Hey Guys, Mommy said the F word!

[Clifford, Cloud, Jake..and Kim]

Hey doods, Clifford here and I'm looking for some advice. My Mommy came home from work and dropped the F word - yep, she says I'm getting a Foster sister on Friday...hey wait, that's today! Everything seems normal this morning but Mom has a different leash out and some blankets and towels - this doesn't seem right. The last time Mom said the F word she came home from work late and had this little pest called Cadi. She bit my ears, pulled my tail, took my toys and tried to eat my food. She even put her girl cooties in my water bowl - yuk! She was small so I put up with it plus she only stayed for a week and then went to pester Sheba and Duke. Mom says this girl is bigger and she mentioned to Dad he should talk to me about the birds and the bees (duh, the birds fly by and I can't catch them and they always say to stay away from the bees). Why is Mom wrecking my perfect home by bringing this new pest in here? Are there any tricks to getting her to go away real fast and to leave my stuff alone? I know there must something I can do and hope someone can help out with brilliant ideas. I'll keep you posted about how I survive this ordeal...if I survive.

[Linda and Murphy]

lifford, Murphy here. I had never heard the F word until last Saturday. Then Mom brought this obnoxoius thing home and he is STILL here. He chews my ears and pulls my tail. I am pretty sure he has FLEAS or worms or something disgusting. I tried to drown him, but he figured out how to swim.
But the worst was last night. He figured out how to climb the indoor stairs. He got in bed with me and MY Mom. WTD?! It was more than I could take. I slept downstairs on the couch.

I am ready to run away and live with my college brother. I hear frat houses are cool. And Jono taught me how to belch....really loud. You wanna come, too? Jono will teach us all kinds of cool stuff.

[Adrianne Matzkin]

Clifford - this is Samantha. My best advice is to pack you favorite toy in a bandana, tie it to a stick and get the heck out of dodge!! Wish someone would have told me that last year!

My Mom had Mickey here 6 weeks - scratching from this bug called mange, coughing, hacking and spitting up such goop all over my perfect yard. He was such a scardy cat that it took me 3 days showing him just how much walking on the grass could be. But he turned out to be okay until he decided to copy me and play ball. Now he steals it all the time! He has no manners when it comes to MY ball!

Just when I heard he was going to live with my big sister, Marissa and my boy-toy (he just loved to play ball with me anytime I wanted), Seamus, my Mom got this stupid idea in her head that I loved being a big sister! Can't figure out for the life of me how she got that idea!!! Trust me, I never thought that for 1 single second! Then she spent so much time on that computer thing of hers and not playing ball with me and found CHARLI!!!

She used to be kind of cute but i just heard Mom telling me that from day 1 Charli tried to boss me around. Even when she was only 6 weeks old and trust me, she has never stopped trying! Seriously, WTD is wrong with her. I am the alpha around here - she just can't seem to get that through the adorable doodle head of hers!

I hope your Mom and Dad don't decide to be this thing I hear my Mom say all the time 'foster failure'. I think it means that Roxanne might just be your sister forever!!

I hope she is nice, doesn't try to steal your favorite toys but learns to share them with you.

Your Mom has my Mom's phone number so if you ever need to howl, just give me a call.

Good Luck Clifford!!!

[Frannie & Callie]

Hi Clifford - I have some AWESOME tips for you! My mom is addicted to the "F" word and here's what I've learned. You have to teach that foster the ropes, and FAST. The faster they come out of their shells and behave as a proper doodle should (you know, getting on the sofa, counter surfing, etc) the faster the humans say that they are "confident" and the they go up on something called "petfinder" and become "adoptable" (they have such weird words). Good luck! We have one right now, Harvey, and he seems ok, but I like it best when I have Mom all to my self! Your Doodle Friend, Callie.

[Jane, Guinness and Murphy]

Hey Cliff...I really don't know what you're complaining about, buddy. You're getting an "F" Doodle, but that's way better than getting a big, bully brother (who will never, ever leave). You're getting a girl to play with for just a little while...and then she'll go to her forever home....sweet! I hope she's pretty. My Mom said something about her being "in heat"...I guess that means she's pretty "hot". Lucky! When your Dad tells you about the "birds and bees" will you fill me in. I'm very curious about that stuff. It may have something to do with the way I try to jump on Murphy's back....my Mom yells at me and tells me "no", but I'm not sure why. It's really fun, and Murphy doesn't mind that much. I'll be waiting to hear how things go. My Mom says that your Mom is very special to be fostering this Doodle girl who needs a "happy ending". I'm not sure what that means. All I know is that Mom cries a lot when she reads those "happy ending stories". Your buddy, Guinness.