mean doodle

[Rebecca bratter]

Has anyone had their doodle suddenly decide they don't like you anymore.  I've always been Madiba's favorite and she's super attached to me.  Follows me everywhere and we always jog together.  Suddenly in the last few days she won't let me pet her and she just wants to be with her dad.  Her dad works from home and I leave every day but we've had the same routine since we've had her in May. Is this temporary?  I feel rejected, sob sob. My little girl suddenly is a daddy's girl.  We started crating her again at night, because she roams around too much but her dad puts her in the crate, for some reason she's mad at me.  Anyone else have a moody doodle?

[Rebecca bratter]

No my husband is not abusive at all, I hope I didn't exaggerate his behavior, he's sweet but he has a different side when it comes to children and dogs. I have two step children and he was tough love with them.  I have been telling him he is wrong in his approach, and that dogs don't learn from punishment.  He should know this from training school, I'm going to have the trainer talk to him.  We live in Arlington, VA so yes if you know any good trainers please recommend.  Right now we finished the training at fur get me not and now we are doing agility school at woofs. Thanks. 

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

I see you do go to training.  I am so sadden, as I believe you are too, with what is going on with the puppy and your husband.

Can you exercise you dog more?  Go outside and run with a ball for a time.  Go every hour and wear her down some. Burn off some energy.. You dog will act so much better in the home.

I'm saddened that you need to do all the work to keep the dog quiet so it does not get into trouble  :(    That is another sign of abuse. 

I'm trying to be very honest but kind here. I don't want you to become angry and leave.  I  am sincerely am concerned.

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

Yes, I did understand some of what you mentioned earlier as abuse.

I see that you do great stuff with your dog~ agility, training, daycare.  Those are all wonderful things~!

What I didn't like was the collar incident.

I also don't like that she is fearful and hiding. 

[Lori, Quincy & Frankie]

Oh dear-please work hard at making the environment puppy proof- even if you have to put your husband's stuff away for him.  

I would stop giving your pup old shoes to chew.  He can't be expected to know an old shoe from a good one-they are just shoes.  

I would get some bully sticks and let him chew on those.  I buy odor free from www.bestbullysticks.com - they alwasy have specials going on and are the cheapest.  But supervise and throw them out once they are small enough to be a choking hazard.  

I don't think your puppy is being mean to you on purpose-I think he might be confused and maybe even fearful if your husband is being too rough.  But you should encourage sits and other positive behavior in the home with reward based training-not tugging etc.  

Good luck.  

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

Yes.  Antlers are a great chew. They last for months and dogs like them for hours.

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

First of all, dogs don't decide that they're "mad at anyone".  That's basic.....they are not humans and they don't experience human emotions.  I'm not sure what you mean by this statement...." When my husband yells at her she runs to me and hides behind my legs, which I don't ask her to nor condone, but that's the pack order in our household".  What "Pack Order"?  Yelling is totally the wrong way to ever discipline a dog.  Of course the dog is hiding....they view a human yelling as unstable, clearly not a leader, and they want to avoid that.  As far as giving the dog old shoes and "rubber things" that you don't care about....all that does is confuse her.  ALL shoes and "non dog toys" need to be off limits.  She will never be able to differentiate.  I really think you need a great trainer and/or class way more than agility right now.  It sounds like you are "humanizing" her behavior which is really unfair to her and will only bring more problems going forward.  It sounds like you really love her and she sounds like a great Doodle girl....I wish you luck and please look for a great trainer. 

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

Yes, food sometimes and shoes sometimes, is sending the wrong message.  Thank you,  Jane

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

Teaching the simple command, DROP IT,  and LEAVE IT, would be a great way for the dog to learn that something is not theirs and to leave it alone  :)

You can see some nice videos of these lessons on Youtube.com since you are in between training.

I know you will benefit from these two additional commands 

[BG and Gavin]

You are doing some great things with the clicker training and the daycare and the exercise.  Like you said your husband is not training, but reacting in a frustrated way.  The best way to avoid reacting with frustration is having a solid plan.  Off the top of my head:

- let your husband know that doodles are part retriever and retrievers as a breed are know to explore the world with their mouths, many tend to be very mouthy as pups (mine was) and need to LEARN what is and what is not appropriate to chew

- make it a house rule that shoes are not left out (and like others say, you may have to pick up after your husband -ugh-)

- if the pup has something in her mouth she is not supposed to, switch it out with something she is allowed to chew, no words, no fanfare, just switch it out - they are smart and will catch on quickly what is what

- begin to train "place" so that during dinner, your pup goes to her place instead of being at your feet.  Our guy is four and he still is required to go to his bed in the living room while dinner is on

- besides the physical exercise do some mental exercises in the evening to wear her out (puppy push-up, hide and seek, nose work) inside the apartment

She is lucky that you love her so much and think so highly of her. If you continue to be her teacher, she will respect you - I think her lack of preference for you at this moment is just a blip.

 

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

Bless you, BG.  Such a great response

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

When dogs are uncertain about what someone or something might do, they pay a lot of attention to that person or thing. They keep an eye on it. They do a little "sucking up" to try to appease it, too. They can't relax or ignore that person or thing, because they are not sure what might provoke it to yell, hit, jump, or possibly harm them.

My point is that the person in a household that a dog pays the most attention to is not necessarily the person the dog "likes" the most. 

I'm not saying this is necessarily what is going on in your house, but it's something to think about. 

[Sally S Miles]

I don't think she likes you better, what you have is an adolescent - and she is confused.  Adolescence = a testing of her own power, strength and position within the pack.  Obviously she knows she is low man, trying to keep a balance, but she is stressed.   Think teenager - there you are.

"Sometimes" doesn't work with a dog - they think in absolutes - (like kids) and either they can or they can't do something & the results need consistency.  If you like to eat in the living room floor, fine - either crate your dog or teach her to wait patiently until you are done.  Patience is needed.    In our house we sit down to meals with dog at our feet and afterwards she gets a treat, not until all done - - as a pup she got her Kong with yogurt so as to enjoy the gathering.   Never a treat from the table - show her where she should wait - and it's going to take work on your part, lots of cold food - but there can be a peaceful meal ahead.

In our house she eats first,  has to hold her down stay while I tend to cats - again her position in the house - but has to wait for the grand finale.   Yelling only gets everyone's dander up and causes stress, stress makes the dog go deaf - no good for anyone.   Excellent opportunity for teaching the Down/Stay and increasing Wait. We have shoes all over the place, not a teeth mark on one - taught her they are not chew toys - although she will nap with her face in or on shoes.  We leave clothes in a pile, again - not a chew toy and only one casualty in a year. However without supervision they will chew anything, without supervision the crate is the best place.

The exercises done in class setting are worthless without follow up at home, constantly and consistently.  She has no idea what is expected of her - - get that across to her and she should be clearer on her position.  She needs to be clear in her position within the pack - needs to be clear as to her rules and expectations - right now she is a confused adolescent with a bit of a worry about her world..

Hiding? Or merely seeking a quiet retreat?  I think observation of this is in order -  Training is the start of teaching a dog to handle daily life, but the words "reactive stuff" make me cringe.   Poodles are highly sensitive - as are the Shepherds, so treat tenderly to avoid creating a reactive dog.

Simplicity = come, stay, sit, down, leave it, drop it, wait and these must be really solid prior to other commands. Not something they will learn in one class a week, the point is to teach her these behaviors are part of what is expected for her position in the pack.  Get her well exercised and rewarded, she will know what is expected of her and all will be happier. 

Often a female dog will bond with a man quicker - there is a reason for the common term 'daddy's girl' and it's ok for the most part - , can be swayed, but it's natural and normal.  A dog will bond with trainer. A dog will bond with whoever they spend the most time with. Most importantly though the dog will bond with who is in charge and that has to be established from the get go. When it comes to the pecking order of the pack, at no time does the dog get to be in charge and calm leadership is essential. Even when things mess up.

Five months old is too young for jogging, walking ok -