I got a glimpse of my socialization challenges today

[Julie and Maggie]

Maggie comes home tomorrow by the way (yeah!) Anyway, our neighbor has a lab puppy that is about 16 weeks old and is now vaccinated and out and about on our very family and pet friendly street. Best street ever. A couple of us families were out on a driveway and lab puppy came by being walked by the teenage daughter (great babysitter). 

 

So this is the chaos I see (chaos only noticed by me no one else): Lab puppy being greeted by half dozen very excited children (one is mine), very excited adults, and a very excited neighbor dog which is some kind of boxer mix. Boxer mix dog starts with all the sniffing, a little barking, nothing too bad. His owner rather quickly and easily gets her back in the house because she doesn't like seeing other dogs on leashes (?). Lab puppy seems a bit confused (my interpretation) and starts jumping up which is half encouraged and half disciplined. I'm watching my own son continuing to try to engage in play with the puppy when he really needs to just sit and get calm first (note to self).

 

None of this looks to me the way it is supposed to be- as written in the books. What I am seeing is.... reality. This is a typical real life situation that I will be facing and it is not as controlled as it is when I just read about socializing and training a puppy.

 

I am hoping that I can keep things more orderly during the next two months when Maggie is basically living in my kitchen. I fully plan on taking her out and getting to meet those 100 new people and all that. But it won't be quite the free for all since I can always fall back on "she doesn't have all her shots."

 

What are your experiences with this stage? I know from other posts that even owners of older dogs still face the situation where the people are the ones creating the difficulties in training your dogs. Any advice for starting from the get go?

 

[Linda, Webber and Seda]

If you can I would set limits on the crowd and be ready to pick Maggie up before she gets overwhelmed.  I would also keep her on a leash when she is going on social visits initially.  If you have a Lowes close by you can put her in the cart and roll her around.  People will come over to meet and greet her.  I bet you could get ten of the one hundred on each visit!  If you decide to go to the dog park, stay close to her.  Webber was chased as a puppy and benched next to me.  For the next three visits to the park he wouldn't leave the bench and stayed plastered to my side.   On one occasion Webber and I were walking around the block and the neighbors two little girls started screaming and running around him in circles.  Webber took off to chase them and one of them tripped over him and skinned her knee on the pavement.  It was not a good situation for any of us. Puppies are reactive and some children get excited.   Introducing Maggie to your adult friends and family might be a good place to start.  Give them some treats to give her and make the experiences fun for everyone.  Good luck.  You are going to have so much fun!

[Adina P]

I don't worry too much about puppies being puppies till about 4 months of age.  I certainly don't encourage jumping and try to discourage it as best as possible.  But you really can not control other people.  It just doesn't happen.  I see so many people frustrated with their friends and neighbors who love dogs and say "oh it's okay I don't mind" when their dog jumps on them.  It happens all the time.  Other people are not there to be trained.  Only our dogs are under our control or potential control. 

 

So your best bet is to train your dog really well so that even if people squeak and wave their hands and act all goofy, YOUR dog won't respond like a crazy dog to that excitement.  You won't train a puppy to not respond, but as you stick to training and continue it your dog CAN be a very polite dog. 

 

Socialization is for learning about the world and being comfortable in it.  Think of some child raised in the wilderness by a pack of wolves (unrealistic extreme for the sake of an example) who has never set foot in "the real world" and suddenly that child finds himself among other humans in a suburb where there are kids and bikes and cars and you go to school and grocery stores, etc.  It's a huge culture shock and he'd probably act quite out of place and awkward, right?  That's basically what you want to prevent with socialization. You want the great big world to be 'no big deal' and not scary or all that novel.  That does not replace training.  It does not make a friendly dog less friendly or calm the dog down, necessarily.  Training gives you control of the dog, teaches respect, boundaries, behavior, etc.

[Jennifer and Jack]

Socialization is very much a passion of mine. I do not have the best behaved dog, He is two and still will jump on you like he just won the lottery when I get home. He will stop almost immediately but he still does it. So I for sure am not an expert in the best behaved dogs..

 

Socializing for our family was huge. I am single, no kids, and I am very much a people person, For what I was looking for with Jack I wanted him to be okay in any situation as long as I was. Granted he would not be okay if someone was riding him or pinching him, but I didn't want him to fear anything.

 

If you plan on keeping your dog home for the most part, then it may be different, but I literally bring Jack just about everywhere and when I can't bring him, he either goes to play group, or to a neighbors house.

 

From day one with Jack, (granted he is a toy golden doodle and small) I carried him in a dog carrier much like a baby carrier, I vacuumed every day with him in there, I blow dried my hair, gently blowing cool air on him for one second at a time and making a soothing sound. I banged on pots and pans loud, played loud music. Turned on all my medical equipment, which is very loud, vibrates my lungs, nebulizes all kinds of things, I exposed him to wheel chairs, all kinds of people. Unfortunately, I failed to have him around a lot of grown men. (Says a lot about my dating) so when he did get exposed to them a little older, he barked at them like they were horrible creatures.

 

I also forgot to do stairs and cats. It came later, but it is much easier to get is as much as possible during the first few weeks you have them.

 

I also took Jack out in thunder storms, to this day when it thunders, Jack grabs a toy and heads for the door. I kid you not, He loves storms, fireworks, loud noises, I would swear he was deaf except that I could crinkle ever so gently a cheese wrapper and that boy will come flying.

 

I let all kinds of kids pet him, with close supervision. I let other dogs play with him that had their shots. I let him see people were good, sounds are fun, life is a party. Jack got off an airplane after a 12 hour day, wagging his tail and as happy as can be.. He came from good stock and was in a program called early socialization, something my breeder does from 5 to eight weeks. 

 

I think if you wait to socialize them they could become afraid. Jack is my first dog, I am about to help my mom with her puppy that is coming in 12 days. We will do the same exact thing I did with Jack except I will add more discipline in sooner.  I can not say for certain it was all my hard work and that Jack would not have come off that way anyway.

 

I for one am all about exposing them as much as possible, We have strollers that I put Jack in and wheeled him around the neighborhood. I let him walk a little in the middle of the street.

 

So as you can see, I am passionate about giving a puppy a good start... I think it is worth the effort and in the long run it pays. Again, if your dog is going to be home a lot you may not need to bring him to every store imaginable but you never know, it can't hurt..

 

Good Luck

[Julie and Maggie]

That's great Jennifer! I do envision bringing Maggie to as many places as possible that I go. I have even been online searching for fido friendly places. I would love a day trip to Carmel because they have such a great reputation for being pet friendly. 

 

I guess I struggle more with how other people will be acting, which as Adina pointed out so well, there is nothing I can do about it. Sounds like I need to look at those situations more as an opportunity than a huge bother or something that is going to thwart all my good intentions for Miss Maggie.

[Traci -Bexter & Maggie]

Julie - Enjoy your baby Maggie!  I am happy for you!  As far as other people go, (even kids), when I'm out in the neighborhood walking Bexter and they come up & ask to pet him or some people just come up & start petting him and of course he's going crazy & jumping, I tell them WAIT...I am trying to train him to sit before people pet him.  Even when they say OH, IT'S OK...I say...No he has to sit first.  Everyone has been really good about it.  One of my neighbors said to "give him a break cuz he's just a puppy..."  I just reiterated that I'm training him to sit.  You don't owe people an explanation or reason, just state that is what has to be done.  Not everyone will respect your wishes, but everyone I have encountered so far has waited for me to get him in a sit.  Worth a try.

[Jennifer and Jack]

I do the same exact thing, I tell them No it is not okay he jumps, he needs to sit to be pet. If it is a kid I will usually say a dog jumping on you is equal to someone burping in your face and blowing it on you.. They usually laugh and get the point. Jack must sit to be pet in the neighborhood or anywhere else,

 

Often times because of the tone and excitement he goes to jump and he gets a quick leash correction and ten sits, with his little but wiggling as hard and fast as it can.... He is a wiggle worm.

[Adina P]

YES!  Look at it as a training opportunity.  'How to Handle Crazy Humans Like a Polite Doggy' :)  Because these people can't thwart your good intentions if your training is good.  I try to avoid situations where my dog gets to practice the 'wrong' thing on leash (once we start more official training anyway).

[Adina P]

I meant to also add what my trainer tells me repeatedly: 'It's not what the dog does, but what YOU do in response.'  So it is your response (be it praise/reward or correction/punishment) that determines the course of training and whether your dog will get better and better or stay about the same with whatever command or behavior.  Most pups aren't ready to hold a long sit stay when a visitor comes to the door, but you work UP TO that over time until they can.  So early on you mostly want to prevent the crazy behavior with management.  But after a point they have to be held accountable for their choices (after they have practiced sit stay lots and around some distractions and have demonstrated they CAN do it).  Then it doesn't matter how hyper and encouraging the person is...at that point you hold your dog accountable for it's choices and reward generously or correct consistently.  Dogs don't improve on a steady incline...they have their testing you days and bad days but overall if YOU are consistent then they learn and become very good :)

[Leslie J]

During the first few weeks, I made sure Cocoa met at least 100 people.  She was so young people tended to sit on the ground with her so jumping was not an issue.  My focus was on socialization, not manners at this point.  We also have several lovely, vaccinated dogs on our street and I let her play with them when she was very young so she would be comfortable with other dogs. 

She is beautifully socialized with both dogs and people, but she still (at almost 2) still jumps on people when they are very animated with her.  I always stop her and tell them (the people) that we can't let her jump because if she jumps on children or the elderly she might accidentally hurt them, so we are very strict about it.  Then I make her sit to be petted. Sadly, once she sits people for some reason don't pet her, so I pet her and praise her for sitting.

It is true that some dogs love to play with dogs off-leash but don't play nicely when they are leashed.

Finally, enjoy your puppy!

[Nicky, Riley & Boris]

I'm right in the middle of all that now and I agree with both Adina and Jennifer.  You want your puppy to be exposed as much as possible to all people and situations and you also want a well behaved puppy.  Riley is really good about not jumping on children but I don't take a chance that he won't so when they come up (about 20 times a day!) I kneel down and hold him so he can't (should he decide to).  He can get very excited when he sees lots of people who all want to pet him and say hi.  As far as training goes we work on that right through the day.  Sit, down, wait for food, leave it, leash training.  I try to keep to the NILIF principle so Riley has to do something every time he wants to eat, play in fact anything at all.    At 14 weeks he is doing really well but I have decided that I will wait until he is five months to start obedience classes and until then it is simple commands and good manners and going lots of places.

[Amy, Cubbie & Ollie]

Whenever I take Cubbie out and little kids run up to him (which they always do as apparently Cubbie is a kid magnet), I always tell the kids that they can pet him only when he is sitting.  Once he sits he can get all the pets and hugs that they want.  I usually give them a few minutes (or until I see Cubbie really struggling with the urge to jump up) and then we are on our way. 

 

Now that we have added Ollie to our family it makes things a bit tougher.  I not only have to explain about not petting Cubbie until he sits but now have to add that they shouldn't pet Ollie yet since we just adopted him and he is still getting used to everything.  (Ollie seems to get easily overwhelmed and I am not sure what he would do with 10 little hands grabbing at him).  So far the kids have been pretty good about following directions but we still get an occasional uninvited petting (although it is usually by adults!!)  You won't be able to control everything, so just do what you can.  Good luck!!

[Jane Smith]

I will be working with a new trainer, and she recommended the book Dog Training for Dummies.  It has everything you could imagine in it.  If you buy it it's like $21.99, but I got it on my nook for $9.99.