To Bark or not to Bark!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

We love Vern. We really do, but with the windows open all night, he has taken to barking at lots of noises throughout the night.  Last night, John let the dogs out and said he knew something was out there because he could hear something like a chain rattle.  I don’t know about you, but I have a vivid imagination and I have seen enough horror movies to know you don’t go looking for something or someone rattling a chain late at night.  Nothing good ever happens when you do.  Since our property has a cornfield on one side and the corn is quite high, I would have no problem watching someone go to investigate, but if that person screams out, “the children of the corn are real,” the most help they would get from me as a backup is a slam of the door and a scream back, “it’s been nice knowing you!” 

I am perfectly fine letting things be at night and talking about it in the morning, but Vern seems to want to alert us that we are missing out on some great stuff out in the yard and sometimes gets Fudge in on the party.  When that happens we can hear them moving from window to window and serenading us with one deep bark and a very ladylike, high-pitched bark.  If we get lucky, it eventually stops as quickly as it started and we all go back to sleep.  If we don’t get lucky, one of us gets up and let’s them out hoping for one of two conclusions 1) their investigation turns up nothing or 2) their investigation turns up something or someone who ties them up and gags them so we can all go back to bed.

 

I don’t want to sound ungrateful, because I do appreciate knowing that Vern is on duty 24/7 and Fudge is there for backup at least 4/7, but too much of a good thing can still be too much.  He barks at the neighbors every single time he sees them outside and when they put their fall decorations up, which included a scarecrow; his watchdog duties were elevated to a red alert level, which in Vern’s world is the equivalent of a terrorist invasion.

He can’t seem to get it through his head that the man he keeps barking at has not moved one inch in days and is sitting on a pole.  He barks if he sees a car or truck pull into their driveway and I have told him plenty of times, we are the ones who feed him and they can get their own watchdog, but he doesn’t listen.  If he is in the backyard and he hears the neighbor kids laughing or playing, he barks to let them know to keep the noise down and when their school bus pulls up, he barks to let them know to have a good day. Sometimes, in the morning he runs outside and gives a woof woof  just to say, “good morning world, Vern is up.” 

There is really no rhyme or reason as to when he decides to bark and when he doesn’t and he will go long periods of time without uttering a sound and then all of a sudden look outside and see I have parked my car in a different spot and assume the worst. 

 

He is determined to meet the cat next door and will sit for hours staring through our deer fencing just willing that cat to make an appearance. 

Unfortunately, the few times it has shown up, he waits until it gets close and then barks, which I can only assume by the cat’s fleeing backside is not the best way to introduce himself.  If he looks out our window and happens to see John in the garage, he never seems to say to himself, “I know that person,” and I find myself saying, “Vern, it’s dad….that’s John….for god sakes, Vern, you know who that is,” but he usually continues to alert us to stranger danger until the “stranger” comes in the house.  If Vern were playing the part of Lassie and came home to tell us little Timmy was stuck in a mineshaft, poor Timmy might stay in there for days as we sat around saying, “what is Vern barking at now?” Even Fudge seems to know the difference in his barks and often times will give a slight perfunctory nod of her head and then fall back asleep.

The funny thing is the other night when John let them out to investigate the “great rattling” noise all of a sudden he could no longer see Vern in our yard. Vern can surprise you when you least expect it, because he does have a few tricks up his paws, although we can’t be sure if pushing his way through the deer fencing is deliberate or he just happens to be leaning on it to get a closer look at something and the poor deer fencing gives way under the pressure of Vern’s weight.  Either way, we are thankful it is Vern that gets out and not Fudge, because once Vern figures out everything he loves is on the other side of the fence, he wants back in.  Fudge would only miss us after she had been off and running for a couple of hours and luckily she has not figured out how to duplicate Vern’s great escape. Anyways, back to the other night and as John called out for Vern in the dark, not a peep came from the “great barker of the Northeast,” and John had to finally go inside for a flashlight.  As he shone the light into the darkness, it finally landed on a large white dog standing at the gate, wagging his tail, who seemed just as happy to be found, as John was to find him.  I guess he figured since he was outside our gate it wouldn’t be prudent to call attention to himself. After all, you never know what is out there and it is important to keep your enemies on their toes.  Vern, the best watchdog in the world, knows his business.

[Bonnie and Kona]

Vern, the best watchdog in the world. Perfect ending to a great blog! Thank you, Laurie. Love the photos. Do not love the sound of chains rattling in the night. WTD??? You didn't mention if Vern barks at you when you come home. Both of ours do that. We keep saying, "You can see that it is us! Quiet!" to no avail until we get inside.

[Camilla and Darwin]

I'm so privileged to have seen the watch dog in action. You guys can all rest easy knowing that he will alert you of danger! Your two are so entertaining.

[Lonnie & Libby Lu]

Love this blog and can so relate to it!  Vern and Libby would make a great pair, well actually maybe not!  It would be continuous barking at anything and everything.  Maybe we could put them on TV with a new show, "The Bark Off"!  Like Vern, when her Daddy comes in the door every morning at the same time she barks like a terrorist is plunging through the door. During the day every single person that walks by our house gets a very long and loud howl and major barking!  NOW, you would think I would feel really safe at night!!!!   NO, once she hits our bed and the lights are off, I don't think a train coming through our room would wake her up!  So an alarm system was installed, LOL!  Vern is "the man" to actually bark to come back into the yard!   He is definitely a keeper and an awesome Doodle!

[Pat and Traveler]

Wonderful blog, Laurie!  Love the stranger danger dad.  lol  Cute photos, too.  Trav is watchdog for the neighbors too, and always alerts them when somebody parks in front of their house.  He is very suspicious of anybody who doesn't keep doing the same thing in the same way.  He might be okay with somebody walking down the sidewalk, but if they stop to tie their shoes or pick up a leaf, he knows they're up to no good and sounds the alert. 

[F, Calla & Luca]

Aside from escape talent Calla and Vern were made from the same mold. She barks at the same neighbors all the time. And heaven forbid someone has the audacity to walk by our yard. Except the mailman, who comes in a truck, and as soon as the dogs here that particular truck, even Calla runs to the corner of the yard where she waits silently for a treat.Why Calla has even been rolling a lot lately. I keep my dogs with me at night because I would have to be up with the garbage men, the recylcler folks and early birds and chipmunks. 

[Gail and Bailey]

Vern can come and walk with us at 10PM the nights that the garbage cans are out at the curb and join Bailey in the low growling bark at all the weird short round strangers in the neighborhood!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Jane, Sometimes he does take the dogs out, but don't tell anyone :) LOL

Jane, Yes, we would love to have Stuart visit, but Vern may teach him some new tricks :) LOL I really do know that no one is getting by Vern without a pretty stern warning. Good boy, Stuart. A person with a flash light at night is never good :)

Charlotte, One thing about having a scaredy cat for a dog is he stays close to us, for the most part. Fudge is so independent, off she would go until Christmas :) How funny that Scarlet warned you about a chair. At least she noticed your effort :)

Karen, LOL....Vern says he is on the way :)

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

Well, Laurie, this really is a "good news blog".  "The funny thing is the other night when John let them out to investigate the “great rattling” noise".....JOHN let them out.  Woo Hoo!

[Jane, Rooney & Stuart]

Laurie - I have Vern's twin living with me!  Can I please let Stuart come and play - those two are so much alike it scares me!  Has Vern's barking rubbed off on Fudge - because Rooney never barked till Stuart taught him.  Stuart is a great watch dog - this summer at 2:00 am he was doing a very low growl.  Got up and looked out and there along side the condo in the beach grass was someone with a flash light, luckily on the other side of the fence.  Stuart barked and they took off.  Does give one piece of mind but when he's barking at a squirrel - not so much!  Love ya VERN!!

[Charlotte and Bo]

I had a dog named Scarlet who scared me one night.  She went upstairs to my bedroom and started barking her head off.  As I'm creeping up the stairs to check it out, I'm thinking a thief has climbed through a window or something scarier.  I get up there and find her barking at a chair I had moved.  I guess she didn't like the where I put it.  Either that or she thought it picked itself up and moved itself.

 

I have never had a dog that once it escaped waited patiently at the gate to come back in.  This usually has entailed a stressful search and retrieval  process that left me exhausted.   Bo has never escaped so I'm not sure what he would do, but I would rather not find out.