Dogs and Kids Lessons Learned #1

[jenn D]

Hi fellow doodle friends.

I've hesitated to post this for two weeks but its nagged at me so much I guess I felt the need to finally start a thread.

I know I've mentioned I've helped teach training classes in the past (for local obedience club) in the capacity of teaching KPT (puppy) and basic obedience and some basic agility. I'm extremely knowledgeable about beagles (my breed in young adulthood before doodles also all training was my 10 years prior to kids) and moderately knowledge about some basic dog behavior.

However until I got Brisby (our first doodle) I never really had kids and dogs in a household together. I wasn't a human mom and dog mom at the same time. I've set some serious rules for both human kids and my canine kiddos. Both in my opinion can randomly forget the rules. I have a 8 (almost 9 year old daughter) and a 5 year old child (son). Daughter is 1 year post treatment survivor of leukemia. Son has special needs-cerebral palsy and epilepsy.   The reason I am telling you this is that I am pretty overprotective of my kiddos due to medical issues. Anyway, Im pretty strict on the fact that the kids CANNOT treat the dogs like baby dolls, stuffed animal, etc. We have rules like no hugging them, no jumping on them, do not dress them up, etc. I know many of you will laugh at the last one but kids do all kinds of crazy things.

So my kids are decently versed in not messing with the dogs and treating them with respect. However, kids are kids and dogs are dogs. The other night my 8 year old was playing with her crazy brother. She was laying on the floor and blowing imaginary "darts" at her brother. She shouldn't have been on the floor. That's one of my rules when dogs are out-no kids on the floor. However, as kids do, she forgot and fell down on the carpet while she  "blew" an imaginary dart at alex. Brisby was right in her path and got blown in the face which startled him. He reacted and  pawed her face, giving her a pretty red scrape. Of course, he thought she was doing something to him and reacted. She had paw scratches on her face for the next 2 days. While she was ok physically, besides superficial stuff, she was scared. But she actually apologized to Brisby and told me she shouldn't have been on the floor blowing air in Brisby's direction.  We did not punish Brisby and Grace actually knew she was in the wrong and hasn't been on the floor since.

I guess I just wanted to show that these kids/dog things happen even in hypervigelent households but you can educate your family when it happens. You can train your dogs and your kids.I love my kids, and my dogs. Mistakes happen on both sides. Its how you chose to handle it and learn from it and move forward that matters.

OK Im rambling.

PB&J says Hi to all.

 . \I 

[Jen, Buddy, & Kevin]

Totally agree with everything you said.... And I think you're doing a great job, Jenn! You have a great understanding of everyone in your family, their needs, and spot on responses to issues. :-)

[Joanne ~ Spud*]

John removed his comments. Understandable.  He thought this message just for him  It really is not.

We all have families, children, Grand Children. We have all had difficulty and this is a great topic to cover 

[jenn D]

This message was not directed to anyone at all. That wasn't my intent. I guess I was just hoping to open discussion about the fact that having dogs and kids creates challenges. I wanted to show that even though I am super diligent things happen just from the basic fact that kids are kids and dogs are dogs. And I wanted to share the trials and tribulations, not to just paint things as all roses so we could all talk about some of the challenges of being a dog owner. Plus I was hoping to offer support to those families wanted to raise dogs with young kids and say it can be done even when things happen.
I sincerely apologize if I offended anyone. :(

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

I don't think you have a single thing to apologize for, Jenn. Your intent was clear and well-expressed, and your message a good one.

[Rosemary (Ro) and Enzo]

I agree. I was thinking last night what a shame that John's situation had to come into play on this thread. Opposite ends of the spectrum, where one has worked tirelessly to her attain and achieve a goal...and the other ...a completely direction taken :(

[John B]

Let me clarify a few things.  My deleted post was never directed toward Jenn and I apologize to her for not clarifying.  It actually was helpful.  Second, my apologies to you as well.  I was being a little more than sensitive given your direct but appreciated response to my post from last week.  

Let's just say that the amount of guilt I am carrying is more than a little. I wonder everyday if what I saw was real?  Could I of stuck it out and not put my kids at risk?  Was it my careless parenting that produced the aggressiveness?  It didn't help that the breeder texted me last night to blame me and say "See, she is great, not a bit of aggressiveness-must be you!"

Anyway, it makes sense that your post wasn't at me as I did not realize you were involved with rescues. To that end I went on the DRC site today and made a donation in my name.  

[F, Calla & Luca]

That was very nice.

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

Thank you, John. I'm glad you understand. 

[jenn D]

John, the post was not meant for you and I am sorry it struck a chord. Honestly I just wanted to open conversation about the fact that even in savvy dog households kid and dog management is continual and not always easy. I am sorry sorry for the difficult descion you were faced with. I know how difficult that can be. :(

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

Thank you for sharing this and for being such a smart "kid and doggie Mom". 

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

I also wanted to say I have two Doodles and I have never had dogs before that use their paws so much. Both of them reach in our directions with their paws. Vern has gotten me several times pretty good with his massive paw. They both interact a lot with us with their  paws and both like to have us hold their paw. I don't know if it is a Doodle thing, but it is our Doodle's thing :) I got our Hershey when our daughters were 10 and 8 and I was not half as diligent as you have been, so I commend you. I also think for many of us there is just a commitment there when we get a dog that it is for the duration of the dog's life and we will work all the "stuff" out. Good for you!

[Adina P]

It's definitely a challenge to raise dogs and kids.  I can't say I'm as careful or strict as you are, but I have my own rules for my sanity.  Thank you for sharing.