Labradoodle & Goldendoodle Forum
First timer feeling overwhelmed but hopeful
I knew puppies were work, but didn't expect it to take over my life. I am a little crazy with keeping a clean and tidy house and it is currently a mess! Dexter unhappily sleeps in his crate at night and is in there when I have to go out, but otherwise he is with me. He usually cries for about 10 minutes then calms down. I take him out once during the night and knock on wood he hasn't had an accident in the crate since the first night. We also have cats and one just completely avoids him, but the other is a ragamuffin and that breed is known not to fight back. I have been successful at getting a hold of Dexter before he gets a bite in. I do worry for my sweet kitty though.
My house has a very open floor plan. Dexter stays with me in my family room/kitchen, but gates won't really work for us. Once I feel he is mostly house trained I will start allowing him to go in the other rooms too, but I'm sure that will be some time from now. We also have a large fenced back yard, but because he is so young, he can walk right through the gate. I keep him close or leashed in the back also.
My husband either works from home or travels occasionally. Since I don't work and was the one who pushed for this, I take on 90 percent of the work. My son doesn't get home from school until 4:30, has homework, music lessons, scouts, etc. he helps, but isn't always around.
I had a trainer in last week when I was completely sleep deprived and hitting a breaking point. She gave me a few ideas to start training with and a few games to play. They work well, but there are times that you can see him just get out of control with jumping and nipping and I start losing my patience and just hope his nap is coming.
There are times when he is calmer and seems to really listen to me and acts so sweet. They are rare, but gives me hope for the future.
I want to walk around with a big smile and say how fun this is as I see so many others do. I know I sound like a big whiner. I am the type of person to just say how I really feel. This is tough and sometimes I am just too tired and don't want to go out in the pouring rain or sit on the floor and entertain and get nipped at. Sometimes I enjoy it, but others not as much.
Everyone tells me the hard work will pay off, but when does it get easier? Looking forward to hearing opinions.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by SoSa on
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Tonight was really frustrating. A little while ago on his outside potty break, Ace went into his ultra hyper mode where he is growling, nipping, biting our pants, running like mad, pulling and biting on his leash. If you pick him up he growls and tries to nip. He won't listen to any commands. He's just pretty much uncontrollable and only leaves the option of startling him. I hate to startle him, but when he gets like that, he leaves no opportunity for any positive reinforcement. My daughters got him into his crate after he calmed down. He fell asleep. It's still early here in Seattle, so he is not down for night. I am not looking forward to wake/potty time. UGGHHHHH!!!!
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Permalink Reply by Lori, Winnie, Bob and Indie on
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Winnie used to do that EXACT same thing. I used to dread taking her out because it was never even remotely fun- it was always pure frustration. Two things that I did really helped. I carried a rope toy in my pocket, and the second she started her "crocodile imitation" I put the rope toy in her mouth. That kept her teeth off of me while I calmly made her sit in front of me- both of us facing the same direction, with my hands on her shoulders. While I was doing that I was telling her "Settle." Once I felt her body relax, I praised her, gave her a treat and let her up. Sometimes she would start right back in and I would have to do it again. A trainer had explained to me that it was not a "dominance" maneuver like the Alpha roll (which I am not a fan of- I tried it a couple of times and it only made things worse). But, it was a way to help her control herself. It took a lot of practice, but little by little the behavior went away. And, I will say that it got a LOT worse for about a week before it got better.
Hang in there- it WILL get better! :-)
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Permalink Reply by Gracie, Jade, & Barkley on
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Great idea about the washcloth balls. I might give that a try. I call that sound her monkey voice, but hyena is about right too!
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Sosa - I posted something similar about the biting and nipping in a thread called Crazy in the Evenings in the puppy group.
The advice I got there was awesome. I'm about 5 weeks ahead of you in the puppy rearing. I can say it does get better. Gracie still nips, chews, mangles my hand, but when you know that this is normal puppy behavior and that everyone goes through it and everyone says it will get better, then it makes it easier to bear. I actually read that puppies who chew and mouth you are actually very happy. They explore with their teeth.
Gracie is still a crazy biter in the evenings, but I think it has to do with how tired she is. No matter what chew toy I offer her anytime past 7 pm, she prefers my hands! She gets to rest in her crate a lot more after 7 pm (when I get more time to read and watch videos on puppy training).
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We're just reading that discussion. :-) He's up from his nap and it seems as if he's calmed down for the night. I too think the ultra crazies come from being really tired. I really look forward to the day when this passes or calms at the very least. Thanks for the encouragement.
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Permalink Reply by Dexter Doodle on
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Yup, it took me a long time to realize that the crazies were from being overtired. What worked for me for the indoor nipping (again everyone has different ways) was a technique my trainer taught. If I was on the floor with him and he started mouthing I would tell him "no bite" and pick him up and kind of cradle him. He would be in more of the sitting up position against my chest and I would have my hand near his chest to help control the squirming. I would just watch tv or carry on a conversation ignoring him. He would squirm, but eventually let out a sigh and relax. Once he was fully relaxed I would tell him "good" and put him down. Sometimes he would start the crazy squirming before I was able to release him and we would have to start over. Everyone in my house had to do this when he nipped them. I felt like all I did was hold him for a few days, but he caught on. I'm not going to say it stopped it completely, but it greatly improved (to the point where I wasn't feeling frustrated) within the first week.
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We do that too to calm Gracie down, especially in the evenings when she's hyped up.
She's not much of a lap dog, so it's not easy for her, but we don't give up until we hear that sigh. ;)
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Permalink Reply by Mary M. on
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OK, I am now officially petrified!!!
And we don't even pick up Henly until 3/28
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Permalink Reply by Lucy & AnnaBelle's Mom on
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I apologize if someone has already mentioned this, but since you have some time before your Henly comes home you might want to check out doggiedan.com He is an awesome trainer. There are really great videos that show training a puppy from day one ... He tells you what he is going to do and then he has a video that shows him putting it in action. For any problems that you are going to encounter he has a video to cover it. There is a small monthly fee but you can try it out before joining and you can absolutely cancel with no hassle at any time. He also talks a great deal about becoming the pack leader which is the most important thing. You have the opportunity to start all of this from day one. We all talk about getting trainers for our doodles when in reality we are getting trainers to train us. I've learned so much about dogs and puppies and training since getting my first doodle. Just remember the more that you put into it, the more you get out of it. With a new puppy, everything is a training opportunity.
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