Most aggressive doodle ever with other dogs...we need help

[Kurt]

Lucy turns 2 in October this year.  I've posted before about her behavior with other dogs and unfortunately she is one dominate girl and it has become worse.  I have tried taking her to pet smart only to leave quickly as she wants to let every other dog know she's the dominate girl.  She cannot be trusted with other dogs at all.  I don't want to get rid of her but honestly I'm worried if she gets outside the fence god help the person with another dog. It's bad, really bad and just rips my heart out.  I thought and read prior to getting her that these dogs are the most loving, playful dogs ever and she is.  I didn't read any posts about them being out of control aggressive with other dogs.  I love her tremendously and want to help her but it's gotten to the point that either she's hardwired wrong or I have to put her on Medication or I say this with great sadness...put her down.   What do I do?  It kills me to write this being so honest.  I really love her dearly but am very worried if I don't do something now I will regret it later.  She is the smartest dog I've ever had. She is very loyal to me and our family.  I wouldn't trust adopting her out to someone else. I would feel like I just gave them a problem and being away from us the issues would only get worse.  I would also be tremendously sad knowing she wasn't with us and think about what she was doing or thinking all the time.  I really want to fix this problem. What do I do?  I live in Aurora, IL. and would like to meet with someone that could honestly help me/us.  I've got to help for her/me get this issue turned around.

Advice?... -Kurt

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Kurt, when you posted about this back in March, I gave you a link to a highly qualified veterinary behaviorist here in the Chicago suburbs. http://www.doodlekisses.com/forum/topics/goldendoodle-expert-in-dup...

Did you ever contact him? What have you tried since then? 

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

Yes, you need to be working with an extremely qualified trainer or a veterinary behaviorist.  You may never change her reactiveness, but you will gain strategies to help manage it.

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

Agreed-about the trainer

I have a different view to present to you. 

As for living with an aggressive dog, know you are not alone. So many do. Many, many of us here have dogs who dont like other dogs and/ or want humans or other dogs on their property.    You may have owned other dogs before that were not aggressive but many humans dont know any difference.  This is how they think dogs do act, want protection,  and accept this as normal behavior.  So, they live with, and make adjustments accordingly.  Hey, " Beware of Dog" signs are printed and sold in major chain stores for a reason, right.  People for centuries valued this behavior in dogs~  Watch Dog, Guard Dog, Protection.

I want to know if you think this is Protective Behavior or Aggression and the difference?

Here is an article about just that subject  

http://www.veterinarypartner.com/Content.plx?A=2019

Dogs are a species that protect their homes and their families and this could be considered by many as normal acceptable behavior.  Protective dog behavior usually appears very strong around two years of age. Many seek out the protection of dogs.    I caution though, that an owner of an aggressive dog, or any dog, needs to learn how to handle their dog to properly protect responsible way, keeping the dog safe and others entering your property.    By forming bonds with good training, dogs and humans have lived with this situation for centuries. .  

It all depends on how you view this situation and if you want to accept the fact that you probably wont be taking your dog into PetsMart, or a baseball game, or play at the park.  But you can live in your own home with your beautiful dog and play fetch, Just dont invite other dogs.  That's okay. Many of us here do just that.  You might be very surprised to know that many dogs you see here on DK and know, are aggressive protective in one form or another.  

You mention that you are worried about the fence as a primary issue.   A simple solution would be to secure the fence, put up a higher and better functioning fence. I dont know as I dont know your fence. 

You have a nice dog, that doesn't like other dogs.  I think that is OKAY.  You said it likes you and your family and it sounds like, from this discussion anyway, that she is doing a job dogs have been doing for centuries.  Loyal dogs do protect their family from what they feel is a threat.   We just have to make you comfortable and able to control her behavior in these situations so you both dont get into trouble.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Kurt, You are not alone. I have a beautiful Doodle that doesn't like most dogs. We did everything right. I socialized her early on with other dogs. She went to Doggie Daycare and the dog park, but something happened when we got our second dog, Vern. Fudge was protective of him and didn't want other dogs playing with them. I was devastated, but then my daughter said to me, "Mom, Fudge likes the dogs that matter to us,"....my daughter's dogs, the dog sitter's dogs, and Vern. She is the most loving and wonderful dog with us and I love her so much. So what, if she doesn't like other dogs. Our first dog, Hershey, never went to a dog park or a dog sitter or a doggie daycare, and got along with every dog she met. For me, I believe each dog comes with their own preferences and personalities. We got a dog that doesn't like all dogs. I can live with that. I am super vigilant on walks, etc. I don't let strange dogs walk up to us. Fudge doesn't go to romps or dog parks or Petsmart. Big deal. She loves us and we love her and I would never EVER think to put her down or get rid of her. I think Doodles are so over hyped as being the perfect dog that we forget they are just dogs. No super dog powers...no super dog qualities above and beyond all dogs....they are just dogs, that come with imperfections and good and bad traits, just like we do. Work with a trainer if it makes you feel better and learn how to better manage her around other dogs, but mostly accept Lucy with all her imperfections and focus on what you love about her. Good luck!

[F, Calla & Luca]

Great advice.

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

Thank you, Laurie.   

[Carol and Banjo]

Oh, Laurie.......You've said it all perfectly!  

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

Laurie, you are so right! 

[Lonnie & Libby Lu]

Very nicely said Laurie and absolutely right on!

[Theresa & Duncan]

This is a very good message. It's a reminder to love our doodles for what they are and to try and not get stuck on what they aren't. We'll said :)

[F, Calla & Luca]

What a lot of great advice everyone has offered.

[Leslie J]

When I was a child I used to have a Collie that would fight with any male dog he encountered. This was in the 70's when many people didn't neuter their male dogs. The male dogs would have "fights" and make a lot of noise and roll around with each other. They never drew blood. There was only one dog that drew blood in fights, and he was a former (disqualified) police dog. Chances are Lucy is the same- she may start fights but that doesn't mean she'll do any real harm. I wouldn't put her in situations where she'll encounter other dogs, but her behavior doesn't mean she's a ticking time bomb either. She sounds like she's a great dog- you just will have to make some accommodations for her. By the way, the collie I'm describing was one of the most amazing, sweet, smart dogs I have ever encountered in my life.