Doodle Dictionary

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

I found this and thought it was pretty cute (and VERY accurate).  Let's see if we can add to the list.....

 

Doggy Dictionary
LEASH: A strap which attaches to your collar, enabling you to lead
your person where you want him/her to go.

DOG BED: Any soft, clean surface, such as the white bedspread in the
guest room or the newly upholstered couch in the living room.

DROOL: A liquid which, when combined with sad eyes, forces humans to
give you their food. To do this properly you must sit as close as
you can and get the drool on the human.

SNIFF: A social custom used to greet other dogs, similar to the human
exchange of business cards.

GARBAGE CAN: A container which your neighbors put out once a week to
test your ingenuity. You must stand on your hind legs and try to push
the lid off with your nose. If you do it right you are rewarded with
margarine wrappers to shred, beef bones to consume and moldy crusts
of bread.

BICYCLES: Two-wheeled exercise machines, invented for dogs to control
body fat. To get maximum aerobic benefit, you must hide behind a bush
and dash out, bark loudly and run alongside for a few yards. The
person then swerves and falls into the bushes, and you prance away.

DEAFNESS: This is a malady which affects dogs when their person wants
them in and they want to stay out. Symptoms include staring blankly
at the person, then running in the opposite direction, or lying down.

THUNDER: This is a signal that the world is coming to an end. Humans
remain amazingly calm during thunderstorms, so it is necessary to
warn them of the danger by trembling uncontrollably, panting, rolling
your eyes wildly, and following at their heels.

WASTEBASKET: This is a dog toy filled with paper, envelopes, and old
candy wrappers. It is important to evenly distribute its contents
throughout the house before your person comes home.

BATH : If you find something especially good to roll in, humans get
jealous, and they use this degrading form of torture to get even.
Be sure to shake only when next to a person or a piece of furniture.

LEAN: Every good dog's response to the command "sit!," especially
if your person is dressed for an evening out. Incredibly effective
before black-tie events.

BUMP: The best way to get your human's attention when they are
drinking a fresh cup of coffee or tea.

GOOSE BUMP: A maneuver to use as a last resort when the regular
bump doesn't get the attention you require ... especially effective
when combined with the sniff. See above.

CHILDREN: Short humans of optimal petting height. Standing close to
one assures some good petting. When running, they are good to chase.
If they fall down, they are comfortable to sit on.

LOVE: A feeling of intense affection, given freely and without
restriction. The best way you can show your love is to wag your tail.
If you're lucky, a human will love you in return.

[Jane, Rooney & Stuart]

SQUIRREL:  An outside toy that you chase.  You find them unexpectedly and then the fun begins.  They are known for their speed and tree climbing abilities.  They smell interesting and will chatter back at you once out of your reach.  Unknown if batteries are required.

[Allyson, Peri & Taquito]

RABBIT:  Similar to a squirrel, but cannot climb trees.  You can find them coming out of holes in the ground.  They are especially easy to see because of their white, short, wiggly tail.  Be sure to chase them when you are walking your human.

 

 

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

TENNIS BALL: The greatest invention since sliced bread beef! A round, fuzzy globular object that bounces really high and feels really great in your mouth!  The most perfect dog toy ever! You can catch it, you can chew on it, you can catch it, you can chase it, you can catch it...well, you get the idea. The only thing better than a tennis ball would be a tennis ball that throws itself!

 

(Submitted by Jackdoodle)

[Allyson, Peri & Taquito]

Love it JD aka the LPO.  I like the mini tennis balls because I catch them midair.  Mom and dad said I have perfected this.

[Donna K & Quincy]

WHINE- A uniquely annoying sound that you make when you cannot reach that tennis ball, squirrel, rabbit or any dog that you meet while walking. Not to be confused with Wine, which is what makes your doodlemom yappy at Yappy Hour. By Quincy

[Nicky, Riley & Boris]

This is brilliant, I'm LOL here and the list goes on.... You've definitely started something....

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

LOOSE STOOLS:  A way to make your humans REALLY pay attention to you.  They love to talk about them, and can describe them in great detail.  They will often cook you special dinners and give you pumpkin and yogurt treats if you can manage to give them a nice loose stool.  Don't do it too often though, or they'll drag you to the vet.

[Lisa, Daisy & Dexter]

Ha ha - I am up in the middle of the night right now due to this!  Hopefully pumpkin in the morning will help end it.

[Dori & Rua]

Is the pumpkin for Daisy or you?  LOL

[Lisa, Daisy & Dexter]

So far it's Daisy only (4 trips out last night) but lack of sleep may throw me off too! ha ha

[Jennifer,Chloe & Myla]

Very funny!!! I was thinking that but you said it!

[Camilla and Darwin]

Love it!