leashes.  I am all for working with distractions, but fifty mounds of goose poop and fourteen groundhogs running willy-nilly would tax even Victoria Stillwell or Mother Teresa, especially since I strongly believe in another life, Fudge and Vern were hunting dogs.

So, I ask you, can anyone come up with one good reason why I shouldn't start carrying a rifle and put these creatures out of MY misery?  I will consider all suggestions, but don't bother bringing up the fact that I don't know how to shoot, have never hunted, and am prone to nervous tics.  I need valid reasons only.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

The funny thing is Vern and Fudge react to almost every living thing, but geese don't seem to get them worked up. It is just that darn poop. You are so lucky you do not have groundhogs. Vern runs into the screen door all the time....LOL!!

[Bonnie and Kona]

Who doesn't run into screen doors? This is not a Vern issue this is a screen door issue. Do I sound defensive?

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

LOL....Bonnie, Are you talking about someone we know??

[F, Calla & Luca]

The funny thing is I was wondering just yesterday, when the dooles met a tiny Yorkie, in the vets office, how they know a dog from another animal. This dog was much smaller than a woodchuck and they greeted her like an old friend. Or would they greet a woodchuck, on a leash in the same setting, in a friendly fashion. Sitting in a waiting room gives lots of time for idle speculation.

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

I don't know how they know a dog from another animal, but they do. When JD and I met a coyote, he knew that was not a dog.

Someone once brought a wolf hybrid to a GSD adoption day; the dogs knew immediately that it was not a dog, even with it being a close relative. It took the rescue director a few more seconds and a look in the mouth to verify what the dogs knew before the wolf even got within 10 feet of them.

Dogs are truly amazing.

[F, Calla & Luca]

They are. But what is different in the wolve's mouth? Do they have different dentition?

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

I'm not sure. I've been told the teeth are much bigger, but I don't know what else is different.

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Found this:

Despite the fact that wolves and dogs have the equivalent number of teeth, the  differentiation is definite. The teeth of wolves are adapted for hunt. Unlike  the dogs, the wolves have stronger molars, which help it to crush largest bones.  Wolves include specific teeth used for holding onto their prey. Dogs can feed on  dog food/kibble while wolves are carnivores and they need raw meat.
Read more: Difference Between Wolf and Dog | Difference Between | Wolf vs Dog http://www.differencebetween.net/science/nature/difference-between-...

[F, Calla & Luca]

Thanks Karen, I was busy with needlefish bones so this helped. DK is like going to a university : )

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Complete with the frat parties, lol.

[F, Calla & Luca]

Ha. And no tests although we do get corrected when necessary : )

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

F, You have some great dogs!! I guess they know a dog when they see one :)