Slightly Depressed Doodle Mom

[Jane, Rooney & Stuart]

Where have I gone so wrong?  I feel like a total failure at this dog training stuff.  Stuart is out of control at the moment and despite my best efforts seems to be getting worse.  I want need Stuart to not jump into the pool whenever the mood strikes him, it needs to be invitation only as he picks the absolute worst time to drive in.  He goes berserk whenever he sees another dog or a human, jumping for joy - he will be 6 months soon could this be a stage?  He has started pulling on leash.  Rooney who is so very well behaved is losing his ability to keep a down stay due to Stuart's bad example.  Rooney walks around with dripping wet ears because Stuart is constantly licking them, what is up with that?  I'm having trouble handling them both at the same time.  I hang my head in shame as I know that it is I who is the problem.  Back to the "in home" sessions with the trainer but I think I'm losing the battle.   Then to top it off - someone didn't give mom the message that they had to go out and I woke up and then stepped in diarrhea on my dining room carpet.  Granted someone was sick but still.  I used the little green machine but I am going to have to round up some help and get the carpet out from under the 300 lb table (I just had to have that marble border - insert eye roll), roll it up, try to fit it in the puppy hauler 2011, drive it 30 miles to the rug store and have it sent off to be cleaned.  I'm so glad at this point that NONE of you live near me - so that no one can see how poorly I am doing at this.  I'm usually so upbeat but I just am so down in the dumps - haven't sent in any photos for the calendar - what is my problem?   :(

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

It is hard when the first one is so easy and the second one is normal, because we are totally unprepared for normal.  My daughter was just darling, very precocious in so many ways and just plain easy and fun.  Then I had my first son and I thought that something was wrong with both him and me!  In retrospect, he was just a more average guy except in the activity level department.  This sounds like Rooney and Stuart.

[shelly]

JANE, Honey!!! YOU are one of the BEST MOMMIES I know!  I think you are just feeling so overwhelmed because Rooney was SOOOOO extraordinarily GOOD!  Stuart is entering his teens and to me he sounds just like every other boy teen... poor Rooney tho', he's such a good sport!   I do know how you feel.... I always blame tori's poor behavior on me.  And now, since I have been doing more research I feel I slacked in getting more training help...(I'll blame it on DH - he's not home now any way- lol)......That's what we do - we are fixers by nature and when it takes us longer to 'fix' something... we take it to heart... And may I remind YOU - you have ONE HUGE HEART!  Isn't that how you got yourself into this situation????.....

NOW COME ON!  CHIN UP!  Put on those BIG GIRL PANTIES and forge forward!  YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!  Be tough, and follow through.  You may be exhausted but we ALL have faith in you, girlfriend!  YOU ARE "JANE"!  of the famous "JANE, ROONEY and STUART"!

There - pep talk over!  XXX {{{HUGS}}}

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Hang in there, Jane! We all have days like that. This too shall pass. You'll regroup and address the issues one by one, and everything will work out.

Stuart is going to grow up very fast, and I'm willing to bet that not only will you laugh when look back on this period, you may actually feel nostalgic for it. They're babies for such a short time.

Hugs to you and your boys from me and mine.

[Lisa, Daisy & Dexter]

Jane....don't get down, it's just a phase. Remember everything in life is cyclical...tomorrow they will both do everything right and you will be patting yourself on the back.

HUGS

[Rose Ann and Amante]

I am there with you! Amante has reverted to peeing in house. I have gone back to the strict puppy crate regime we used in the beginning as well as confining him again. Were did I go wrong. I am so upset. I don't undrstand ! You are so right it is enough to depress you! I was hoping he would be ringing the bell by now and no accidents. How old is he going to be before I can count on him Holding it? I probably should stop leaving the water bowl out too!!

[Jane, Rooney & Stuart]

@Doris - yes a hug would help so hurry!!!  :)

[Lynn D.]

Echo was a handful at the age! Up to that point, I had been doing all the training myself after reading 8 different dog training books (3 by the same group). One thing I figured out is that I needed a trainer who would come to my house, teach only me and go with my schedule. The other thing I learned was that Echo needs to be challenged big time! He is a smart dog and I was boring him to death. I bought new indoor distractions- the gross bones, himalayan chews, bully sticks and filling his kong with new things. Then I also started doing new things with him. I took him for swiming lessons, doing day care (in short bursts at first) and new walks. We walk every day for 1 mile but it is the same mile day after day. So we started walking around the lake in our town. This introduced him to new smells, new dogs, and new people. I think its the age and how we deal with it.

[Doris, Knox & Flash]

Would a great big hug help??  I'm on my way!!

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

Jane, you are one of the best Doodle Moms I know.  You give your boys the thing they need the most...your love.  Being with you and knowing they can trust you is what's important to them.  I think many times we on DK feel like "failures" when we read about some of the other Doodles.  I remember back to this time last year when I realized that Murphy was out of control.  I couldn't take him anywhere.  I was just mortified by his reactive behavior towards people and other dogs.  I was so embarrassed that I walked him only in deserted parking lots.  I wish I had saved some of the videos of him pulling, barking, growling and lunging.  Believe me you would feel so much better if you had a chance to view that "show".  I was pretty depressed during that time too because I was so afraid that things would never get better.  I kept saying to DH, "what's wrong with me...other Doodles don't have this problem.  I was convinced that I was doing something wrong or just not enough.   I started training, and at the beginning I felt like I wasn't making any progress, and then I started feeling even worse about myself.  At the same time he was going through his horrible stomach issues, so I got up to diarrhea most days.  I cleaned and cleaned...and became best friends with the Stanley Steemer guys.  I didn't want to replace the carpet then because I knew I had to solve the problem first.  That went on for months until we found the food solution. Thank heavens for the Food Group during this time...that support was so helpful.  More than once I thought....what have I done...this dog is too much for me.  The thing is I knew that I loved him so much, that I could never part with him.  That's when I got "obsessed" with finding the right trainer and method.  I tried lots of things before I landed with our current trainer.  He was able to give me the skills and confidence I needed to move forward with Murphy.  So, first of all try to get out of "the dumps" and know that you are loving and capable...and Stuart WILL be the dog you need him to be.  Then I'd say try to find the "right trainer" for you.  It needs to be someone who will go places with you, Stuart and Rooney and show you what you should be doing.  It should also be someone who can challenge you, but also make you know that you "have what it takes".  You should feel better and better about yourself and Stuart after each training session....if you don't it's the wrong trainer.  Please know that you have so many friends here on DK who really care about you and will be here for you.  You WILL live through this stage!

[BG and Gavin]

Sounds like a bad day Jane.  Keep the faith, you will get through it.  These doods can be a handful by times, especially that young and especially having two.  Get your stuff done, crate the boys and have a glass of wine.  If you remain consistent things will improve. :)