Time for medication for Stew. Need Advice & help please!

[Jess & Stewart]

We had a training session Monday night. Earlier that day, Stew went in crate in the morning, then busted out of it. He scratched at the doors until one unlocked, squeezed out one side, got partially stuck, then crate toppled over him and he managed to get out. Now yet another thing to traumatize him and make the anxiety WORSE!!!!

Trainer said Stew's behavior raises MANY red flags.

1) He  isn't motivated by what dogs are usually motivated by.

2) Unresponsive in general 70% of the time, aloof. Stands or lays down with head down, white of eyes staring up at you, not moving when you try to engage or get him to come to you. He does engage more with other people, but barely regards me. Although he does have periods of excitement, wiggles etc (when finally focused on play, seeing other people & dogs)

3) Guards very odd/weird objects that wouldn't normally be motivating to a dog to guard (vomit, a magnet that falls on the floor etc)

4)Unresponsiveness & guarding has developed in Stew's head as a "game"- what can I get and guard, how long do I need to sit/stay/stand for Jess to give up and not put me in crate, leave me be, not call me etc. 

I don' want to get raked over coals for this but I cried during the session and said all I wanted was a nice dog and I had first pick and why didn't I see that Stew would turn into Cujo and is he not able to be rehabbed and is he really, honestly a weird dog. Am I stuck with this for 10-13 more years where he HATES me and what did I do wrong. That I literally did EVERYTHING right (or I thought) from the beginning). He's not abused or hit, he gets everything he needs etc. 

Then Stew just looked so cute sitting and listening to us that I said "See, you lookso cute, handsome and playful now Stew, why aren';t you like that all the time?" The trainer said "It's good you see the good in Stew". I said 'no offense, but DO YOU?" All I do is stress over him and he doesn't seem to give a s***." Can he really turn around or is this really his behavior" To which he  said "well all dogs are different and Stew is just challenging. Which IMO, was totally not an answer as I'm clearly freaking out about him. 

Then said maybe we need to think of medication and gave me the name of someone, but caveat that the sessions are long, expensive and very clinical. That they aren't as concerned with certain behaviors like he is as the trainer. Then left it, that were not even trying to get him in the crate and will try to manage my apt by just getting it all behind closed doors (my small bathroom) until we figure out a soultion. 

Last night, my mom & I needed to leave and leave him. We left him out of the crate since we didnt want him hurting himself getting out. Shoved tons of stuff in bathroom, barricaded closet. He didnt bark as we left. Came home, the front door had paint scratched off, bedroom door open, closet door tried to open, scratch marks and paint off. 

What the heck can I do before I get meds and/or secure locks on my doors? Thankfully I'm off tomorrow. HELP!

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

So much wisdom in this response. 

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

Such wonderful and thoughtful advice.

[Rosemary (Ro) and Enzo]

Amen!

[Donna K & Quincy]

Julie, I think you are very wise, your thoughts mirror many of my own but you expressed them much kinder and gentler than I may have. Jess, I know this is not what you want to hear but maybe it's time to admit that you are more in love with the ideal of what a dog should be than you are in love with the precious puppy in your care. It's time to put Stew first and do what's best for him and ultimately in the end it will be best for both of you.. I'm sorry and wish only the best for both of you. We're sending you a virtual hug because I know you really are feeling a bit beat up right now. The intent here is not to hurt you but to help you see what you need to do and the strength to do it.

[Wendy and Myla]

What a great response! 

[Stella]

As the owner of a LD who is medicated for anxiety related issues. I can say, that in my dogs case, we certainly needed the medication to facilitate training. Chase had got to the point of such extreme anxiety that he panted, drooled, and sweated (sweaty foot prints all over the floor) through training sessions. Once the meds had kicked in, he was a different dog and all the obedience work I had done with him previously showed through - all of a sudden he could heel and hold a stay again!! Now, I definitely don't think that Stew is at the stage of needing medication. He needs a behavioural assessment and clear and consistent handling. But, for some dogs it is necessary for training to be successful.

[Jess & Stewart]

Thank you Stella for sharing your experience. Stew hasn't progressed to that point he doesn't seem to be that stressed about being alone.

[Julie, Eloise & Beasley]

Absolutely, I didn’t mean to imply that meds are never necessary to facilitate training or anything else. I understand that some dogs have difficulty simply even “being” without them. Jess’s last question in the original post about what she could do before she gets meds made it sound imminent, and that’s what my comment was directed at. And Jess, I’m glad you’ve clarified that he hasn’t progressed to that point yet.

[Stella]

Yep, Chase is a dog that was struggling with 'being'. It was very hard to see and to deal with. His behaviour was leading to serious fights between him and my other dog (a very well adjusted LD) and to be honest the meds were my last hope before I was going to have to consider euthanasia. He is by no means perfect, but he is a much happier dog now.

Jess, it doesn't sound like Stew is at the point where he needs meds, and the behaviourist will be the best person to tell you if he does or doesn't need them. But, there are a few discussions about them in the Health and Medical Issues Group if you want to check them out and learn more.

It sounds like Stew is being a bit of a stroppy teenager and needs some consistent training and handling to help him work out his role in your household! He needs to learn to respect you :)

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Julie, You said this perfectly!

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

I also think it's interesting and quite telling how many people think we're talking about a puppy here. If I'm not mistaken, Stew will be 2 years old in September. 

[Rosemary (Ro) and Enzo]

I think you are right ,Karen. I remember Jess getting Stew, not too long after Enzo arrived here.