Dominate Behavior With Just Me

[Discussing Labradoodles & Goldendoodles]

I have a 6 month old english doodle .... Tucker is a wonderful social puppy but he is a lot of work !! I started to think I drew the short stick and got the defective uncontrollable dog. Currently Tucker and I are in a match for leadership... he is very dominating towards me at times ... jumping at me, showing his teeth and placing his mouth and teeth on my arm ( not too hard ) but definitely trying to position his rank. Some days he is great other days he doesn't listen well. We have a trainer but he just seems to have a mind of his own ( the dog that is ) he just doesn't want to listen to me ... he is great when the trainer is around but the minute he is gone he will challenge my direction . Our dog is actually quite submissive and friendly with all people and other animals ...a very good companion, his attitude is just with me. I am the main caregiver so I can't step away from the situation.
He also loves to dig and eat trees - how does one elivate this problem - he just ate my husband dogwood right down to the soil....

I hear you need to be patient with doodles during the training period does anyone have advise? Can anyone suggest what may work with training a dog to come and walk beside you?

[The Berry Oaks Doodle Ranch]

Hi Marissa, just read your post and I thought you were talking about our Guinness who is just 4 1/2 months and I have the very same problem...but, my husband does not.And I also hav done all the little tricks to show him I should have leadership and so far this does not work for me either. So,along with you I will wait for a response from anothr member if you don't mind.

I just want to add that I too thought this adorable choc.doodle came from anothr litter..because his mother was a standard poodle and very lovable ,father is a F1b labradoodle and also very affectionate.

[Kim Williams]

Marissa,
I have a question for you. Do you allow Tucker to sleep with you? Sometimes, that is a problem My obedience teacher is retired, but still does phone consultations for a small fee. She is very well respected in the obedience field with several championship titles with her golden retrievers. Her web site is www.caninedevelopment.com. I really think Leah could lead you in the right direction. You have to fill out a phone consultation request on her website but then she will contact you.
Kim and Parris

[Renee]

I have been through this with Taffy. In fact for a while my daughter had more control over her than I did. I just was consistent and patient with the training and a lot of time outs. Taffy eventually stopped and has become more of the dog I had hoped for. She still has time outs here and there, but things are much better. Taffy is now 7months old.

[Renee]

Our trainer told us about time outs. We use her crate. You only keep them in for 3-5min., this is usually enough time to let them settle down. Taffy still loves her crate and goes in it on her own when she is tired. If you don't want to use the crate you can keep her attached to a long leash ( which I always do ). Then you can put the loop of the leash around the back side of a door handle close the door and they are then tethered to a time out spot. You still need to give them a toy or something to chew on while they are in a time out. This also works best if you can put them in a room you are not in. They really just want to be with us and our attention. Tucker will learn to behave if he wants to be with you.

[Mommy2Max]

Great post and question.

My Max also works quite hard at being the Alpha.

However, he is more dominant with my husband than myself. I know it's because my husband is at work all day so, he tends to be easy on Max when he gets home - wanting to enjoy the time together.

As I predicted, it's backfiring because when my husband walks through the door, Max jumps on him, tries to "hump" his leg, nips at his pants and socks - just an all around nudge! Max doesn't show aggression but, becomes a single minded pest. We are working hard at ignoring the behavior. As many know that can be difficult given they are our cute babies. Plus, Max is persistant as anything. He can go quite awhile yapping and whining to get my husband's undivided attenton.

~Danielle

[Adina P]

Getting sprayed by water and splashing in water or swimming are SO very different that dogs (who don't generalize well) shouldn't confuse the two. In fact ALL 3 of my dogs LOVE swimming and HATE baths. Go figure!

[Stella]

Things will get better!! You just have to be consistent and stick to your guns! Our labradoodle is now 15 months old and is a fantastic dog. But between seven and nine months he was horrible, after being a lovely younger puppy. He was worse with me than with my husband - jumping at me, biting me (I ended up carrying bitter apple with me and spraying it on myself!!), pulling on the leash, throwing tantrums in public (he would throw himself on the sidewalk and thrash around - very embarrasing!!), and generally challenging me all round. He was our first dog so I was despairing, and wondering if the rest of our lives together was going to be a continual battle. What really helped was going back to obediance classes so that we had new stuff to practice together, and being consistent. If I wanted him to do something I stuck with it until he did it. It was a hard two months, but so worth it in the end as through all that hard work he came out the other side a wonderful dog. I have no doubts that if I'd given in to him and not fought the battles to the end, then he would be ruling the house by now. We also did not let him on the furniture at all as a way of establishing ourselves above him in the pack ranking - if I wanted a snuggle, I would get down on the floor with him. We used time outs too, putting him in his crate for a few mintues and leaving the room, it gives both of you time to calm down. He will do everything he can to wind you up - it's what teenagers do!! If you can, try and give him more exercise than usual, if he is tired he has less energy to spend on beind bad!! Hope that this helps a bit.

[Stella]

Hartley was the first dog for both of us, he is very very smart and he totally took advantage of our inexperience!! We now also have a 13 week old puppy and I'm sure that we won't have the same problems with this one when he becomes a teenager. Through consistency and becoming more confident, I am definitely the boss in the house.... things actually improved with the dog when my husband finally accepted this too!!! Hartley came out the other side of 'teenagehood' such a wonderful boy, we are always getting complients from people who see us out and about on how well behaved he is, and I think that sticking with the training and going to classes really helped with that. Even if it was only so I could get moral support from other owners and Erin, our wonderful trainer. One thing she told us (invaluable advice) is never ever tell your dog to 'come' unless he is 100% certain to respond, ie: when he is on a leash or long line. If you ask him to and he has a choice, and he chooses not to come to you, he is leaning that he can get away with ignoring you and then this will translate to other commands too. If you want him, go and get him until you have a very reliable recall. Don't worry, you can see from all the replies that you are not the only one to be having troubles and as long as you stick with it, he will get through this 'phase'!!

[Denise, Winnie, and AngelAbby]

55# at 6 months??? WOW - you better get that biting stuff stopped - he's going to be one big boy!! I did the "grab the muzzle" thing too and in a firm voice, said "no bite!" Abby doesn't bite at all anymore. And I did, at one point a long time ago, grab her, roll her over, and got right in her face while holding the sides of her neck so she couldn't nip at me, and hollered NO!!! She knew then who the boss was - and it wasn't her. She still tests - like any kid does, from time to time. The biting tho is something I wasn't going to tolerate. Outside of hurting , I thot it was very disrespectful.
Each pup is different - with different temperaments. What works for 1 one dog won't necessarily work for another dog. It's all trial and error... we just hope we win in the end. LOLOL

[Adina P]

First, please know that nipping and jumping at THIS age does not mean the dog will get worse and worse nor does it mean he will be a nightmare once he's older.

Second, as nice and easy as "be a pack leader" and "act like an alpha" and "be calm and assertive" sound on TV--these aren't things that are natural to all of us humans when faced with a giant puppy jumping and biting at us. So don't feel bad about yourself or feel like a failure.

My Rosco who was a relatively mellow and low maintenance puppy would turn into a MONSTER several times a week sometimes even several times a day with ME ONLY. He left bruises, broke skin, tore clothes, and left me in tears more than once. He would look absolutely menacing in these moments and I was really worried I'd NEVER gain control of my dog. At 21 months he passed his Delta evaluation and became a registered Therapy Dog! So I know first hand that consistency and training WORKS---and it works FAR better than any 'alpha attitude' a person can fake.

For one thing trying your hardest to 'show' yourself as 'alpha' is not at all as amazing as training is. It doesn't teach a dog what "sit" or "come" or "stay" means nor does it teach a dog to "come" or "stay" or "sit" under various circumstances/distractions--only YOU can do that with daily training and hard work.

So, as far as coping with his current behavior I agree with "time outs" -- they don't work the same as with people...he doesn't go to his corner and 'think about" what he's done. He merely gets a chance to calm down. That's all. He also learns that his behavior determines his freedom. If he chooses to act like a lunatic (by biting, etc) then the consequence is he's gets stuck alone away from fun and attention. Some dogs can be reprimanded and they will back down...others find it to be a game. With my Rosco ANYTHING I did when he was acting like Cujo only riled him up more. Holding his muzzle made it worse, scruff shakes were a joke, saying a firm "NO" made him bark back. And boy when I tried that awful "alpha roll" I stressed both of us out immeasurably for 10 minutes (I didn't time it but I'm sure it was!) while he struggled and I sweated and didn't even 'win' the battle. So for Rosco nothing I did really helped...EXCEPT removing him or myself from the situation (to prevent further riling him up) AND daily training. When he reached 12 months or so the biting was virtually GONE. Now when he gets riled up, he runs to find a bone and starts chewing on it.

I cannot emphasize enough HOW wonderful hard work invested in training is. You get:

-- a well behaved dog!
-- a greater bond between you and your dog
-- mutual trust
-- mutual respect
-- did I mention a well behaved dog?

He's only 6 months...it's RARE for a 6 month old to be well behaved YET. Give it another 6 months of regular training and you'll see an amazing change! And it will gradually get better over the next 6 months too!

But in the meantime, some simple and harmless things you can do to establish the pack order is called "Nothing In Life is Free!" Do a google search for NILIF or the full phrase and you'll find LOTS of tips!

[LeAnn, Lucy & Rusty!!]

Well said!!! I completely, wholeheartedly AGREE!!

[LeAnn, Lucy & Rusty!!]

You've gotten lots of great advice.. here's my .02.. Lucy showed these tendencies at about 4 monthsI I had allowed a dog to do this to me before and was committed to changing MY behavior. It started with her doing 'food protection" with treats... growling at me.. snapping... The obedience trainer said if I didn't stop it then, I'd have a serious problem when she was grown.

I did timeouts for bad behavior (short leash on the doorknob), no sleeping with me, sit and stay while I fix food.... for two weeks I hand fed meals (so the pup understood that I controlled everything) and never left toys laying around - playtime was another treat that was only enjoyed with me.. (i did leave chewey things out)... I also started serious trick training and playing games to engage Lucy's intelligence. I honestly think this helped more than anything because she WANTED to please me... lightbulb moment..

I highly recommend getting with a person who can ID your behavior that's contributing to Tucker's dominance.. it's always the little things that we don't even think about.. like who goes out the door first - you or your dog?? Does the dog ride in the back seat or the front?? What does your dog "demand" you to do? I'm always struck by how someone else can pick out my behaviors in a minute but that I was blind to. Also, a book by Susan Garrett called Shaping Success who gives some fantastic ways to engage your dog, she has tons of games for you and your dog and at the same time establish you're the boss. (She's the one who suggests controlling food and toys). You can only order it from her website.

Don't give up... learn.. hold firm... have fun!! and Tucker will actually be happier knowing he doesn't have the responsibility of being the one on charge. The miracle is that you can do all this without choke collars, screaming or any negative behavior at all. Good Luck!