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In the long and continuing saga of conquering Stew's guarding, I'm really confused and unsure what type of training to use.

1) private trainer told me to desensitize Stew to me approaching with the dropping treats method, then slowly condition for me to reach and grab something. I've done that a lot, Stew seems to respond and I can walk right next to him, he'll drop what he has & if I distract him by making him eat a treat a little bit away from the item, I can reach and grab it. If he tries to get on the couch or does attention seeking behaviors, I'm to stop him and walk towards him, getting in his space until he backs off.

2) my aunt told me I need to assert myself as alpha. She told me to startle Stew (penny can, loud clap, loud slap of a piece of paper) if he won't get off the couch or give something up and make him get off or drop what he has, then make him come to me. She said that's better than an alpha roll and you aren't doing anything physically to the dog, but showing him that's unacceptable. My aunt is VERY concerned that Stew seems to be "alpha aggressive" and growls, snaps and has bitten me. She told me if I don't assert myself as alpha that maybe I shouldn't have Stew and he's not a good match for me, that I need to get over a fear of getting bitten and get a more docile dog.

My big question is, the trainer told me growling is good, in that it alerts you that your dog is uncomfortable. I need to let him know he doesn't need to feel anxious and desensitize him. My aunt said her dogs never growl at her and she is alpha. When you all say that you don't tolerate growling or your dogs know that you can take anything from them, HOW do you do that? I don't want to take anything from Stew by force, as I don't want to be bitten and don't want him to start freaking anytime I approach.

I KNOW Stew is great dog. He's housebroken, rings bells to go out, pee/poop on command, does fine in the crate (that's another discussion-my neighbor was apparently ONLY having a bad day and it's NOT an issue at all, so all that was for naught) not food aggressive, sits for almost everything, waits at doors/for food, obeys commands & tricks (right/left paw, down, sit, high five, sit pretty, bow, crawl). Pretty AWESOME for my first dog and I'm doing it by myself. I just need to get this guarding down.

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LOL.....it's not every animal or even noise, with Enz. She randomly decides what or who is bark worthy. I swear, she did a double take on the elephant last night...and our a TV is raised above the fireplace, so she must stand back and look up. She growled at the elephant and then would look at us like: are you seriously worried about such a creature????? The commercial was over, she stood a few seconds more and watched and then came and layer by me. On intelligence: The jury is still out! ;)

Stew rarely notices the TV, although now I play the Light Classical Music channel (I have Comcast) and I swear I see him watching it. His crate is partially in front of the TV now. He puts his back to the crate door and looks up certain times of the day. I noticed it last week when I was taping him with my iPad.

Ironically, he seems to notice my phone volume more, if I have the volume raised a watch a clip of something on my phone, he definitely comes to investigate. He may be more used to the TV than the phone speaker though.

.I have one of each. I would vote in favor of the first theory but admittedly the sample is not large : ) And admittedly there are different kinds if intelligence.
The last article is a very good read. I think that dogs, like children, each have some personality traits that they are born with, and the training must be customized for each dog. One would need to know if the growl is "back off b***ch!" or "don't hurt me!" Some dogs are naturally submissive, some will always strive to be the leader. One size training doesn't fit all.

I think the important thing is to try to understand the growl.  What is the dog worried about?  Is he afraid of something?  Then you find another way for your dog to deal with the problem.

We all do this automatically when we reassure our dog.  We say "It's OK" and our dog knows that we are aware of the threat and we will protect them.  For some dogs this takes a bit more work to reassure them that the bicycle, skate board, UPS man, etc. are OK.

Yes, very interesting article.

Ok, I'm still mostly confused. I don't want to go towards Stew when he growls, but I'm assuming I don't want to back down either as I can't have Stew thinking he can run the show. Honestly, I think he does in certain ways. I hesitate to say he's aggressive, because he's very obedient aside from when he guards things.

For example, last night we worked on getting on and off the couch. I pointed up to the couch, said up, once he sat down, I said off, pointing down, he jumped right off, I praised/treated. After 5 minutes, he got on/off with just the hand signal. We practiced sitting before I allow him up, which he did multiple times last night, however, I said no and he laid down on the floor. This morning, he got on the couch and laid down. I walked over, said "off!", he growled. I stayed where I was, standing in front of the couch to the side of him, I said off again and used the hand signal. He growled again, I repeated the command. After about a minute, he jumped off, I praised like crazy and treated.

Did I handle that correctly? At times, the trainer's advice seems to be too slow moving, what if he gets something that I need to take from him? I don't want to just let him have the sock etc, just so I can grab treats to throw at him to get his attention-that seems like a reward.

I think you did fine.  Stew complained about getting off the couch.  You stood your ground and let Stew know you were serious.  Give him a stern look and use your business voice.  It's always easier when it's a training game.  Now he needs to know it is real life.  It may seem wrong to treat him when he doesn't immediately respond but you are treating him for his compliance, not his stubbornness.  And a big treat and praise when it is hard for him is exactly right.  Hopefully, with consistency, he will be responding quicker.  

In regards to practicing taking things from him, just use whatever toy he has at the moment.  Then give it back so he knows he can trust you to give him back his toys.  Personally, I would make sure socks are always in a hamper and off limits.

Are you meeting with the trainer again?  Make a list of questions!

Sounds like you did a great job standing your ground as the authority figure.

There is one thing our trainer warned us about with treat training. You risk a situation where the dog is only obeying because they want a treat. Not because they respect your leadership. While it might appear he is obeying because he respects your leadership, is it possible he thinks he is still running the show? For example, he knows that he can GET YOU to give him a treat if he gets on and off the couch. You interpret it to mean he is obeying you but he doesn't see it that way. He got you to give him a treat. He made the rules. When a reverse situation occurs, you want him to give you what he has, he says "No way" because those aren't "his" rules as "pack leader." Or maybe the growl is like a teenager rebelling?

I realize people WAY more experienced than me here really disagree with the pack leader idea, but in observing our puppy I have realized she seems to respond better when she is securing knowing we are the "pack leader." She may bark at someone coming to our house, but she runs to us to let us know and doesn't attack the person.

I've heard this theory before regarding the dog manipulating the person.  In learning theory, however, it doesn't really matter.  What is happening is that you are establishing a pattern.  The dog learns through repetition that he has to get down with the OFF command.  At first, it may be all about the cookie but he is still learning the correct behavior.  It may take some time but responding to the OFF command will become a habit.

Is Stew getting a treat when he obeys? Cocoa is very treat driven, and if she sees a treat she becomes a perfect student.

Leslie- Yes, he gets treats when obeys.

The other option is if I'm on the couch and he jumps onto it, is to pick him up and move him off the couch, saying off while I do it. The few times I've tried this, he growls, snaps and tries to whip his head around to bite. So, if I don't want to be bitten, I need to say off, wait until he gets off then treat him.

All the talk about not being the leader scares me, to be honest. I'm worried one day he could really snap, when I'm just trying to make myself the leader. I don't want Stew to just snap randomly and start guarding my apartment from me. If he were truly aggressive, wouldn't he be a complete handful and not obedient at all? We played fetch at lunch and I made him drop the ball every time & he did. he just drops it SO close to him or he drops it and it rolls away I don't want to walk to get the ball and worry he will start moving to the ball and attack me trying to get it. He also brings the ball back, but sometimes will drop it, then grab it again and run to lay down with it.

Which will eventually lead me to not even want to fetch with him if I think he'll guard the ball. I'm trying NOT to get afraid of him.

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