My Least Favorite Things!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

No one has ever accused me of having a voice like an angel, or even like Julie Andrews in the movie, Sound of Music.  In fact, last Christmas my oldest daughter bought me a Karaoke machine and no one will help me set the thing up.  I begged again this Christmas and the two people who reside in this house with me told the two people who got to fly back to Oregon after Christmas to please not help me or else.  Even without my microphone, I sing everyday and I love to make up songs.  Usually, I belt them out in the morning while I am getting ready for the day.  This works well for me when it is just Fudge and Vern in the house, but on the weekends I have to sing through the pain of the audience all but throwing rotten tomatoes at me and heckling me with comments like, “will you please shut up…your voice is so shrill I think you just broke my eardrums…Hayley, check outside. Is there an animal dying?....God in heaven, make it stop.”   Oh well, all good artists know you have to keep working at your craft.  Well, last night the lyrics to my next song came to me while I was sleeping and I wanted to write them down before I forgot them.  Please feel free to sing them along with me to the tune of My Favorite Things from the Sound of Music.

 

My Least Favorite Things

 

Raindrops on muddy paws and poop bags and mittens

Bright yellow throw up and warm hissing kittens

Brown paper packages with urine samples inside

These are a few of dog things I abide

 

Cream colored messy dogs and crisp winter days

Walks in all weather and rough housing called play

Wild geese that fly above and taunt my poor dogs

Sometimes prompting my least favorite jogs

 

Dogs in all colors with their long golden tethers

Cause me to issue corrections and swear like a mother

Silver white snowballs that cling to their fur

These are a few of the things I endure

 

When the dogs fight

When the pee stains

When I want to cry

I simple remember I love these two dogs

And then I don’t ask myself “why?”

Feel free to add a stanza or two because singing really is a great stress reliever, even if you don't sound like Barbra Streisand.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

OMD...no squats for me and Karen squats sound bad.

[Leslie and Halas]

Is a burpee worse than a fartlek in terms of trying to describe a workout?

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Ok, I had to look up fartlek, too. This discussion is becoming quite educational. Now, to answer your question.  I will tell you the same thing I used to tell my high school History teacher....I don't know :)

[F, Calla & Luca]

Squats are part of a burpee It says and the part that would send me for instant knee replacement surgery I'm sure.

[Leslie and Halas]

Burpees, fartleks.  Don't even get me started on pee-ups.

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

F, your knees would be fine with my squats. Mine aren't done in prison and it didn't take them 80 years to become trendy, lol. 

[F, Calla & Luca]

Karen that would be miraculous since they are not fine now

[Leslie and Halas]

Fine, we'll stick to squats on the cruise.  Maybe we can Skype and you can train us from afar.  And by "train" I mean make fun of Laurie doing squats in her orange bikini while I do a few reps at a time in between mimosas.  Just kidding, I would never squat under the influence.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

I think I am just going to do Jumping Jacks :)

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

Laurie and Leslie, thank you for eliminating one of my New Year's resolutions - rejoining the gym.  Pee-ups??? LOL Finn's gonna have to be certified as a service dog first so I have something to hang on to after the second Burpee or whatever :)  Seriously, they make people who committed grand larceny or killed somebody do these as punishment...

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Leslie, ROTFL....squats under the influence.  Seriously, I can't squat in that bikini drunk or sober. It would cause those around me to pee-up or fartlek from laughing :)

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Cheryl, If I saved one person from the gym with this discussion, my work here is done :)