Being Sick with Doodles!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

For the past two weeks I have been sick.  I hate being sick and I especially hated being sick when my children were young.  When you are a mother, you don’t get to call in sick when you are sick.  Most of the time you still have to tend the children and pray naptime comes around soon so you can rest your weary and throbbing head.  I don’t think there is anything worse than being sick and not being able to be sick. When we both worked we made a pact on the weekends and traded off who got up with the kids on Saturday and Sunday. One weekend was my weekend and the next would be John’s and God help anyone who got sick on the other’s weekend, because frankly, John could have coughed up a lung and handed it to me and at the first sound of little feet coming into our room, I would have said, “don’t forget to put your lung in the refrigerator when you get up with the children.”  I swear the few times I did get sick, as he sensed most of the work was going to fall on his shoulders, he would start to cough and sniffle and say he felt like he was getting sick, too.  This just infuriated me and I would always yell, “I said I was sick first,” as if saying it first provided me with immunity from watching the children.

Now, I have two Doodles who depend on me for daily walks.  Fudge would probably be fine sleeping by my side, but not Vern.  Vern is what I like to call a cat napper.  Sleep comes almost secondary to any other activity for Vern and he prefers to fill his day and sometimes, his nights, with activities. He can be a busy bee and will let you know when he has had just about enough of sitting around doing nothing.   Many of you might say, “just ignore him and he will go away,” and to those folks, I say, “yes, he goes away, but he keeps coming back!”  I learned long ago I can fight the process and ignore him and pay for it all night, or I can rise up, shoot the rest of the people around me seething looks, and give in to Vern’s demands and by demands, I mean those sweet eyes and wet nose that cry out, “do you have any idea how much longer you will be sick?” My only other choice is to barter with the people around me, but when you are coughing, gagging, and blowing your nose incessantly, it is hard to sound sexy when you say to your husband, “I will give you some of this later, if you take Vern for his walk.” In fact, the last time I said it, John said, “I will walk Vern, but only if you promise to keep all that to yourself later.” Hey, whatever works, is what I say.

Please, someone help me!  Mom is a bigger pushover!

 

I did finally get some relief last Saturday when I took some medicine and woke up about six hours later.  It seems in my delirious state, I forgot to read the part on the label where it said, “may cause drowsiness!” 

Luckily, for me, it seems if you are in a state of unconsciousness, you are able to forget that your dogs may be suffering without food or water, dishes are piling up, laundry is backing up, and the other two occupants of the house are scratching their heads and probably saying to each other, “are we supposed to take the dogs out more than once a day?”  I can also tell you sick people are not happy and funny comments can go unappreciated.  When I told John that the medicine I took caused my sleeping all afternoon, he wanted to know if the label also said it caused bitchiness. At one point, I was hacking and coughing so much, it made me dizzy and I yelled out, “I think I see a white light,” and John said, “We will be fine without you, honey!  Go towards the light,” and then seemed disappointed when I said, “No, you idiot, turn off the overhead light.” 

The one time I said I might feel better if someone could give me a hug, I watched Hayley and John play Rock, Paper, Scissors, and heard Hayley cry out, “crap, I just lost and now I have to hug her and she looks gross.”  Also, when someone says to a sick person, “I can’t find our thermometer. Do you mind if I use Fudge and Vern’s to take your temperature?” do not be surprised if the sick person tells you where she would like to stick that thermometer. Finally, sick people like to know someone is checking on them occasionally and if that means I have to follow John outside, where he was working on the deer fencing, to let him know I am still not feeling any better, do not say, “I wonder if a shower and deodorant would help.”

I was hoping at least on the weekend, Hayley would be able to pick up some of the slack, but she was absolutely no help. I forbid her to go to work one day and stay home and take care of Fudge, Vern, and me, and she ran out the door knowing full well I could choke on my own phlegm trying to chase her car down the driveway.

She promised me on Thursday, she would be at my service for the weekend and conveniently arrived home from work on Friday sick and by Saturday was doing her best slug imitation on the living room couch.  She did manage to rally long enough to yell, “like a rat’s nest,” when I asked how my hair looked as I was getting ready to walk out the door with the dogs.  John was much more diplomatic when he added, “same as always.”

Well, as I was walking the dogs and hacking along the pathway, I came up with a solution for any future sick dates. I decided from now on when I am sick if any other member of my family claims to be sick, we are going to have a Survivor type series of challenges and the loser handles the dog walks and chores and the winner gets to go to bed.  I can see it all so clearly in my head…..Survivor with a little Sickest Winner thrown in for more drama.  Weigh in could be done with the contestants in the outfit they have had on since they got sick because they are too sick to change.  Anybody who looks or smells good is automatically suspect. Challenges could be as simple as who blew their nose the most times in a minute, compare noses and the reddest one wins that round, the number of times you make people around you yell, “God bless you and stop that infernal coughing and sneezing.” If none of that works and I am not declared The Sickest Winner, I plan on either shaking the hand of the winner right after I have sneezed all over my hand or exaggerating my drawn out congratulations as close as I can to their noses, so they are immediately overcome by my sick breath.   I don’t know what all this proves, but hopefully, it will make me feel a little better.

[Camilla and Darwin]

Ha, such a hilarious post! On a serious note though - I hope you are feeling better because that sounds miserable!!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Lynda, Fudge is like that...she would be happy to stay beside me all day and it really does comfort me. She is my best nurse. Hondo sounds like he was a truly special dog. Vern is very loving, but he still wants his walks :)

Thanks, Sue. Bella and Vern should never meet.....LOL!! They would be trouble together. Fudge is like Murphy and she would be fine with a few ball tosses and back in the house. I guess we would get bored if both of our Doodles were exactly the same :)

[Lynda Kamrath]

Sorry you have been sick, and you don't have the sympathy you deserve!  Hondo was my best buddy when I was sick and would sneak quietly into bed and lie down beside me.  He would stay there for days if necessary.  Then when he was sick, he would do the same thing - climb very quietly into bed and lie beside me.  If he was in bed, I knew he was sick (unless I was sick).  What a pal!  No other dog has ever been that caring (at least not one of mine).

[Sue, Murphy and Bella ()*o*()]

Hope you are feeling better, both Laurie and Jennifer. Bella is very much like Vern and acts more like a cat on a hot tin roof than a cat napper. Up-down, up - down. Turn around, flip form one side to another, scratch this, lick that and then jump up on me and stare! This goes on and on until someone gets up. It's been known to happen at 2:00 AM or anytime really. I don't know how many times a day we say "lay down Bella"
Murphy, well, we have to coax him off the couch or bed. He's always been pretty mellow. There are many days t hey don't get to go for a walk and we spend time out in the back yard and that seems to be enough most of the time. But Bella could certainly use several walks a day to tire her out. Well, maybe 3 or 4 walks might do it.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Jennifer, I wish you could send them to my house. I could keep them busy for months :) LOL They love you!

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

OMD That's so perfect!

[Jennifer and Jack]

Cheryl I swear Jack has a jogging stroller..believe it or not when I first got him I was able to slightly jog and he sat in it!!!! lol!!!

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

LOL Laurie I'm glad you're feeling better.

Jennifer, you crack me up.  Maybe Jack needs one of those doggie strollers so he can ride while they run when your parents come to visit :)

[Jennifer and Jack]

I have closet system...I did see on pintrist an idea of using a shoe holder in your food pantry door to organize your spices and packets of stuff but that will only take a few minutes especially since they already cleaned and organized the food pantry .....keep,thinking....lol

[Bonnie and Kona]

Jennifer, I have closet system on my dream list. Maybe your dad could hook you up. I'll keep thinking. ;o)