My doodle's time was up. ;-(

[Mandy & Benny]

On Sunday night I lost my best friend, my Riley.  I was out of town for the weekend, Riley was staying with my parents while I was gone.  On Saturday he started throwing up and my dad noticed blood on his tail after he went to the bathroom.  They took him to the emergency vet and he was diagnosed with gastroenteritis.  They gave him flagyl, something for nausea, and a bolus of fluids.  The vet said if they wanted him to stay over night he could, but he believed Riley was okay to go home.  My parents took him back to their house.  I returned early Sunday afternoon to my little pal unable to stand or barely lift his head.  My usual greeting of a tail wag and a lick was nowhere to be seen.  The vet said he would be lethargic and probably wouldn't be eating or drinking much.  I got him to drink a little water while his head was laying on my lap.  He seemed to perk up a little, stood up, and walked upstairs to the main floor of the house.  I thought this was a good sign.  I lay next to him all afternoon, just petting him and giving him hugs.  He ate a few pieces of chicken and drank a little water.  I had to run out for a couple of hours but had no reason to think anything would happen while I was gone.  My parents were there and he was looking a little better.  After being gone for about an hour, they called to have me meet them at the emergency vet.  He had started bleeding from his behind quite a bit.  When they pulled into the lot I opened the back door of the car.  I saw his sweet face, his eyes open with little tears going down, and he wasn't breathing.  The vet rushed him inside but couldn't bring him back.  I was, and I'm still hysterical.  I can't forgive myself for leaving him when he needed me the most.  I'm just sick over it.  That dog was my child, the one I went home to.  Now I can't stand to be in my house.  He's everywhere there, except embraced in a hug from me.  Has anyone else had an experience like this where the dog was energetic, bouncing around, and healthy one day and then gone the next?  I asked the vet how this could have happened if they weren't terribly concerned the night before.  She said it could be anything- he could've gone into shock from the fluid and blood loss, his stomach could've twisted (he wasn't bloated though), or maybe he ate something that irritated his system, passed it, and then was sick from that.  In the xrays done the first night, there were no obstructions.  The vet only noticed excessive gas- and my dog was the greatest because he RARELY greeted us with a curious odor.  Besides a bit of inflammation, that was the only out of the ordinary thing they found.  I keep trying to put the pieces together, what I should have done differently, how I could have prevented this.  Any wise words you can share? 

[Pam & Trixie]

I am so sorry for your loss of Your Best Friend Riley.
My thoughts are with you.

Please know that you did everything you could.
You were a wonderful Mom & He knew that & loved you for it.

[Ricki and Tara (doodle)]

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss and heartache. I read your post the morning and can't stop thinking about you. Please believe that you did the best you could for Riley with the information you had available to you at the time. I know you want to try to make sense of all of this but sometimes life is just a crazy set of circumstances that never do make sense. I hope that eventually you will be able to find joy in the times you shared with Riley and the memories of these recent days will fade.

[Gail and Bailey]

Dear Mandy,

I am so sorry you have lost your sweet boy Riley.  I know the pain of this loss is unbearable.  You asked if anyone else had experienced such a sudden loss and if we had any wise words to share.  Four years ago my husband and I went out for breakfast on a Sunday morning and returned to find our beloved dog Marty had died.  We had no warning...he was happy and playful when we left...he had no illness that we knew of.....but there he was... lying peacefully and we thought he was sleeping.  He had died and we had no idea why. I was devastated that I was not with him when he passed!  Was there something I could have done to help him?  I agonized over it until a friend who works with the terminally ill told me something  that made me stop and wonder.  She said that many times when a person is close to death, he will wait until his loved ones are not present and then "let go" and pass. The feeling is that the one who is dying wants to spare the loved one from the pain of being present at the moment of death. Knowing how intuitive our dogs are, it is possible that they may do the same.  I hope you will find comfort in knowing you gave Riley comfort in his last hours as you lay next to him and that perhaps he chose to spare you at the end.  Again, I am so very sorry for your loss and my thoughts are with you!   

  

[Mandy & Benny]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your Marty!  What a sad horrible thing to happen.  I'm keeping your story in mind, my mother thinks that he was trying to spare them the night before- he went outside at about 4am and layed on the side of the house in 15 degree weather for close to an hour until my dad went outside and brought him in.  That wasn't a place he ever went.  He was on a line at the time because my parents don't have a fenced in yard, and they think that if he wasn't attached he would've gone then to be alone for the end. It breaks my heart that he stopped breathing 2-3 minutes before he got to the office, where I was anxiously waiting for him.  But maybe that's how it was supposed to be.  As much as I want to think that, I can't believe I wasn't there for him. I miss him..  

[Karen and Ruston]

I am so sorry for your loss.

[Lucy & AnnaBelle's Mom]

You are the only one that can give yourself permission to let go of the grief.  You know that Riley would just want you to be happy and honor the wonderful time that you had together.  Focus on the happy times and try and let go of the pain.  Our thoughts and prayers are with you!

[Allyson, Peri & Taquito]

I keep thinking of this and wanted you to know that you cannot feel guilty about this.  Riley knew how much you loved him and must have been so happy in your home.  Please just know it can happen to anyone and you may never have an answer. Many hugs coming your way. 

We have been doing work in our house this week and I had to send one dog to stay with the "grandparents" and the other to daycare.  The chihuahua has been at my parents all week and I am so lost without him - I miss him so.  I can only imagine your pain. 

[Ginny Nightingale]

My heart aches for you--how unimaginable this is--what a horror--I guess we can never know what they are feeling or how to help them--I am so sorry and hope that in time, you will heal and find another special dog to bask in the love you provide. RIP little Riley--we will all miss you.

[Judy Clark]

I am so sorry for your loss. It is such a heartbreak to lose
your pet. Doodles are the best!

[Anne & Mr. Haley]

I am so sorry to hear of your loss of sweet Riley.  I hope you find peace in the memories of the good times and the love you shared. 

[J and Riley (and Luna)]

I am so sorry - you are in our thoughts today.

[GBK]

Oh Mandy, this is so tragic, and I don't know what I would do in your place!  From what the vets said, there really was not much to be done, doesn't sound like they really knew what started this so suddenly.

You are in my thoughts and prayers, it is so sad that you lost Riley too soon, I am sorry!

Gina