Sweet Puppy to Aggressive Psycho - Need Some Help Because Not Sure I Can Do This On My Own

[Ang Onorato]

Hi -

I brought home a 10 week old Goldendoodle on 12/30/12, she is now 17 weeks.   My friend got her "cousin" (different parents) from the same breeder and so far has had a very different experience than I have had.  Nikka is just a gorgeous dog.  Super snuggly but from the first few days and weeks I got her, a very very alpha / dominate / aggressive side has also come out in her.    This is a problem for me for many reasons:

First, because I am single and have a very demanding job and often have to travel, so I have an "army" of caretakers.  I have an overnight house sitter, a day dog walker, my sisters and parents who also help and a neighbor when needed.  I lost my 11 year old BFF pup last April and was able to travel etc with no issues b/c I had all this help but my old dog was also so easy with other dogs, cats, kids, seniors (my parents etc). 

I have taken on a huge financial commitment which I was prepared to do in order to help "build" the new puppy and give her everything she needs to learn and grow - yet be a safe and obedient family member.  I have installed a fence in my back yard, we go to puppy classes and I have a private in home trainer as well.  She goes to day care  2-3 days a week for socialization and loves it!  She does well there.

However, she has had numerous issues going after my sister and friend's dogs, a few dogs at the dog park, lunging and growling and has become extremely aggressive at times with me, my mom - and even the dog trainer, when we attempt to make her "drop it" and take something out of her mouth that she can not have.  I work to train her daily - 100s of time now since I got her to open her mouth, let me put my hands in her mouth etc.. but every once in awhile on a walk she will grab something - often harmful - that I try to take from her and she has gone ape sh&t on me!!!  She runs after me in the house often lunging and biting hard at the back of my legs - not just puppy playing either. I know the difference! 

She growls, shows her teeth, tightens her body, her eyes get crazy, she barks, lunges, bites, grabs on to my cuff of my jacket and wont let go.  She did it 3x to my mom last weekend when my mom was watching her when I had to go away and it really scared my mom!  Mom did what I told her to do - and what the trainer/breeder also advised to do.  Put her in a sit/down - even on her side, be very stern but calm with her, held her until she looks away passively. 

The biggest issues is the unpredictabliity of when she is going to snap at a person or another dog. She had been fine with my cat and now is loud and chasing him semi-aggressively when the cat tries to come downstairs. Now the cat wont go to the basement via his cat door to use the litter box and is going in my bathroom - so now I have a secondary problem resulting from Nikka's bad behavior. 

 It is like she is developing toy, treat and space resource guarding.. EVEN THOUGH I work every day to have her let me take her food, her treats etc. She has never had a guarding issue with humans but with dogs/cats etc. 

My friend's puppy is only a week older and has NEVER had any of these issues outside of normal puppy nipping/teething etc.   So I have been in tears on more than many occassions b/c I dont know what is "wrong" with my dog.  We can't even go to the dog park any more or around my friend's dog.  I have learned their may be some issue she just is not good around and I can make accomodations for that - some of  the little dogs bug her and its not her fault - so I recognize its not all her. But the very very aggressive "attacking' at me and others when removing something from her mouth - or her sudden turn on other dogs when playing is a big concern for me.  I have had the vet check out everything and I am keen to make sure she is not getting TOO much play time and just getting tired and cranky. 

I do not let her on the furniture yet so she can't think she is alpha, I work daily at training to make sure she knows all basic commands (she does) and we work on the alpha things like "leave it, drop it" etc when others things/distractions are around.

Basically I am doing EVERYTHING I can do  - at great cost, time and stress levels.   The problem is.. with her having issues with my sisters' dogs at the  moment, being aggressive with my 70 yr old mom - I hinders where and what I can do when I have to leave her.. and is a major issue especially with my job.  I have lots of help.. but at the moment - very few options b/c its unpredictable what she is going to do. I had to actually board her 2 nights last week b/c she was so agressive on the one day with my mom.  A few days later though..she was a dream for 4 days!!!!

My breeder says "some females are alpha but I have never had an  aggressive dog in 30 years.." Yeah Ok....

I was reading the other posts here and read some folks have experienced the same things - esp between the ages of 10-20 weeks. Which gave me SOME HOPE!!     I am HOPING she will grow out of this.. but if not.. and if she is this difficult and alpha and unpredictable - I may not be able to continue to provide her all the 24x7 strict training and etc she will need.  I only have 2 hands and 1 wallet and I am running out of options .. and time, energy and money. I can't conceive of finding a new home for her - but maybe a family that has more people to work harder with her is best, because at the moment I am just a huge stress ball and its effecting my job very bad, which I can't afford to get in trouble or lost my job ..b/c I KNOW what an awesome dog she is. She is SO smart and adorable and cuddly.. but I am at my wits end.

She has some great days in a row and then 1 or 2 horrible ones!  It IS getting better, I just dont' know how much more I can do on my own.  I just need some help...or some future reassurance this dog WILL grow out of it and I have not just adopted Cujo!!????

Any help is GREATLY appreciated!

 

P.S. I live in Philly so if there are any local folks who may be able to connect, I would love to meet some local Doodle owners too!

 

Thank you,

Angie

 

[Ang Onorato]

Thank you.... I have had dogs and puppies for over 20 years - with this job. That is not the issue. It is the extreme agressiveness I was just looking for to see if anyone else has experienced. I am not a bad puppy parent.  As I stated, I do puppy classes AND a personal trainer with only positive reinforcement - teaching calm and relaxing not alpha rolls. I never said that is how I dealt with it.   I am doing all of the things recommended..and I train her daily, I exercise her daily, I spend tons of time and socialization with her..daily.  As I said, she IS getting better.. but when it is bad, the aggression is bad. Was just looking if anyone else had a similar experience.

[Lucy & AnnaBelle's Mom]

I have to agree with everything that Sandy has said.  Although I think your heart is in the right place, I think that this whole situation is a disaster.  You lost your beloved wonderful dog and you wanted another.  I get that.  However, sometimes we just aren't in a position to raise a puppy.  It takes a lot of time and effort and most importantly consistency, particularly in the beginning.  You say your cousin has had a completely different experience, I'm guessing that the situation the dog was placed into was completely different as well.  While you are trying to take responsibility with training, private training, daycare, dog walkers, Mom, etc., this poor puppy must be so confused.  You claim you are working daily on training, but you aren't there daily.  The puppy is getting direction from so many different people it doesn't know if it is coming or going.  It doesn't have a clue who the boss is.  There is no possible way that every single person that is involved with this puppy at this point could be presenting a unified message.  Even if you say, if he does this, you do this, that isn't going to happen.  Heck that doesn't even happen with my DH and there are only two of us.   Your "Army" type of situation is just a disaster for this poor puppy!   Could we sit here and address each and everyone of these issues you are having, yes, do I think it would help, probably not.  Every time you took two steps forward, your schedule and travel would probably send you 3 steps backwards while the dog was with someone else.  It really is a tough situation ... 

[Ang Onorato]

Wow I am sorry I even put this post up.  I have been living with, rescuing and raising dogs - and one other puppy for the last 20 years.   I am not a first time or ignorant dog or puppy owner.  I was merely trying to lay out the scenarios.  The "army" of people do not raise this dog - I do!!!!  I am with her 24x7 until I have to go away for an overnight.  Everyone else IN her care have been involved in the training classes and private trainings in the home along WITH me and Nikka. She gets ONE consistent message from everyone - and she has turned on the trainer, my mom and my sister's dog.. all while in the company of each other and in doing the same training mechanims.  I do positive reinforcement - not alpha rolls.  It is not my job that is the problem.. wow am I sorry I even gave the backdrop. 

 

I read messages on here that others had the SAME ISSUES even with the dog living in a large family so I didn't think think this would be a judgement on why I have a puppy or my experience with dogs. I know..and do everything you all are recommending!  My trainer even said she is concerned b/c when doing the SAME TRAINING and consistent message and actions - the dog went after the trainer. The trainer says she is a difficult dog and needs constant work - WHICH I am giving her. 

So I was ONLY looking for others who may have had a similiar situtation and wondered if they grew out of it.  That is all!!  Yes, I am exhausted and frustrated - and I have seen others post on here the same thing. That is all I was looking for.   Not to be told that its a tragic situation for the puppy.  You all must have missed the part when I said she IS getting better.  I do travel.. but only3 days in the last 2.5 months - every other day I am home ALL DAY WORKING - so she is with me 24x7 not the army. If I gave that impression - not the case.  I merely mentioned the other caretakers b/c they are involved in mine - and her life - but all doing the same consistent thing.   Again, not a first time dog owner so I am aware of how that works.

 

Thanks for all the replies.. guess this was the wrong forum...

[Jill, Woody & Maxi]

I am sorry, I misinterpreted when you said you travel alot and have an overnight dog sitter.. I didn't think that meant you work from home! Whatever the case may be, as long as you are committed to her, that is all that matters. I can tell you from personal experience, the Woody did grow out of his stage, so stay strong and best of luck!

[Ang Onorato]

Jill..

I need to apologize. I didn't communicate it all well and expected people to understand.  It is really my bad.  Thank you for coming back to thread.  I appreciate your words.  I just was having a bad morning and took it all too much as negative.  Sorry for that..

[Jill, Woody & Maxi]

Thank you...I understand.. Stay strong! And DK has a ton of great info and people on here! Best of luck to you!

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

I'm trying to figure out if you are discribing a puppy- the biting crazy stage OR your dog is a naturally Aggressive dog.
These are not the same thing!
First, what does your trainer say?
If its a puppy thing, this passes, normal, and they all go crazy at this age. Just because you have one friend not going through this. I hate to say, your friends good dog is the one acting out of character. Puppies go crazy at this age and bite constantly. It's a bit early to have the commands she has learned perfected. If she is beginning to display poor social responses to you, then you need to work closely with a trainer- now, not next month.
So again, what does your trainer say?

[Jill, Woody & Maxi]

I agree..you said you had a private trainer coming to house? what do they recommend? what type of training are you doing/using? Correction collar? treat based? It does sound like its a very confusing situation for your puppy to be in. We also went through a "psycho" puppy stage, but we were and still are VERY diligent with training, at home (daily), and in a group setting every week. Woody did grow out of it, but (not to pat ourselves on the back) it was because of our hard work and dedication. They are very smart and loving dogs, you just need to show them they way...

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

My thoughts are, this puppy needs to run and run and run, four times a day at least.
This is a fun age. You and your puppy go to the store and together pick out some fetch toys!
Every time she starts acting crazy, go outside and run her for 20 mins. A good hard game of all out fun.
Do not give any training commands until she is tired and calm enough to listen to your commands.
If you try these new commands without her exercise, you are setting each other up to fail.
So go play with that puppy every chance you get.
I don't care if it is 11pm, go play twenty minutes of hard running fetch.
Give two commands and go to bed.
I think you will find this will solve some of this energy( biting / aggression)
No tug of war- just let her get that ball and return. This way, with a ball in her mouth, her teeth are busy too.
Play hard. She needs it. A dog walker is good for potty breaks but won't cut into that energy level.

[Lori, Quincy & Frankie]

Good advice Joanne!  A tired puppy is a good puppy.  

[Ang Onorato]

Thanks Joanne.. and everyone.. I am going to start over again b/c although I was not expecting judgement and comments on why I even have a puppy.. vs the actual issue I was looking for help on, I realize it was my fault for putting too much info out there and it can be hard to understand the intent via an online post. I just thought it would help explain the full story. I sure did not expect a sh&t storm..so I got frustrated and upset.

So I take responsiblity for not communicating well. As I shared with some others here privately earlier today, myself and family has raised pit bulls, beagles, labs and dachsunds so we know what we are doing, I know what I am doing. But none of us have experienced this behavior in a young puppy before so I was just looking for similiar experiences. Just hoping to reinforce by staying consistent with what I am doing..which I am.. she will grow out of it.

Nikka is a happy ..and tired pup. She goes for 2 long walks with me each and every day. Doggie Day care 2-3x week, walks on the jersey shore, hikes along Kelly drive in Philly - some combo of alot of exercise every day. She is even learning to swim.. so I got the tired / happy puppy thing down. :) She goes to bed at the same time every night, eats at the same time and wakes up at the same time every night. Goes through our training sessions a few times a day - equally performed by me, and everyone else that helps care for her. She is not getting mixed messages. She is just part snarky poodle.. so was hoping to share that experience..that's all.

Just looking to meet others and share some experiences with on this site...so want to start over with a clean slate! I will be sure not to put too much out in the future and certainly not share things when I am just tired or frustrated.

Appreciate all the other positive comments and private message offers to help! Thank you!!

[Amy, Cubbie & Ollie]

How does she act at daycare?  have they complained about her behavior at all?  What size dogs do they have her with?