Labradoodle & Goldendoodle Forum
I have been working with her since I got her and she encounters many new people all the time.
Some people it's not an issue and other people she almost runs away from. Kids are the biggest trigger for her (maybe the unpredictability). I'm trying to understand the logic.
I don't think it's fear (but I could be wrong) I just think she doesn't like strangers petting her.
She willingly goes up to strangers and sniffs them and checks them out but if they turn around to pet her she will back away. But she is better with people that she can sniff and check out first. If she smells any sign of dog on that person they get a definitely better response.
I have been giving treats to people that want to pet her, and she will take the treat and "retreat".
Is it something that is fixable?
How do I tell if it is fear or just a preference? My thinking is that it's just a personal thing.
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It is very common for dogs of all ages to dislike and avoid people petting them or touching them on top of their heads. Many dogs will flinch or back away when a hand comes at their heads, even if that hand belongs to the owner they love and trust.
Tell people to approach her from the side and stroke her sides or her chest, not her head. Nobody should be reaching a hand out at her face or head.
Yes, it is fear but as Karen said, a common one. You already know what works best. It is best if she can approach people, not the other way around. My own dog, Penny, doesn't always like the head touch. I can put my hand out to her and she will just look at me. If I crouch down, she will come in for a nice body rub.
It is definitely "fixable" or at least you can improve on it. She needs to build her confidence. There is actually a protocol called "treat/retreat" where strangers offer treats. If you can enlist strangers to help, have them offer or throw a treat and then take a step back. Your pup then will have to approach to get the next treat.
There are different versions of it that you can find if you google "Suzzanne Clothier Treat Retreat".
Thanks, I will try this.
I just want to add that some dogs are just a little shy and that is OK. Some dogs, however, can get worse and develop other anxiety. It is good that you are addressing it early. Just be careful not to push too much. It sounds like you are really good at reading your girl. Don't let her get too stressed out with training. If she clearly is not enjoying meeting someone, respect her feelings and don't push her farther than she is comfortable going. Try to have fun with it. :)
Skeet will not let anyone pet him that is standing up. Even people he knows and comes up to willingly
they must sit down before he will let them pet him. It has to be on his terms.
Lily is very much like this too. We socialized her well when she was young and I was very worried it was something we did or didn't do even though she has been loved tremendously and we have never ever hit, swatted, or used any type of harsh corrections to make her hand shy with strangers. She loves people, and is curious about them but will usually back away if approached by a stranger. One of the trainers at our dog class explained it by saying that a lot of fear is irrational, and it doesn't need to be rooted in a bad experience. She gave examples such as people who are fearful of heights or snakes haven't necessarily had a bad experience with those things. She told me to let Lily approach on her own terms and not be forced to be petted. Having strangers greet with a treat can help create positive experiences, but like Karen said- no hand reaching out towards or down to the head. Just holding the treat in their hand- arm low and let her come to them to take it. It also doesn't mean they should try and reach out to pet her afterwards.
Vern does not like strangers coming up to him at all. He likes to be the one to initiate the meeting. Fudge would go up to anyone and usually, once Vern sees her getting attention, he wants in on the action. Many times if people approach us, I ask them to just pet Fudge and I let Vern decide if he is interested. I always put both of them in a sit before allowing a greeting.
Vern also does not like the over the head pet and is much better when people drop their hand and he can sniff them first. Sometimes, he does surprise me and walks right up to someone. Fudge doesn't care who or where she is petted as long as she gets some loving.
I feel it is my job to protect Vern from unwanted advances. He is a nervous wreck in the vet's office and will sit beside me, but he is incredibly worried and stressed. Just the other day at the vet, someone asked to pet him and I said no.
"I feel it is my job to protect Vern from unwanted advances."
YES! So glad to see you write this!
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