What Do You Think Of This?

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

A FB friend who is also a dog trainer shared this article about "kids and dogs".  I'd love to get thoughts on this.  To me it sounds like laying the groundwork and "self justification" for rehoming a dog who is no longer loved or valued now that there are kids.  This whole idea that dogs are expendable seems to be running rampant....I just don't get it.  http://www.slate.com/articles/life/family/2013/07/kids_and_dogs_if_...

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

IMO, Poor Velvel was a toy that this selfish and immature woman outgrew once her kids came along. I feel pretty sure she didn't love him even before she had children. 

[Ricki and Tara (doodle)]

Well said, Karen.

[Shoney & Ruby]

Wow, that is a heartbreaking article. I agree with her on how her parents felt when they got a dog---"They loved him like a dog should be loved until the day he died. He never got less cute to them. I never heard them yell, “GOD WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS UNDER FOOT?” They never regretted him."

Sad, that she regretted him when he has been their for the couple for so many years.

[Julie and Max]

It didn't really sound like she loved the kids that much either. 

I feel bad for that poor dog. :(

[Marie and Hoka]

Aargh!!! It is her I could drown/strangle. 

When my daughter was a baby, she was very colicky. My year old Elkhound, Valkyrie, was a wonderful dog. It often happened that my daughter would wake-up and scream for an hour if Valkyrie so much as dropped her bone on the wood floor. It wasn't the dog's fault. 

I STILL love Valkyrie with all my heart and miss her 20 years later. The baby was not her doing and she was so good.  Two years later when I was unexpectedly single I thanked my lucky stars to have her for company and protection. 

This lady is selfish and never fully loved the dog.

[BG and Gavin]

She would top the list of people I would least want to be in the same room as me!

Two women that I used to work with both gave up their dogs after they had children.  Nice, mature, well-behaved dogs.  I find it exceedingly difficult to make eye contact with them to this day lol.

[Becka]

Ugh, this woman is awful. I haven't read any of the comments but I would venture to guess that people are going to be all over her for this selfish, nasty attitude. It's not OK, and what's worse is that her children will probably grow up to have the same ugly attitude about pets as disposable family members.

[Lori, Winnie, Bob and Indie]

Seriously?!  I feel bad for her dog AND her husband- he probably gets treated the same way...

 

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

Allison Benedikt is a jerk!  Now that I have told you how I really feel  . .  . . .     She must have no organizational skills.  Perhaps we could put her in a box and ignore her because the kids would probably do just as well with a Nanny.  I wonder how she will treat her elderly parents when they need lots of care? Glad that I am not her parent.

I see choosing your kids to save from a burning building; re-homing a dog if, after you have tried everything (and I do mean everything) it is a danger to your kids or your mom or your grandma etc. She didn't say that the dog caused any problems or had behavior issues. Poop on the butt? - get a sani trim.  Velvel just wants to be loved. How hard is that?  So you can't walk him very often - he's a senior dog - all he wants is some love.  Once those kids are in bed - and little kids should be going to bed early - why can't he get some snuggles or grooming or in-house training?

[Ricki and Tara (doodle)]

Despicable human being.  I agree with others that she never loved the dog in the first place-he was just entertainment until something else came along. Her entire blog reeks of selfishness.  Wish this were an isolated case...:(

[Adina P]

As a frazzled mom who wishes she was as organized and as good of a housekeeper as others while trying to work from home and away from home, I read this as more of a sort of harsh venting humor than opening the door for rehoming. 

I thought I couldn't love Rosco more unless I gave birth to him...and I was right.  I do love my kids MORE.  Immeasurably more.  Indescribably more.  My dogs aren't going anywhere--but they did take a big back seat and get a lot less attention.   I think when we judge people for expressing unpopular feelings we can also run the risk of opening the door for rehoming.  Because then others will feel shame for their feelings and not even bother venting among dog lovers.  Without being willing to be vulnerable with their feelings, they won't come here to learn.  They will just re-home. 

Being a mom is THE hardest job I can imagine myself doing without feeling ever qualified for it.  I feel like I fall short in 90% of it.  I don't think anyone can read anything to fully prepare themselves for it.  You know those magnifying mirrors where you can see your skin up close and all your blemishes?  That's what parenting feels like at it's hardest.  Like the most terrifying close up mirror that magnifies my flaws.  It shows me the fullness of my selfishness, my impatience, etc.  And then I have to go right back to mothering the life I have that is not made in the same mold as another's.  Frankly, the advice to wait until after kids to have dogs may just be perfect advice for a lot of people.  I feel like I won the jackpot with my dogs because they have been relatively easy. 

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Funny, because I think it's sooo much easier to get the dogs first. Then, when the kids come, you have a mature, well-behaved, well-trained dog (IF you do it right, lol) and you avoid all that "the puppy nips the kids, the kids dropped x y and z on the floor and the puppy ate it," etc.

I had my first dog two and a half years before my first kid. There were never any problems. I admit that my dog received nowhere near the attention or time after the baby that she got before, but never for one second did I resent what time she did get or wish she wasn't there. I loved her. In many ways, she was my "first-born". It was a different kind of love than I felt for my DD, but it was love.

In a way, I'm glad the author of this article was at least honest about not loving the dog. Nothing galls me more than the hypocrisy of people who are looking to rehome a dog and start out with "We love her but..."and then a long story about not having enough time and the dog deserves more, like they are making this huge sacrifice for the dog's benefit. I'm no expert on love, but I know it when I see it, and that ain't it.