Sophie Update -- Where To Even Begin?

[Lucy & AnnaBelle's Mom]

As many of you already know, we have been working with the Vet for over a month now to try and figure out what was going on.  Many things were suggested, tested, and ruled out, to include Inflammatory Bladder Disease, Diabetes Insipidus, Addison’s, Cushings, Hyperparathyroidism, and I’m sure I’ve even missed something there.  Bottom line, the final test came back today and our worst fears have come true.  Sophie has been diagnosed with Lymphoma.  We have had a week to prepare ourselves for this diagnosis as Dr. Jenny told us when her calcium came back extremely high that she was going to be very surprised if it wasn’t lymphoma.  But, we wanted to wait for the tests, which I can say, take FOREVER!  It has been the longest week and a half of our lives.  For those who don’t know, which until last week I had no clue, in dogs, Lymphoma is an incurable, fatal disease.  We have been given basically three options.  One, we can opt against Chemo and just give her prednisone and expect maybe 2 months.  We can treat with chemo through our regular Vet or she will refer us to Cincinnati to Cancer specialists who will do further tests to pin point exactly what stage and where all it has spread, and then do chemo,  but the bottom line with chemo, whatever the mix,  or who does it,  it really doesn’t matter.  The best we can hope for is to get her into a remission; average time is 6 months before it appears again.  On the second go round you can hope for a remission of maybe ½ the length of the first one.  A small percentage of dogs make it for 2 years.  We have been making ourselves crazy the last week trying to remove our selfish motives from the equation and do what is best for Sophie.  We want her to have as many good days as absolutely possible, but we don’t want her to have them at the expense of an equal number of horribly sick days.    Right now I’m just so anxious to get the chemo and prednisone started as we are told pretty much as soon as it is started she will start to feel better.  The first round of Chemo will be once a week for 6 months, a combination of shots and pills.  Right now she is breaking my heart because she has no light in her eyes, she won’t eat, (in spite of all Karen’s wonderful suggestions for things to tempt her with) she just mainly sleeps.   I just want to see that spark in her eyes and happy little Sophie smile again.    Every time I have ever seen one of these awful posts I have always said to myself, I cannot even imagine being told this news.  There is just no way, how would I ever get through that.    I never dreamed that morning a month ago where she had peed on her bed that this is where we were going to end up.  It was supposed to just be a stupid UTI that some antibiotics were going to fix.  It has been a long, exhausting  month, but at least now we know and we just have to figure out how we are going to deal with it.   We will be meeting with Dr. Jenny tonight  to try and understand it all a little better and probably go ahead and start the chemo.   I thank all of you so much for continually asking about her and keeping her in your thoughts and prayers over the last month.   It means so much to us to know how much everyone cares about her.   I promise you that we will do everything we can to ensure the remainder of her time, whatever it may be, will be the best we can possibly give her.

[Lucy & AnnaBelle's Mom]

Thank you Deanna for sharing Dixie's story.  We do sincerely hope that Sophie will be one of the small percentage that makes it past the 2 year point.  The Vet feels like we caught it real early, so hopefully that will play into it. 

[Sue & Lily Grace]

Sherri, I am so very sorry that you had to hear those words. My heart is breaking for you all. I pray that the combination of meds will allow Sophie to feel better and I know that light will be in her eyes again. I will keep you all in my prayers. Give her lots of pets from me. Take care of yourself too. It is a hard road. God Bless.

[Linda And Loo]

I am so sorry to hear about Sophie's news. My heart aches for you! My prayers continue for Sophie and your family!

[Ricki and Tara (doodle)]

Sherri, I'm so shocked and saddened I don't know what to say right now. I wish I had some words for you that could help to ease the pain you are feeling. I know you have some tough times ahead and please remember your DK family is always here for you. I will be keeping all of you in prayer during this difficult time.  Hugs to you and Sophie.

[Donna K & Quincy]

Sherri, I am so, so, very sorry, I write this through tears for all of you. I know your heart is breaking, please know that we are with you. I am saying a prayer that Sophie starts to feel well and enjoys a long, long remission. I know no words will make this easier but know that we are sending prayers and hugs for you and Sophie.

[Adrianne Matzkin]

Oh Sherri, I am so so so sorry!! I wish I had a magic wand and I would walk if I had to do to change this. My heart breaks for you and Sophie and Lucy!! Lucy must be beside herself that her sister just isn't herself. 

Prayers and positive thoughts coming to you all!!

[Camilla and Darwin]

I am so, so sorry to hear this news. I know you will make the best decisions for sweet Sophie and I'm thinking of you all as you go through this.

[Lisa, Daisy & Dexter]

Oh Sherri, hearing this is so awful. My heart is truly broken for you and your family. Like you I can't imagine being on the other end of this news. You are not being selfish you just love her so much, you will do whatever is best for her as we all know.

Please know that I will continue praying and hoping that the time you have with Sophie will have light in her eyes and a smile on her face just like this photo.

When I think of Sophie I will most certainly think of her being that "good girl" standing at the tree looking at the bird.

[Nancie & Gracie Doodle]

I am so heart broken to be reading your discussion.  Memories are flooding back as if it was yesterday.  We had a black Lab mix who was diagnosed with Lymphoma at 11 years old.  He was our first dog and was totally bonded to my DH.  DH researched and researched all over the country trying to find a way to make it all go away.  He was ready to fly Rodney to where ever he had to.  We were told we had 30-60 days and during that time were were flying to Boston to meet our first grandson and also taking an Alaskan cruise that we did not buy insurance for.  There were no indications to us that Rodney had this horrible disease.  He was still his happy self and we knew that while we were traveling he would go downhill and the pet sitter would be the one to have to put him down.  We didn't want this for him or us.  So, we started the Chemo.  We bought him an extra month and it was not a pretty month at all.  He spent more time in the hospital than he did at home and it was heartbreaking to see how pitiful he looked when we would visit. His life was not quality at all. Because of the Chemo he also contracted a bacterial infection which was really taking him downhill.  We finally found an antibiotic that turned him around enough to come home.  At that point we had maybe a week or two of some amount of quality from him.  He let us know one evening that he needed to leave us and went out into the patio.  DH followed him out and wrapped his arms around Rodney, held him tight and whispered in his ear.  A sudden massive heart attack took him in that instant.  My DH was crying for days and still tears up after 8 years.  He blames himself for putting him through the Chemo for our own selfish reasons...just to buy another month so we could travel.  We said never again...but then possibly if it were a very young dog...who knows?  We also spent $10,000 all for nothing.  It was the worst time in our lives and I know exactly how you feel and what you are going through.  The decision has to be up to you and we all know we would do anything for our Doodles at whatever cost.  As you said in your post, you are trying to remove yourself from selfish motives.  That is really hard to do.  We were selfish with our decision for Rodney and have regretted it every day since.  But we are only one example.  I'm sure there are others that might have a success story but as you know there is no cure for Lymphoma and it is a fast acting disease.  I am reliving every moment right now and thinking of you and all the "what ifs" going on in your mind and heart.  There just really are no right or wrong answers.  No one can make them for you.  In the end you will do what you need to and know that you loved her and did the best you could.  I wish I could give you a big hug right now.  We all pray that this horrible decision never knocks on our door!

[Lucy & AnnaBelle's Mom]

Supposedly the chemo protocol that Dr. Jenny will be using has few to minimal side effects.  Not at all like the treatments that many people get.  All of that is factored into our decisions, as we don't want her suffering just to get more time.  So, hopefully she will do well with the chemo and be able to continue on it.  Dr. Jenny's philosophy fits right with ours as it looking at it from the perspective of what is best for Sophie. 

[Bonnie and Kona]

I am so glad sweet Sophie will not suffer with chemo. It sounds like you have an excellent vet. 

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

I am hoping that Sophie's being only 4 years old will also be a factor in her favor regarding how well she tolerates the chemo.