Happy Holidays from Our House to Yours!

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

It seems like every year the month of December flies by in a whirl.  I always have high hopes that I am going to enjoy a Christmas movie every day and we are going to drive around and look at lights.  It never happens.  Usually, I am so busy trying to get everything done that I am cross and irritated.  Last night I yelled at Fudge and Vern because they were in my way as I was trying to frantically finish some last minute wrapping for gifts I need to distribute today.  Do you think Santa yells at his best elves? John had the audacity to ask for a kiss when I was getting some cookies boxed up and I screwed up my face and said, “Hurry up!” At the beginning of the week he came home to a great (wink, wink) dinner of Sloppy Joes and since he is happy whenever I attempt to cook, he said they were good.  I followed that compliment with a “they’re good enough,” and went on to tell him the name of my new cookbook is going to be Good Enough and reiterated how much I despise cooking.  He thought that was very funny and we did laugh, but I was only half kidding.  So far, this month has not been The Walton’s Christmas, but more like a Hallmark movie Maxine’s Crabby Christmas.

 

I envy those people who greet the Holidays with ease.  My sister can have twenty-five people over for Thanksgiving and only start thinking about cleaning her house on the Wednesday right before the big day.  I have been cleaning for days and I have only two guests coming home for Christmas, my daughter and her husband.  I don’t know why I feel the pressure since they are family, not really guests, and could care less about the way my house looks, but I just do.  My daughter is lucky she didn’t inherit this trait from her mother.  She hates to clean and for the longest time used to say her husband can be the stay at home when they start having children and I always answered that she would do anything to get out of cleaning.  She once helped me clean by waving the dust cloth NEAR the furniture she was supposed to be dusting and then declared cleaning wasn’t that hard at all.   Of course, I promptly fired her and sent her off into the world thinking her mother preferred to do everything herself to make sure it got done correctly.  Even now when I go to her house and she tells me she cleaned in anticipation of my arrival, I want to ask if she used actual cleaning products, but John always stops me by covering my mouth before I can put my foot in there.  It isn't that she isn't clean, it is more that I have a big mouth and like to use it. I guess my sister and daughter are what I would call intellectuals and have far more important things to do with their time than clean.  They work hard at their jobs and have a quest for knowledge that I do not have and so I guess, I clean, dust, and vacuum, and at the end of the day we all feel content with what we accomplished or in my case, righteous and prepared to fight off messy people. Consider me a modern day Anti-Dirty Harry...go ahead, make my day, drop one morsel on the floor and see what happens.

 

One of the reasons I stopped having my Christmas cookie party was because it made me nuts.  My mom was here once the week before the party and I warned her ahead of time I would be busy cleaning and to stay out of my way.  For the most part she was good, except one day she stood at the bottom of the steps and yelled, “Aye, aye, Captain. Permission to come aboard,” and I yelled back, “Denied.”  She wouldn’t let it go, however, and started saying she was hungry and felt her blood sugar dropping and got mad when I threw a sucker down there and said, “Bon appetit.”  Certainly, that sounds better than, “suck on this, woman,” but we will have to agree to disagree on that point.  I used to shut the doors to the rooms I cleaned and announce nightly that no one was to open those rooms until the party started.  Once, John asked how he was supposed to go to the bathroom since all the bathroom doors were shut and I suggested a cork or the gas station up the street.  Somehow, they rebelled and pushed their way into those bathrooms, but I made sure they knew the bathroom had better be up to my standards when they were done.  It is a hellish week before the party with me running around with a sour face, pointing out crumbs left behind on the counter tops, harrumphing when they make a mess, and dust busting any spec of dirt I see even if it happens to be on a loved one.  John is lucky if I laugh when he points out a crumb or something on his pants and says, “Eureka!  This could be the most action I have seen since you sent out your invitations!”  Mostly, no one is cracking jokes, but yelling at me to take a pill.

 

This year I promised I was cutting back and I did, but I still feel driven to make the perfect Christmas for my family.  My daughters have both said to stop all the fuss, so I have no one but myself to blame for being grumpy.  I know my one daughter has outgrown the phase she went through when we could have purchased a Ferrari, the Hope Diamond, and a Spa vacation for her only to have her say, “I can’t wait until I open my big present.”  Nope, it isn’t about the presents, but maybe I feel like it is my job to make the holidays special for my family and I just don’t want to ever hear them say, “remember the Christmas mom did nothing,” but then again, a relaxed and happy mom might be just the right present.

 

I hope we all can remember what the holidays SHOULD be about and take the time to hug those important to us, tell them we love them, and forget about the stuff that no one is ever going to remember.  Please do as I say and not as I do.

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Thanks, Christine!!

[Christine & Shelby]

Great blog... And I love the photo :)

[Laurie, Fudge, and Vern]

Nancy, NO TREE...say it ain't so :) Those stinkers called your bluff. I hate when that happens. I hope you at least baked some cookies and hid them so none of those backstabbers "no tree" people don't get any...hehe. I hope you still manage to have a great Christmas and I will think of you when I am un-decorating :) I hate that job!
Leslie, Buy the gift bags or decorative boxes. Makes it so much easier. LOL Or just hand everything out in the bags they came in to mix it up a little :) Have a great Christmas with or without wrapped gifts!!

Doris, Get some coffee down the hatch, stop procrastinating, and get busy :) LOL It isn't like you had a dozen of Doodles to care for or anything! I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and the wrestling stops long enough for you to have one relaxing night :) You are amazing!

Cheryl, Yes, I noted that earlier...a new group to defeat F....Good Enough...LOL!! I'm in...I just need to write my cookbook first starting with ground beef and a can of Manwich :)

Lynda, OMD...send that man to me :) LOL  I laughed all the way through your comment. Why is it that opposites attract?

Camilla, Thank you!

[Camilla and Darwin]

Love this, great reminders!

[Lynda Kamrath]

OMD, Laurie, you sound just like my husband.  Actually his whole family is like that and we can all just remember the way his mother said "filth".  She couldn't stand "filth" and her kids are the same.  My husband starts cleaning the house inside and out a week before someone is coming to visit and washes the window, cleans the gutters, pressure washes the deck, etc.  Luckily, he has declared himself to be my "wife" and does most of the cooking, cleaning, and recently even shopping.  Our first ever fight was when he scolded me for "never cleaning the toilet".  I told him that I had never noticed it was dirty and he told me that of course it was not because he cleaned it every week.  I had never been in the practice of cleaning things that were not dirty and he never wants anything to get dirty.  I had the same idea with my house plants.  When they started to get droopy and ask for water, I would tell them to beg.  I never go around looking for things to do, but when I see something that needs to be done, I will do it.  So....it was a big adjustment living with Charlie and for him living with me.  Well, we have adjusted to each other, but I know how John and your daughters feel.  They can relax and enjoy themselves but just wish that you could do the same.   Hey, whatever you don't get done before the holidays will still be there waiting for you after the big day.  Relax!

[Cheryl and Finnegan]

Laurie, I think you've given me my New Year's resolution.  Good enough!  Maybe we need a "Good Enough Anonymous Group." A ten step program...or is it a 12 step??  Love the picture.

[Doris, Knox & Flash]

Forgot to say that I love that pic!!  It's so YOU!

[Doris, Knox & Flash]

I needed this blog so desperately!  I keep saying to myself "slow down" but that rarely helps.  'Tis the season to act like a crazed woman, lol!  Really, I think everyone should remember the REASON for the SEASON and relax -- easier said than done, lol!

[Leslie and Halas]

I got through the first few sentences, then read the word "wrapping" and thought, "S#=T!! I forgot to wrap presents!" I guess I should get on that. I have them, but they are still all cleverly hidden in my closet.

Merry Christmas! Relax and enjoy!

[Nancy, Ned, Clancy, and Charlie]

Laurie, are we sisters at Christmas? I hate that I get so grumpy for having to do it all - but my dh and children just don't do it 'right.'  I do try to create the magic year after year. It is exhausting but I finally came to the realization that I am the only one who really cares about perfect magical Christmases.  We always decorate and get our tree Thanksgiving weekend.   I got the house decorated but we did not get a tree because we were just so busy.  I stamped my little foot and said if we don't get the tree by the weekend after Thanksgiving, we are NOT going to get one.  Well, they all called my bluff and we have no tree.  I miss it. That is called cutting off your nose to spite your face.  Oh well, looking at the bright side, I won't have to  take down a dead tree and find needles until June.