The addition of a second dog

[Sarah Bennett]

Good afternoon.  I've added a second dog to my household that includes just myself and my doodle, Salvador.  And I've got some questions. 

First some background: Salvador is 3.5yrs old, 90lbs.  Has been an only dog for his whole life.  Goes to doggie daycare weekly and to the local dog park multiple times per week. He has doggie friends (all female) that come over or we go over to visit.  At doggie daycare, I'm told he gets along with all dogs, he's kind of the class clown, that he does best with dogs smaller than him though his BFF is an english sheepdog. The owner has told me that he is one of  the dogs that she uses to to introduce new dogs to the daycare.  The only dog that I've seen him not get along with was a hairless chihuahua. Salvador is very hyper/lots of energy, very social, loves people and loves other dogs even more. 

So, given all of this, I thought that he would love a playmate to live with.  Thus comes Josmer, a rescue mutt, about 35 + lbs, between 1-2 yrs old, but probably closer to the 1 yr mark.  He was suggested to me by the daycare owner, as he was an emergency foster placement there and she told me that they played well together.  

I met Josmer, and liked him. he's a little (a lot) jumpy, but a sweet dog that has not been taught a lot of manners (but bonus-he is potty trained). 

I had Salvador meet him at the local dog park and Salvador and S acted a lot bossier than what I've seen him before.  Was trying to wrangle in the play of J and S was snappy, which is something that I've never seen before.  However, they did play well a fair amount of times. I agreed to take J home, for a week trial. 

At home S was so bossy...I've never saw this before.  Anything that J tried to do, S would snap at him, growl and start a ruckus.  I cried Friday night.

Saturday was more of the same in the morning. I was gone for about 4 hrs in the afternoon (with J crated) and when I got home we all played and had a decent time, though S was bossy and barky multiple times. In the evening the dogs were laying there, with bones, S got up to come to me and J attacked S.  It was one of the scariest experiences that I've had.  I was able to separate them, let them go and then J attacked again. Separated them again, put J in his crate and gathered up all the bones and put them in freezer.  S climbed up on my lap and was trembling.  Eventually I had to go upstairs, S followed me and stayed upstairs the entire night, even though J was still crated.  S never stays in a different room unless that he can see me from another room. I had to force S to come downstairs to go outside before bed. Needless to say Saturday I cried too.

Sunday, there was still more bossy-ness, barking and snapping and such.  Not as bad as Saturday, but still not great. In general J is afraid to go out and to come in from going potty (I only have a lead/tie out-I'm getting a fence installed early next week), S is not eating well-has maybe ate 1 cup of food since Friday night.

To be honest, J is a great little dog. He's cuddly, sweet, tries to please his person, and appears to be so wonderful.  If S was not in the picture, I would totally keep J with no questions.

I'm just not sure what to do at this point.  Is this normal?  There are times that they get along well, but there are times that I'm concerned about their interaction and how S is reacting about this.  

Any thoughts?  Thank you in advance! 

[Amy and Annabelle]

I don't have 2 dogs, but I wanted to let you know there is a recent post about adding a second dog, if you don't get many responses. You may be able to get some advice from there. I hope it all works out for you and the dogs.

http://www.doodlekisses.com/forum/topics/help-with-introducing-2nd-...

[Lynda Kamrath]

S is just trying to set limits and resource guard (you).  It is a confusing time for him because he had always been the only dog with you.  If he gets along with other dogs when you are not around, then it surely is resource guarding.  They will work it out if you give them a little time.  We always have at least two dogs and they get very dependent on each other.  My dogs argue occasionally but love to be around each other.  Currently we have three and it makes it easier to take only one out because the other ones have companionship at home.

[Adina P]

When my husband brought home his (eventually our) first doodle, his "only child" was a border collie about 10 years old.  The doodle pup was 11 months.  The first two weeks were constant status establishment.  I remember one time they spent circling each other and barking like two teenage boys about to fight.  Then it was over and they learned to co-exist peacefully.  They never became "friends" but keep in mind our border collie was a senior and was more into humans than dogs.  So it is possible that this too shall pass, but no guarantees.  They will need your help to figure out status and relationship to you.  You will have to be an obvious leader and they will have to be obviously below you in the pecking order.  Valuable things like bones and toys should probably only be given when they are separated, though...at least for a while. 

[BG and Gavin]

I do not have experience with this, but it may not be the right fit. How long do you have to decide? What does your gut say?

[Sarah Bennett]

Honestly, I just don't know. Sometimes I'm like J's got to go and sometimes I think he's the best little thing for S. When they get along they do well, when they don't, holy crappie! In fact last night I did get a little bite (scratched/broke the skin) in one of their arguments.

[Stacy]

I was the one who was just in this situation not five minutes ago. I got great advice and you will too. I won't pretend that I have all the answers, because obviously I don't! But, I will say that in the week and a half since I brought Ava home we have made significant strides toward becoming a happy family again. I can't say that they 100% love each other 100% of the time, but they are getting along okay about 98% of the time and only mild grumbling on occasion. And Katie, who I was concerned was afraid of her new big momma, (I would say sister, but it's really her mom) is acting normally again. 

I think especially when you bring a rescue dog into the house that we have to remember that that dog is going through a huge upheaval of everything they've ever known and it takes a while for them to settle in and you can see and experience their true personality. An example, just tonight I heard Ava bark for the first time. I don't know why she hadn't before, but tonight we saw the neighbors out in their yard and she joined Katie in barking at them. Last night she jumped up and put her paws on the kitchen table. I believe as she realizes she's safe and this is the new normal her personality will develop. Hopefully mostly in positive ways, but she definitely won't always be that terrified dog I brought home. 

I will also say that from the moment I picked Ava up I was completely committed to her. Unless she and Katie were literally going to kill one another, there was nothing she could do to make me give her up. Years back I did some rescue and was a foster mom, and from that experience I know that it feels different (at least to me) when you have a foster vs a new dog. And I think that feeling translates to some action on my part, and it wouldn't surprise me if the dogs picked up on that too. I wonder if they know that you have some uncertainty and that causes them some stress and it manifests as aggression toward one another. I may be totally off base with that, it's just what comes to mind. 

Anyway, not much advise here, more of a "I've been here too," commiseration. I wish the three of you the best. I think if Josmer isn't the right fit for your home that you are still doing a wonderful thing by being his foster mom until the right home does come along. 

[Sarah Bennett]

Thank you for commiserating with me! Lol! For the most part J, the new dog is fine, I'm just mostly concerned about S, my doodle. He just is acting so different, so out of character for him. The new dog has some issues, but nothing major. I agreed to take J tentatively because of the strange behaviour from S. I don't want S to have a bad experience because I thought he needed a friend.

[Stacy]

I just wanted to add that I felt like Katie was mopey and timid and totally off during those first days after I brought Ava home. And Ava was kind of growly. And there was a brief moment when I wondered if I had done the right thing, but now at exactly 2 weeks later Katie has snapped out of it. And they might not be best best friends, but they are friendly. They will both sit on the couch at the same time. We all sleep in the same bed. They eat next to each other. Things are going really well. And I was very worried in those first moments.

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

This is all great feedback.  I think the most important thing right now is for you to always maintain a leadership position...they need to clearly understand that you're at the top of the pecking order.  I would definitely control all high value toys and food.  I think it's easy for dogs to get along well when they're on neutral territory.  Try to remember that this is S's home and you have been his "Mom" and now there's this new dog vying for your attention and all the resources in the house....that takes some getting used to.  From the other perspective J now has a home and a "person" and he doesn't want to lose or share that.  Eventually they will understand that you are there for both of them.  I always dole out affection with my two Doodles on my terms....otherwise there can be conflict and the larger one gets pushy.  I don't let them initiate it.  I call them to me for pets (one at a time).  They have been together since puppies, but I still have to do this.  I do the same with high value toys (like their nylabones).  I keep them in a cabinet and give them to each of them only when I'm there to supervise.  I really think this will work out...it will just take some time and them learning that you're the boss and that you're there to take care of BOTH of them.