The New Dog Hair Dryer and Fudge and Vern's Day at the Spa!!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

It started with a whiff.  I smelled something strong and unpleasant in the air and after double-checking that I hadn’t forgotten to apply my deodorant, I started focusing on the most likely suspect, Vern.  I was sure it was Vern, but he didn’t smell any worse than usual, so next up was Fudge.  At last, I located the smell and sure enough, it was Fudge. The only explanation that I can think of why my clean Fudge ended up smelling badly was that maybe Vern rolled over on her one night while she was sleeping.  Since Vern keeps getting ticks, I knew that if Fudge got a bath, so would Vern. I kept debating whether or not I should call the groomer, but finally decided I could give both dogs a bath and save the money.

 

For Christmas, my husband bought me the mother of all dog hair dryers.  I honestly think it is strong enough to blow a small child into the air or clear a path through any debris. 

I would have to say the first setting would equal a Category 1 hurricane and the second setting needs to come with an advisory and a hurricane name.

Honestly, I don’t know how those Cover Girl models stay upright when the fans start blowing on them, because when I turned that dryer on myself to see how I looked as a sexy, windblown model, my daughter started laughing and said, “mom, all your loose skin is flapping all over the place.” 

I highly doubt Heidi Klum hears it put quite that way.

 

First things first, and I started with Vern, who is actually quite good about stepping into the tub on his own.  I washed him off, towel dried him as best as I could, and sent him to my husband and daughter for the blow-drying step in the grooming process.  Next, was Fudge.  Fudge is a little quicker than Vern in figuring out that water running in the tub means she is going to get a bath and she needed far more persuading than Vern did to get in that tub.  In fact, I had to lift her into the tub and put her in my best wrestling hold until she came around to my way of thinking. 

Thankfully, after a few seconds, she decided that warm water and scrubbing felt pretty good and she was great.  Once, the bath was over, I towel dried her and sent her out to the drying team.  Now, you know I try never to be critical of family members, but from here on out, I will be referring to the drying team as Tweedledee and Tweedledum.

When I got out to our foyer where the Tweedles had set up shop, poor Vern was hovering in a corner as Dee and Dum had the dryer on the Hurricane setting and were working feverishly to dry him. I quickly pointed out that the setting was too high and a good way to tell this in the future was to pay attention to his ears and if they were standing straight up on his head like a Jackrabbit’s, turn the dryer down. 

Dum can be a bit argumentative, and tried to justify the high setting by blaming it on the fact that Vern kept trying to escape.  Next, I tried to reason with them and told them if someone was drying your hair on a wind tunnel setting and it made you feel as if your eyes were being blown to the back of your head, you might not like it either, and they responded that they would like me to take the dryer and put it on the highest setting and do something with it that I was not sure I could physically achieve.  I did ask for a demonstration, but Dee and Dum declined.

Luckily, for Fudge, I took over the drying for her and Vern was able to make his getaway and leave Fudge at the mercy of the dryer. “Every man or dog for himself,” seemed to be Vern’s motto.  The Tweedles tried to argue their case again and stated that Vern was doing exactly what he had done for them by running to the living room and they continued to maintain that ganging up on a sweet, innocent dog, with a powerful piece of equipment, was warranted.  Once Vern saw the dryer was in the hands of a calmer, more patient individual, he did venture back into the foyer and I was able to continue drying him from afar.  Fudge, on the other hand, seemed to love the pampering and almost fell asleep while she was being dried and stroked.

After the drying was over, Vern jumped up on the couch with me for some hugs. 

The moral of this story is:  If you don’t want your dog to have PTDD (Post Traumatic Drying Disorder) hire better help!

 

Tweedledee and Tweedledum

Agreed to help with drying

For Tweedledum said Tweedledee

By herself, would start Vern crying

 

The dryer was turned up too high

Thinking it would be much quicker

They cared naught about ears or eyes

Causing all involved to bicker

 

They quickly proved that two parts

Does not always equal great sums

When it comes to calculating sense and smarts

And hereafter are known as Tweedledums

All is forgiven:

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Traci, They read the blogs and are really good sports...LOL!!! Thank you!

Sherri, LOL...I can send one Tweedle your way :) Sophie looks like a long legged, beautiful Doodle to me!

Thanks, Karen, Nicky,  and Jane!

Camilla, Darwin just has his own personality....he is a pip :) LOL

[Traci -Bexter & Maggie]

Your dogs look simply adorable!  Job well done!  Another hilarious blog!  I swear I do think Maggie & Vern are related!  They look a lot alike!  Awesome poem too!  I would assume your DH and daughter either are unaware of your stories about them OR they are great sports!

[Sherri, Sophie, Winston, & Kitty]

Oh Laurie how I love your blogs! What a hoot. But all I have to say is, be grateful for any help you get! I don't have any tweedles to give me a hand. Wait ... does that automatically make me the tweedle? Perhaps it does, judging by how short "skinny legs"Sophie had to be clipped today at the groomer.

I'm pretty sure Sophie thinks I'm Tweedle Dum!

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Aw, poor doodles! They are such good sports! And you are such a good doodle mom for rescuing them from the clutches of the Tweedle Ds!

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

I'm "lovin" that windblown look, Laurie!  As you know I have two Tweedles of my own....but they're the four legged variety.  Another really fun blog.

[Camilla and Darwin]

Laurie, he loves water and hates wind. LOL, he is a strange pup

[Nicky, Riley & Boris]

Great story and love that poem.  The Doodles look good after their wash and dry : )

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Thank you, Donna. I almost went with a Limerick...LOL! It usually is Vern when it comes to a smell :) Vern likes to give those bear hugs and he was not letting go the other day. Dumb and Dumber...LOL! I say that a lot around here. I am glad you showed Quincy some mercy!

Jarka, Thank you! He got me the Metro Air Force Master Blaster, Model MB-3.  I had to go see what it was called and cracked up at the Master Blaster...LOL! It really does dry them quickly.

F, Do I look less like Julia Roberts Child with my windblown hair? LOL I just find my Doodles stay wet ALL day and the wet smell gets to me. The dryer was quick.

Diane, Thank you so much!! I am glad I can make you laugh. Sometimes, I do laugh especially about my DH :)

BG, Vern and Gavin really do look like twins :) I think Gavin is thinner, however.

Camilla, Darwin does not mind water poured on his head, but he hates the force dryer....go figure...LOL!

[Donna K & Quincy]

Great poem!

[Donna K & Quincy]

Poor Vern, he gets blamed for everything. The doods do look spiffy after their bath but Vern looks as if he is expecting you to save him from Dumb and Dumber. The wind swept look is definitely one you can pull off. I don't have a doggie dryer but I did get the bright idea to reverse the air flow on the shop vac and use that as a dryer, it would have worked too if Quincy hadn't stood there shaking like a leaf. I took pity and gave it up, unlike some, I know when to quit. :>)