Almost a 2 Doodle Family :(

[Hazel & Chester Wayte]

Over the Holidays, I was contacted by a local Dog Resort owner (She works with the SPCA) rescuing and helping rehome dogs. She had a 10 month old Female that was looking for a furever home. She knew Me as a doodle lover - as I hosted a Doodle Romp at her park last fall. She wanted me to reach out to my doodle network.

I talked to her about the puppy- her previous owners had found her aggressive. They didn't have time to give her the love and support,exercise and training she needed. They were going to Kijiji the dog or put her down! ..But the rescuer convinced them to let her rehome 'Blossom'.

I talked to my DH - he has allergies ,We don't have any children.  Chester is 19 months and gets along well with other dogs- he is very socialized. I had been considering a 2nd Doodle. (Boris and Auggie are giving me the puppy itch :). I was thinking that this could be fate- we could work  with this Puppy and give her a loving home. Chester would be a great older brother, and they would have companionship.

The rescuer offered her to us as on a trial- knowing the allergy situation and a bit about us.  She wanted us to keep her informed.

We were elated and picked her up. She was a sweet little girl similar coat and colours to Chester. weighed less then 50 Lbs. (Chester is at 83Lbs). 

I am not sure I introduced her well to the our home or to Chester. Chester is a big boy and she was a little intimidated. She was pretty timid often cowered when approached. She refused to come downstairs-  DH had to carry her down the stairs. She knows some commands-sit, leave it-  and we were doing more training. She would eat any and everything.. Chester being so picky this was an eyeopener.

We spent most of that first night trying to get to know her.  She would shy away from contact at first, but after a couple of hours started crawling up on DH, one paw at a time, getting some love.  Eventually she would climb up and sit on his lap, falling asleep in his arms.  We learned quickly that she barked insistently when she needed to go out for some business.  The only time we saw any sort of aggression was when she was guarding food/treats, or when she finally discovered toys, and Chester would come too close and she would snarl and snap at him, which we corrected each time. 

Chester didn't seem to know how to handle this new Doodle. He flinched every time she barked at him. He never reacted back.  I think he felt he was trying to protect us.

The first night was interesting.  She didn't seem to be used to being loved at all, and wasn't used to being on furniture or a bed.  We brought her onto the bed when it was time to sleep, and Chester came up to the bed as well.  This didn't go well at all, and led to Chester leaving and going out to the hall, and being very upset at the intrusion.  At this point DH took her into the spare bedroom, closed the door, and she slept on/next to him all night, content, while Chester kept watch, with his nose out of joint.

During the next day, DH's allergies were in full swing, he had to wash his hands/face constantly, and the dogs were just not happy together inside the house.  It was snowing fairly heavily, and with both dogs angling for our attention, we were constantly going in and out of the house on walks, etc.  At one point we tried taking both of them out, and for the first time, they romped together, played together, and enjoyed each other's company in the fresh snow. 

We figured we had turned a corner in the doodle relationship, but once we all came back in, Blossom continued not being comfortable, and Chester continued being really out of sorts, unable to relax.  DH and I had an all day conversation on what to do, as we just didn't feel comfortable leaving them alone together when we returned to work full time in a couple of days, as well as DH's allergic reaction (yes, maybe that would get better, or maybe one dog is all he can handle..).  In the end, the tearful decision was made, that although we could tell she was happy, possibly for the first time in her life, and we enjoyed giving her the love she deserved, that we had to return her to the resort and let someone else give her the furever home she truly deserves.  We had already been alerting the local doodle community and both we and the resort owners are overwhelmed with the responses, and all the great possible homes for this sweet little girl. 

The decision made, our hearts broken, we continued on throughout the day, spending as much time with her as we could, as due to the storm, we couldn't return her until the next morning.  During a walk with DH, she played with a couple of neighbourhood kids, and was great with them, but on the way back, we saw the first sign of the "uncontrollableness" that the original owners mentioned.  Essentially because she wasn't done playing, but had to go home, she started jumping, and pulling on DH's gloves and jacket.  This is no big deal at all, and will just take some time to correct, its such a shame that no one had put in the love and time needed up to this point.

The rest of the evening was spent with Chester completely upset at the attention she was getting, and us feeling like complete failures.  We have so much love to give, but Blossom just wasn't the right second doodle for us, at this time.  She needed more time than we could give, and we didn't want to have Chester feel uncomfortable in his own home.  He is our little boy, and has given us so much love in return...  We were both a mess the rest of the night.

We again slept apart, each with a doodle, and got up early the next morning, barely containing the tears as we took her back to the resort.  The 30 minute drive seemed to take hours.  We both lost it when we turned her over, and saw her look at us, wondering why she had to go back into the play area without us.  Getting back to the car, we broke down, and cuddled with Chester, who was immediately relaxed and back to his normal, goofy, loving self.

We are keeping in touch with the owner of the resort, and will find out what happens with Blossom.  We have spent the last 2 days feeling very guilty, feeling like we failed her.  We know she will be well loved and cared for by her new parents, but we know that given different circumstances, we could have had a sweet little girl in our lives.

This has been a very emotional holiday for us overall, including a death in the family.  We know in the end we did the right thing for us, and for Chester, but still keep Blossom in our hearts, and still have moments through the day where we wonder, what if.

I was hoping to be reaching out to the DK community for tips on adding a second doodle and ways to integrate a rescue. Perhaps it would be different if it was a new puppy or perhaps giving them a few more days together so they could work out their places in the 'pack'.

[Lucy & AnnaBelle's Mom]

So sorry to hear that things did not work out for Blossom and your family.  I know that we had issues with Lucy when we were fostering.  Every time there is a dog in our home she starts guarding me.  She even did this today when we were at my brother's house with their little Maltese  I though that she was going to be ok since we were at our house, but I was sitting there holding Reagan and Lucy came over and sat down beside me and just started growling.  I've had fosters for up to 3 weeks and there was only one dog that Lucy tolerated even a little bit.  She wasn't real happy with that one, but was a little better than the others.  I've always wondered if given a little more time if she would have come around.  However, might have been a little more difficult getting around your DH's allergy issues.

[BG and Gavin]

Hazel - what a emotional journey (however brief) you and your DH have been on.  I thank you so much for writing about it in a very frank way.  We all would like to be super-heroes and fill our home with doodles, but we must be realistic about the "fit" for our lives and for theirs.  Jarka has been frank about the changes in their home since adding another doodle to their pack and I think that everyone needs to hear its not all wine and roses.  Sometimes it is easy peasy and sometimes its a real challenge.  We do love them all, no mistaking that.  I am lucky, because I have certain knowledge that we would only ever be a one-doodle family which keeps me from wondering what if... 

My mom would say "every pot has a lid."  I am sorry that Blossom was not your lid.  Hugs to you and your DH and Chester.