Attacked, Ganged up, and Intentionally Ostracized

[Nothing To Do With Doodles]

I understand that in every forum there is a clique of old members who monitor and oversee a forum. The purpose is typically to facilitate a harmonious and amicable atmosphere. This was NOT my experience here! I am NOT the only member who feels this way. After a few private messages, I've come to realize a lot people:
1. Feel they are not relevant and are simply being ignored (mostly new members),
2. Fear the condescension that follows after asking a question or posting a different opinion or
3. Won't share their experience out of fear of people ganging up and attacking them and then forced to be ostracized.
Essentially, no one wants drama. But how can there be a positive change without someone to speak up about the existing problem?

All of this seem especially ironic because it can't even be followed by the veterans of this forum the first few sentences out of DK Guidlines says:

"Be Nice. Doodle Kisses is here for connecting doodle owners around a common interest: our doodles! Even though we all love doodles, there will always be differing opinions within large groups. That is okay. Don't let your heated opinion about a topic or idea turn into heat against an individual.

Don't post on the public threads personal differences, arguments, old grudges, hearsay, private messages, etc. Keep personal grudges private. Doodle Kisses is not the place for rehashing old grudges or personal issues with other members. We don't provide judges, lawyers or juries."

This was seriously violated not by new members but from what I see veterans of this site. You see it on and off on different discussions but my particular experience was on recent discussion titled "diarrhea". The conversation took a turn when my opinion deviated from others regarding pet insurance. I had pet insurance for my five pets (3 dogs and 2 cats) for almost a decade, I wanted to share my experience. And ESPECIALY what I learned in the end but it was too late! One particular member strongly disagreed with my opinion and then her followers came in for the kill and to finish the job. Have I violated the rules and got offended? Absolutely!

Knowledge and experience are wonderful tools. When you have the good fortune of having it, it can be tremendously helpful and informative, but on the other hand, it is being used to bully and ostracize. It is my experience that if one educates people in a friendly manner, they are more likely to listen. So why not take the higher road? Let's try to enforce Adina's vision: "Doodle Kisses a fun, informative, and respectful place where we can all have fun 'talking doodle."

Read more here: http://www.doodlekisses.com/notes/Community_Guidelines#ixzz4KnzgKgYr

Disclaimer: For those of you posting a response, know it may get ignored ( as so much of my posts have been ignored by others in the past) but thank you for reading this.

[Sam&Bella]

Awww.... Thank You!!!

[33bn7f8evnuyd]

9-20 5:42pm EST

If one was to look at the discussion Diarrhea Discussion it is going to be completely INCOMPREHENSIBLE. LOL Almost everything has been deleted. Thankfully, my email is still there.  

I admit, the only two things I said that could have come across as offensive was 1. "hypochondriac" (this was said after her cancer rant) and 2. I said her "need to be correct"  

After I apologized, the following were said to me:

 And when did I EVER question her honesty?    

[Debbie and Toby]

I did not interpret it as a cancer "rant", it was stating the facts that cancer treatment can be very costly and easily exceed $20,000. If I remember correctly you said there was no way it could cost that much, but it is reality that cancer treatment is very expensive. That would be an expense that a lot of people could not afford without having some sort of insurance to offset the costs.

[33bn7f8evnuyd]

This breaks down the typical cost of cancer. http://pets.costhelper.com/dog-cancer-treatment.html   As you can see $25,000 is not the common cost. Either you need something serious like Bone Marrow Transplant, which I would add is offered by very few vets, or you live somewhere with unusually high vet cost ie NYC.  Again, if your dog really did get cancer, the $25,000 that Karen said would far exceed any annual maximum. If you don't have the money, you 1. wouldn't be able to afford insurance in the first place, 2. couldn't afford to wait and be reimbursed by the insurance and your credit limit may not allow you to borrow $25k.  If you can afford insurance, by all means, go right on ahead. If you've got your claims covered consider yourself lucky.  That is gonna change if your dog lives beyond the average age and you have multiple claims.  But people are free to do what they want, it is your money not mine.  I've already been scammed.  

For those who can't there are a bunch of charity group that help low-income families. A few to consider are: The Dog & Cat Cancer Fund: Fairy Dogparents: The Pet Fund.  

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

This discussion needs to be closed and I hope Admin. jumps in and does it! We are not supposed to bash other members in discussions and that is all you are doing at this point. I find it interesting that your copies do not show the comments you made that prompted some of these responses. Please close this discussion and move on.

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

I hope so too, Laurie.

[33bn7f8evnuyd]

That is how the emails work Laurie. It alerts you to other people's responses.  

[Debbie and Toby]

I noticed the same thing, i agree..discussion needs to be closed, otherwise it will just go on and on..and the drama takes away from what DK was meant for...to have meaningful discussions about our doodles...without the name calling and bashing..

[33bn7f8evnuyd]

That is the pot calling the kettle black.  The whole point of this discussion was how the rules were not observed in how I was treated. But it is okay for me to get bashed but not you? 

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

I agree, Laurie. There's no point to this. 

[33bn7f8evnuyd]

There is a point Cheryl. It is called it does not kill someone to be nice and say let us agree to disagree and leave it at that! No need for the attacks! No need to break the rules! I don't understand why so many old members of this forum don't get that! 

[33bn7f8evnuyd]

First off, I never mentioned her name to start this discussion but used her name when provoked about the "diarrhea" discussion. Then I noticed some of the comments were deleted yesterday and even more deleted today. This makes this whole discussion senseless, which is why I included the screen caps.  It was DISGUSTING the way I was treated.  And I'm sure it would make you minions very happy for me to roll over and say nothing like so many of us do.