Best ways to establish people leadership?

[Cindy and Olive (Ollie)]

If you believe that people leadership makes a happy puppy (I do) then please share your best tips you've received from trainers or from reading books or from your experience...
I am working with my twelve and fifteen yr old sons to establish their leadership, especially. Any helpful advice much appreciated, thanks!

Now please excuse a rant: why do friends and relatives who seem unsupportive of training advise me to, "Let the dog be a dog!" What the heck does that mean, anyway? What is wrong with consistent training in order to teach a pup good manners and behavior? Geesh. A little support appreciated. :)

[Gwyndolyn Morasko]

Are your 12 and 15 year olds your children or your dogs? Knowing that would change a lot of the responses. :-)
And I'm with you on the small rant about how many adult humans scoff at me for the fact that I train my dogs to do anything other than be gun dogs for hunting companions. They think it's mean that I've trained them to go into a down stay and nap while I'm eating meals at the table. And that I'm "ridiculous" for not letting them beg for or have table scraps, and that I make them sit and wait quietly for my "take it" or "OK" commands for their treats, dinner, or to go for a walk. The most common response I get is "gees! For gods sake! They are just dogs! Just Let them have it"

[Cindy and Olive (Ollie)]

Thanks, Gwyndolyn! And for what it's worth, I support your training! And I truly believe that dogs are less stressed when they have rules, boundaries and limitations. To clarify, the 12 and 15 yo are my sons... They tend to get less respect from pup than me. I find I am trying to train the boys along with the pup which is tiring, esp as my younger has special needs. But, this pup has been amazing for our fam. Just want pup to respect all of us... Suggestions welcomed! Thx!

[Gwyndolyn Morasko]

If you can fit it into your budget, I highly recommend that you find a good dog trainer to come and do several weeks of "training the trainers" at your house and walking in your own neighborhood. My boyfriend and I got more out of the 6 weeks of training than the pups, because it was more about getting the two of us to learn how to be extremely consistent with how we gave commands, how we handled the leash, and how we corrected the pups so that they respected both of us equally and weren't confused by the different approaches we had. Having an outsider train us was invaluable because we were doing it slightly differently and it took an outsider to hone us in on the consistent approach without feelings and ego getting involved and the puppies benefitted quickly and happily to having the same commands and same corrections from both of us. It calms them to not be confused.

[Cindy and Olive (Ollie)]

I totally agree that good trainers are so valuable but because it is so expensive ($105/hr where I live) is partly why I asked people to share tips! Free advice always welcome ;)

[Karen, Jasper and Jackdoodle]

It's a very worthwhile investment, and spread over the 12-15 years you will have your dog, not really very expensive at all. :) 

[Maryann,Roo and Tigger]

What in the world does "Let a dog be a dog mean"?  Should they pee where they please?  That's training.  How about constant barking? I am sure these people would be the first to complain.  Dogs have been domesticated for thousands of years, and millions of happy "well integrated" - how's that for a fancy word for trained? - dogs and families are a testament to training.

I agree with Gwendolyn completely about a trainer for your teens and dog.  It is a steep price but it will be some of the best money you ever spent.  My teenagers thought I knew less than nothing, if yours are the same, they will profit enormously from the money.  Be sure to do your research - any trainer who will not talk to you and your teens and dog for a half hour for free, should immediately be disqualified.

In the meantime in the free advice part - have each feed Ripply consistently maybe one takes breakfast and one takes dinner.  This will be seen as leadership by your puppy.  They should learn best from watching you. Have each of them teach the puppy a "trick" like sit, shake, down, spin.  Sit is especially easy to teach - with a small treat in your hand, wait until the puppy is focused on you but not jumping - usually the puppy will eventually stand looking up at the treat and you.  Then slowly move the treat backward from his nose in front of the pup towards the back of his head, he should sit automatically.  Say "sit" as this happens.  Then praise and treat.  Before long just the treat  will prompt a sit.

For your special needs son, you might explore clicker training, if his mobility is impaired.  There is lots online about "clicker training" just google it. Basically you first train that the clicker equals treat , then you click to "reward" the appropriate behavior.  I really like hand signs as well as words for each command, so if speech is a problem just use a hand sign and a word simultaneously.  This all sounds simple and is not really difficult, but patience, consistency and timing is everything.

So, if this is the first puppy you have ever raised, maybe your first dog ever, please look for a good trainer - one that fits you and your kids.  There are lots of good books available at the library on dog training.  Look for one that the author actually has some credentials and experience. Would you take up skiing, golf, or anything that you wanted to learn without a teacher.  Good training makes good dogs and it is a skill to be able to raise a good dog.  You have a lot on your hands with two teens.  Invest in a few lessons with a  good trainer upfront, it can make the difference between a dog that is a valued family member and a horrible experience. 

[Cindy and Olive (Ollie)]

Thanks, Maryann! I didn't know that trainers should give you a bit of free time. I spent two sessions with one I thought very good - he doesn't believe in treats earning respect, says the roots of learning go much deeper without all the food. Not sure how many more times we can keep on with him, but your encouragement makes it feel even more worth it. Rippley has learned a lot and it seems my hub and I are seen as leaders in his mind so far... Great ideas about feeding and training for the kids, will do that! Thanks so much!

[Gwyndolyn Morasko]

A good dog trainer will also love dogs more than they love money, so they will be happy to recommend good videos for you to buy that you can watch over and over with your kids.  So for the price of one or two formal training sessions, you can have a library to watch over and over after you have exhausted your budget on the trainer.  

With my first puppy, I did use treats for the first 2 months, then switched to clicker training and praise for his treats.  I wasn't consistent enough to keep up with the clicker, so I switched to a distinct and happy "Yes!" as my "clicker" noise to acknowledge the correct behavior.  By the time I adopted my second puppy when Kona was 10 months old, I didn't use any treats with her, and she is actually more obedient than Kona.  Hmmm.....I'm not sure how much of that is due to not using treats, and how much of that is because she is just scary smart.  Either way, training can be done without treats very effectively.  I will give them a treat for responding quickly to potty time at night when I need to get to bed or get out the door to a meeting.  I will pre-empt Maggie's wandering yard inspection routine by saying "Yes!  Good Girl!" "Good Potty!" and she amazingly will stop her running around and squat and run towards me because she equates those three commands with a treat.  I only do that when I'm in a hurry, though, so 75% of the time, they don't get a treat for potty time.  (Kona has never needed a potty treat.....I had him from day one, and he is very good at peeing as soon as I say "Go Hurry Up!"  It was a little harder to figure out a good set of words for an 11 month old stray rescue who was all street smart!  I learned in a few days that "Potty" was her word)

[Maryann,Roo and Tigger]

Hi again  Deadheading my plants and thinking about you, very young puppy and teens.  More free tips that worked for me, some from one of the several trainers I have learned from.  Toys - lots of toys for the puppy, never sit down on the floor without two or three within easy reach.  For me that meant toys all over the floor for awhile.  If you need to be neater keep them in baskets in the main rooms.  Everyone should always have a toy available to substitute for their hand.  Puppies learn with their mouth and especially retrieving dogs, like labs and poodles.  Puppies will "bite" during play.  I put "bite" into quotations marks because they are not biting in the sense of meaning to hurt you, it's just how they play.  That's why you always need toys handy to pop in their mouth.

Your boys will probably rough house with the puppy, mine did with every puppy and grown dog, still does and he's 37.  That's okay.  The sign for you to call a "cool down"  is when it has reached your tolerance - which will grow with experience, or when the puppy is frantically barking like he is frightened.  Your ear will tune in to different barks, noises as will your boy's if you listen carefully.  A cool down occurs with a toy in puppy's mouth, held by human to keep it there (not tug of war though), this is calming in itself and long slow petting from neck to tail or chest to waist of belly." "Enough" said firmly us the word I always used to stop play.  Puppy soon learned the meaning also.  If neither son nor puppy complies, then intervene with reminder of meaning and how to act ( to both).  If still no stoppage separate them.  Neither will like this or you, but it probably will get your point across.  Just remind everyone it is your job to prevent injury, hurt feelings, etc.  My kids use to mimic me "It's all fun until someone gets hurt and cries" , but all involved, canine and human, got the message.

I'll try to add more later

 

[Gwyndolyn Morasko]

By the way....Ripley is flippin' adorable!  He looks a lot like Kona when he was just 5 to 8 weeks old before his curls started to come in.  His mom looks an awful lot like a slightly less red version of Kona's mom, so they have a lot of similarities.  

[Cindy and Olive (Ollie)]

Aww thanks! High praise from parent of your adorable duo!!

[Jen W]

I recommend reading The Dog Listener.  The tips in there are all about establishing yourself a the leader.  My breeder recommended it and it seems to have worked for us!